Friday, October 9, 2015

Attention Graphic Artists Who Support Full Marriage Equality

It has been a while, so I am bumping up this call for contributions. Amateur or professional, if you're a graphic artist who supports the cause of this blog, would you be willing to make some clip art (illustrations, diagrams, symbols, etc.) for use here on this blog?

This is here to the right is something I did myself to be the logo of this blog. I'm not much of a graphic artist.

The primary use for the illustrations would be to go along with the various topics I blog about, such as with the clip art I've been using in some postings. The problem with clip art is there isn't a whole lot of it out there that communicates the idea of, say, polyandry, Genetic Sexual Attraction, consanguinamory, etc.

The clip art...

1. Must be provided to me for free. This blog is a labor of love. I do not make money from this blog, nor do I accept monetary donations. I will give you credit and a link per your request.

2. Doesn't need to be exclusive to this blog. You can use it elsewhere or let others use it. I intend to only use it for this blog, the associated Tumblr blog, and perhaps with Facebook and maybe some discussion forums in which I participate to advance the goals of this blog.

3. Doesn't need to be a large file, and can be simple. They can be literal (realistic or stylized), symbolic, or abstract.

4. Needs to be your original creation, or if you use something from someone else, it can't violate copyrights.

5. Send me as many or few as you want, but each one should should represent one of the terms found in this blog's glossary or... same-gender relationships, male-female relationships, allies and/or solidarity, breaking up homes, brother-brother, brother-sister, sister-sister, father-adult daughter, father-adult son, mother-adult son, mother-adult daughter, coming out of the closet, consanguinamory, Genetic Sexual Attraction, inequality, monogamy, open marriage/relationship, polyamory in general, polyamorous "V", polyamorous triangle, polygyny, polyandry, and science.

6. Will advance the cause of relationship rights for all consenting adults.

7. Can be emailed to me at fullmarriageequality at yahoo dot com

Thank you!
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Thursday, October 8, 2015

Frequently Asked Question: Can Siblings Marry?

The following is based on my understanding. I’m not at attorney and this should not be considered legal advice.

Can siblings marry?

I’m not aware of any government that will currently marry full-blood siblings or recognize a marriage of full-blood siblings; rather, if it was discovered by the authorities after an official marriage was formed that the spouses were, in fact, siblings, the marriage would be dissolved and considered invalid. If the spouses knew they were siblings when they married, they would be subject to prosecution. If they discovered the genetic relationship after getting married, they would have to file for an annulment or dissolution or risk prosecution.

Where sibling consanguinamory isn’t still banned by law, siblings can have a wedding ceremony and live the married life, although under discrimination, as their government will not recognize their marriage and they will not get treated equally.

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Wednesday, October 7, 2015

Dear Abby Gets Letter From Prejudiced Stepmom

In today's Dear Abby column, the first letter was from "REPULSED IN PENNSYLVANIA"...

I am happily married to a great man. I have a young daughter from a previous marriage, and my husband has two teenagers, a boy and girl, from a prior marriage. Like many blended families, we have our struggles, but one is becoming increasingly difficult to deal with.
I don't know how to put this tastefully, but I'll state it this way: My stepchildren are "too close," if you know what I mean.
Many people commenting at Yahoo News are misreading the headline and column and thinking this is about her daughter and her husband's son, who are stepsiblings. But it is actually about her husband's son and daughter, who, if neither is adopted, are biological siblings.

"Teenagers" can mean they are 19 and 18. It could  also mean they are 13 and  14. Or it could mean one is 19 and the other is 13.

And what does "too close" mean? Read on...

They flirt, constantly touch each other and playfully tease each other.
Oh, no! Siblings who are actually affectionate instead of hostile! What is the world coming to?!?
(A few people have even mistaken them for a couple.)
So what? I have gone places with my mother and people have mistaken us for a couple even without any touching or flirting.
My husband doesn't seem to notice this unhealthy behavior.
Assuming they are four years in age or less apart, there is nothing unhealthy about their behavior. Even if they were having sex, that doesn't make it unhealthy.
How can I get through to my husband or deal with this?
As many other people ask, including Dear Abby, didn't she notice this before she married their father? Did she think she was going to change them once she because their stepmother? Why should her husband even try to stop them from being affectionate? If this woman pushes the issue, she's going to find herself out of another marriage.

Their affection may go no further than what she sees. Or, they could be deeply in love or engaging in recreational sex. Whatever the case, as long as this is a mutually affectionate relