An Unabashed Free Spirit

We have another exclusive interview to bring you. 

People in consanguinamorous relationships are everywhere, though consanguinamorists tend to be closeted. Fortunately, some are willing to be interviewed for this blog. As a result, Full Marriage Equality has featured scores of exclusive interviews with lovers denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law. Most can’t even be out of the closet or they’ll face persecution and prosecution under absurd incest laws, which, instead of focusing on abuse, also target consensual relationships.

The woman interviewed below should be free to legally and publicly marry her lovers, or simply be together without having to hide, yet they can’t. Prejudice can be deadly. They are consenting adults; why should they have been denied their rights? In much of the world, they could be criminally prosecuted for loving each other this way, and might be persecuted severely in addition.

Read the interview below and see for yourself what she has to say about the love they share. You may think this relationship is interesting, or it might make you uncomfortable, or you might find it ideal, even highly erotic, but whatever your reaction, should lovers like these be denied equal access to marriage or any other rights simply because they love each other this way?

Also please note that someone you love, respect, and admire could be in a similar relationship right now. Should they be attacked and denied rights because of the "incest" label? 

NOTE: This interview has some sexually explicit descriptions inherent to the interviewee’s life experience and the development of her philosophy.

*****

FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Describe yourself.

Robin: My name is Robin. I’m 33, a single mother of two; my son and my daughter. We live in the southwest United States. I have one sibling, my brother, Mark, who is two years older than me. We run a successful family business that allows us to live comfortably. I enjoy time with my friends and, of course. my family.  

FME: Are you married or have you ever been legally and/or ceremonially married?

I am not married nor have I ever been. I don’t personally believe in marriage, but have no conflicts with those who do. My brother has never been married, either. 

FME: How would you describe your gender? How would you describe your sexual orientation and your relationship orientation... are you heterosexual, bisexual, what? Are you monogamous, polyamorous, or....?

I am female and I identify as female. I am bisexual, definitely nonmonogamous. 

A Cautionary Tale of Polyamorous Consanguinamory

This wont be an easy or quick read. [Note: This was originally published several years ago. I’m bumping it up because it’s tied to this season. I’d very much like to publish an update on this family.]

This is an in-depth recounting from a woman who was in a polyamorous consanguinamorous triad of her own initiation. It has been several years since it ended.

It’s a cautionary tale, though, unlike most of the interviews you'll find here, because they didn’t ever *talk* about it. They never discussed anything about it. They just did it. That, along with feeling isolated because of societal negativity, made things stressful for this woman.

Communication is important in any relationship. It is especially important in polyamorous relationships, and especially polyamorous relationships that were already established before they became sexual. It’s vital when three or more people are involved. If you can’t communicate about what's going on, you shouldn’t really be attempting an ongoing relationship. Consanguineous sex is almost always explosive. The intensity is unlike anything else. There’s a reason we call it double love or a double bond. Some people liken it to an addictive drug, and this woman does, too.

Communication is important. Reaching out to others is important. Reading the whole account will take a while. As you read this, notice how things could have turned out differently if they had talked things through, and didn’t have to hide.

I present her experience in her own words below. I have organized what she told me, but these are her words. If you contact me about her, refer to her as Zoe.

PLEASE NOTE THAT SOME OF THE NARRATIVE BELOW RECOUNTS EXPLICITLY SEXUAL SITUATIONS.


*****

I’m a mid-to-late twenties female and I was in an extended sexual relationship with both parents. For a long time I've felt really isolated, and if there's someone out there that can read what happened to me and say, "Yeah, I feel that too," that's a good thing. It started when I was 18 and ended when I was 22.

California Voters: Yes on 3

Vote YES on Proposition 3!

If you’re a registered California voter, you might have received your Presidential Election ballot in the mail already.

If you’re not registered or not registered in your current location yet, you likely can still register for this election. Do so ASAP.

You should have multiple ways to vote in-person even if you don’t get a ballot in the mail or don’t want to use a mailed/mail-in ballot. You can also hand-deliver mail-in ballots.

Vote YES on Proposition 3 to advance the right to marry.

Here it is:

*****

PROPOSED AMENDMENT TO ARTICLE I

First—That Section 7.5 of Article I thereof is repealed.

SEC. 7.5. Only marriage between a man and a

woman is valid or recognized in California.

Second—That Section 7.5 is added to Article I thereof,

to read:

SEC. 7.5. (a) The right to marry is a fundamental

right.

(b) This section is in furtherance of both of the

following:

(1) The inalienable rights to enjoy life and liberty and to

pursue and obtain safety, happiness, and privacy

guaranteed by Section 1.

(2) The rights to due process and equal protection

guaranteed by Section 7.

*****

Here’s the link to the official voter information with the official language of the Proposition (it’s a PDF) if you want to see for yourself:

https://vig.cdn.sos.ca.gov/2024/general/pdf/prop3-text-proposed-laws.pdf

If you want to see the current “in the book” law as of this posting, here it is:

https://leginfo.legislature.ca.gov/faces/codes_displayText.xhtml?lawCode=CONS&division=&title=&part=&chapter=&article=I

While Proposition 3 isn’t written like the Marriage Equality Amendment this blog endorses, Proposition 3 can enable the same result with some court cases and some follow-up legislation. It removes “dead” language from the California state constitution that was determined to be a violation of the US Constitution and it adds language to the state constitution emphasizing that marriage is a right. It is wonderful that it is written in a way that doesn’t restrict that right; rights are for all.

Let’s advance EVERYONE’S freedom to marry.

Yes on 3 in California!

Lesbian Visibility Day 2023 - Wednesday April 26

A Happy Lesbian Visibility Day to all of our lesbian family and friends. Wednesday, April 26 is a day to recognize and appreciate the lesbians of the world, who’ve contributed so much and endured so much.

Lesbian Visibility Week is running from Today, Monday April 24, through Sunday, April 30.

We Still Need Full Marriage Equality

With everything that's been going on, we're late noting that June 26, 2015 was the date the U.S. Supreme Court affirmed the limited, monogamous same-sex freedom to marry nationwide. 

It was a joyous time of progress that should be remembered and celebrated. A belated Happy Anniversary to all who just marked their anniversary!

We must keep evolving towards full marriage equality, so that an adult is free to marry any and all consenting adults. We are in solidarity!

Let's keep making progress!!!

Lesbian Visibility Day 2022 - Tuesday April 26

A Happy Lesbian Visibility Day to all of our lesbian family and friends. Tuesday, April 26 is a day to recognize and appreciate the lesbians of the world, who’ve contributed so much and endured so much.

Lesbian Visibility Week is running from Today, Monday April 25, through Sunday, May 1.

Chile Keeps Our Momentum Going

Chile is the latest country to secure the limited monogamous same-sex freedom to marry.

Let's keep going until an adult is free to marry ANY and ALL consenting adults, anywhere on the planet! Let's keep making progress towards full marriage equality!

Some same-sex couples have secured the freedom to marry in The Netherlands, Belgium, Spain, Canada, South Africa, Norway, Sweden, Portugal, Iceland, Argentina, Denmark, Brazil, France, Uruguay, New Zealand, United Kingdom, Luxembourg, Finland, Ireland, Mexico, United States, Columbia, Malta, Germany, Australia, Austria, Taiwan, Ecuador, Costa Rica, Switzerland, and Chile!

When a Partner's Past Bothers You

In the Relationship Advice Reddit, a posting received a huge response both on Reddit and on Twitter. It was titled "I (28M) found out that my gf (25F) once had a threesome with her sister (22F) and it creeps me out"

I have been dating a girl I'll call Jess for just over a year now. From the beginning I thought she was a great girl and we really clicked, so generally things have been going great between us.

Sounds good, right?

Well we were drinking quite a bit that night and at one point Anne brought up a sexual encounter she recently had. While I'm not a prude, I didn't really feel comfortable talking about sex with my gf's sister so I gently tried to tell them to take the conversation back to PG territory. 

At that point Anne kinda laughed and said it's not like talking about sex is a big deal between them given all they've been through. I thought she just meant that they were sisters, but Jess had a weird look on her face, so I asked her what she meant. After some prodding they basically admitted that three years ago when Jess was still in college she brought home a guy one time when Anne was visiting her and they basically had an unplanned drunk threesome. My reaction was just wtf. Both Jess and Anne seem like normal, maybe even slightly conservative girls, so the idea that they would do this was just bats--- to me. I asked them if they regretted it, but basically they said that even though it was a mistake, they didn't necessarily feel bad about it. 

The booze was hitting us pretty badly at that point and we called it a night soon after that. We didn't mention it again until Anne left a day later, but then I had another conversation with Jess. I told her that what her sister told me made me very uncomfortable. Her response was to get defensive and say it's not like she can change anything so what's the point of dwelling on it. She said she obviously wouldn't do something like that ever again. 

The problem is somehow the situation really bothers me. I know it sounds like a fantasy to some people, but I find it quite the opposite. I don't really know how to explain it, I suppose they did nothing wrong per se, but the idea very much weirds me out. It's even weird to think about being around Anne again knowing that they have this kind of history.

I'm on Reddit. So I wrote...

Lesbian Visibility Day

A Happy Lesbian Visibility Day to all of our lesbian family and friends. April 26 is a day to recognize and appreciate the lesbians of the world, who’ve contributed so much and endured so much.

Switzerland Gains a Freedom to Marry

Switzerland is the 29th country to approve of the limited monogamous same-gender freedom to marry. Here's an article at gaystarnews.com...  

Switzerland’s parliament has passed the final vote on same-sex marriage, after a seven year campaign.

Seven years... let's speed up this momentum. Too many people are still denied their basic rights.

The vote could still be challenged by a public referendum. But even if it is, marriage equality is likely to win as the vast majority of Swiss citizens support it.

Good.

One thing the new marriage law does include, however, is access to sperm donation for same-sex female couples.

Interesting. 

Let's keep evolving so that we have FULL marriage equality and an adult is free to marry any and all consenting adults!

A Good Start by California Governor Gavin Newsom

We agree with California Governor Newsom...

People who have been convicted in California for engaging in consensual adult, sexual conduct, including consensual sexual activity between adults...are encouraged to submit a direct pardon application to Governor Newsom.

Nobody should have been arrested, let alone convicted, for sharing affection with other adults. Over the years, various states in the US have had laws criminalizing (and otherwise discriminating against) such relationships and sexuality, whether it was against unmarried sex, interracial relationships, LGBTQ people, polyamorous people, swingers, and other ethical nonmonogamists, consanguineous lovers, kinksters and fetishists, and others. Anyone convicted under these laws, or other laws used as excuses to punish such lovers, should be pardoned, whether they are still alive or not.

You can read more about what is going on California, and the work of, and persecution against the late Bayard Rustin, here.

This new clemency initiative will allow pardons for people like Rustin who were subjected to discriminatory arrest and prosecution for engaging in consensual conduct...

There are still laws on the books in California that need to be removed.

Governor Newsom, please work with the state legislature to repeal any laws still on the books in California discriminating against adults for sharing love, sex, residence, and marriage (or any of those without the others) with any and all consenting adults. There are still people in California who can't marry their lovers, some of whom can't even live authentically because they face prosecution, bullying, or discrimination. Please, Governor Newsom, work to remove all laws against consensual adult relationships and criminal convictions related to current and past laws.

Repeal unjust laws.

Pardon the unjustly convicted.

Adopt a Marriage Equality Amendment.

The Secrets of Siblings

People in consanguinamorous relationships are everywhere, though consanguinamorists tend to be closeted. Fortunately, some are willing to be interviewed for this blog. As a result, Full Marriage Equality has featured scores of exclusive interviews with lovers are denied the freedom to be open about their love and are, by law, denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law.

The man interviewed below should be free to legally marry his lovers, yet they can't, and they could be imprisoned and have their lives ruined if they were outed to the wrong people. They are consenting adults who aren't hurting anyone; why should they be denied their rights? In much of the world, including their country, they could be criminally prosecuted for their love

Read the interview below and see for yourself what this man has to say. You may think this relationship is interesting, or it might make you uncomfortable, or you might find it ideal, even highly erotic and romantic, but whatever your reaction, should these lovers be denied equal access to marriage or any other rights simply because they love each other this way?

WARNING: Mildly explicit sexuality. Also, this interview as been edited slightly for language.

*****

Finding Love With the One With You All Along

People in consanguinamorous relationships are everywhere, though consanguinamorists tend to be closeted. Fortunately, some are willing to be interviewed for this blog. As a result, Full Marriage Equality has featured scores of exclusive interviews with lovers are denied the freedom to be open about their love and are, by law, denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law.

The woman interviewed below should be free to legally marry her spouse, yet they can't, and they could be imprisoned and have their lives ruined if they were outed to the wrong people. They are consenting adults who aren't hurting anyone; why should they be denied their rights? In much of the world, including their country, they could be criminally prosecuted for their love

Read the interview below and see for yourself what this woman has to say. You may think this relationship is interesting, or it might make you uncomfortable, or you might find it ideal, even highly erotic and romantic, but whatever your reaction, should these lovers be denied equal access to marriage or any other rights simply because they love each other this way?

WARNING: Mild sexuality. 

*****

Ecuador Advances!

Good news! Ecuador is making progress.

Let's keep moving forward so that in every country, an adult will be free to marry any and all consenting adults!

Taiwan Advances

It's always good to see progress continues in moving towards full marriage equality. This time, it is in Taiwan...

Taiwan's parliament has become the first in Asia to legalise same-sex marriage following a vote on Friday.

More freedom to marry takes us closer.

Lawmakers debated three different bills to legalise same-sex unions and the government's bill, the most progressive of the three, was passed.

Good. There's still much to do, though.

The two other bills, submitted by conservative lawmakers, refer to partnerships as "same-sex family relationships" or "same-sex unions" rather than "marriages". 

But the government's bill, also the only one to offer limited adoption rights, was passed by 66 to 27 votes - backed by lawmakers from the majority Democratic Progressive Party. 

It will take effect after Taiwan's President Tsai Ing-wen passes it into law.

There simply is no reason to deny consenting adults their relationship rights, including full marriage equality. 

Same-Gender Marriage and Consanguinamory in the US

Gay marriage (or same-sex marriage, or most accurately same-gender marriage) and consanguinamory (romantic and/or erotic love between close relatives) are usually (but not always) two different things.

As of this posting, there are people fretting that allowing more consenting adults their freedom to marry is going to result in... even more consenting adults having the freedom to marry! Oh, the horror! Because the limited monogamous same-gender freedom to marry is now legal nationwide in the US, some people are asking if people in consanguineous relationships (or adult consensual incest) are going to have their rights and be treated like, you know, people.

Please note everything we're discussing here is about consensual sex and relationships between adults. We're not talking about rape or molestation.


In the US, the bigotry against marriage equality is rapidly losing out. We recently had the Supreme Court decide for the nationwide limited monogamous same-gender freedom to marry. The denial of marriage equality still currently extends to preventing first cousins from marrying in a little over half of the states. If you consider cousin marriage incestuous, then the remaining states, which allow marriages between first cousins (some with ridiculous restrictions) are where same-gender first cousins can enter into monogamous same-gender "incestuous" marriage.

Northern Ireland Needs Full Marriage Equality

Northern Ireland is the only region of the UK that doesn't even have the limited monogamous same-sex freedom to marry. This is currently making news.

Like the rest of the planet, Northern Ireland should get full marriage equality so that an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race, or religion, will be free to marry any and all consenting adults, without fear of prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.

Bea Mitchell Asks Some Good Questions

An article at pinknews.co.uk by Bea Mitchell is headlined with "Why can't gay or lesbian twins have sex with or marry each other? Why is incest wrong between same-sex siblings?"

To which we say:

1) Some do.
2) They should be free to.
3) It's not.

But let's get to what's actually in the article.

For one, incest is illegal/frowned upon/no good because of inbreeding. Children of biologically-related parents have a higher possibility of congenital birth defects.

That's Discredited Argument #18.

Although some anthropologists have argued that incest taboos are learned social conventions, they point out that even animals and plants have evolved and developed mechanisms to prevent incest.

Some have. Some are more likely to mate with close relatives.

It’s not just that it seems utterly grim to shag your relative.

Maybe for you. Not for everyone. For some people, that's what seems the best. Some people are consanguinamorous in orientation.

In many places, sleeping with one’s sibling is punishable by prison time, though others argue that ‘consensual incest’ is a victimless crime – providing the sex/relationship takes place between consenting adults.

It IS a victimless crime, where outlawed. No place should outlaw it.

Incest laws also exist in order to protect children from sexually abusive parents and older relatives.

Uh, child molestation is illegal apart from anti-consanguinmamory laws.

That said, in the interest of fairness and equality, if gay or lesbian siblings/twins fall in love and are legally allowed to marry or have sex, it’s not really fair if straight siblings/twins aren’t given the same rights just because some of them can reproduce.

Lets consenting adults have their relationships. It's that simple!

Where would the line be drawn?

Consenting adults.

She kept going back to the same discredited argument, which doesn't apply if they are unable to reproduce.

I was happy to see the article, though, because more and more people are realizing there's no good reason to deny full marriage equality.

BREAKING: Australians Vote For More Freedom to Marry

Hooray for Australians for voting to increase the freedom to marry!

Keep evolving towards full marriage equality!

Update on Unjust Prosecution in Oklahoma

Here's an update on an a reunion GSA case we last covered in this entry. As reported by Nolan Clay at newsok.com...

A woman who married her mother has pleaded guilty to incest and been put on probation.

Misty Velvet Dawn Spann, 26, pleaded guilty Tuesday in Stephens County District Court to the felony charge.

Better probation than prison, but this shouldn't be a crime in the first place.

She was sentenced to 10 years of probation and ordered to get counseling. She also must pay a $1,000 assessment, a $991 fee and court costs.

Outrageous. Adults have a fundamental right to marry.

Misty Spann and her mother, Patricia Ann Spann, 44, married in Lawton in March 2016 and lived together in Duncan, records show.

The two were charged in September 2016 after a DHS child welfare worker learned of the relationship and reported it to Duncan police.

Who was being harmed???

The incest charge against the mother is still pending.

The marriage was annulled last month after a judge concluded the mother had induced her daughter "by fraud to enter the marriage."

In her request for the annulment, Misty Spann complained her mother claimed to have "consulted with three separate attorneys who advised there would be no problem with the marriage."

Notice that's not "I don't want to be married," but rather that she thought it was legally OK.

The mother told the DHS worker she "had looked into it" and felt no laws had been violated "because her name was no longer listed on Misty's birth certificate," police reported.

Thankfully, the vast majority of consanguinamorous relationships aren't brought to the attention of law enforcement and prosecuted. Like it or not, there are genetic mothers and daughters who are, as you're reading this, hugging, kissing, making love, sleeping together and you'll never find out who they are and you'll never stop them. Some of them might even be "legally" married. Some are married in every way but other the law.

UPDATE March 15, 2018

If you're in a consanguinamrous relationship, you need to protect yourself and your lover(s).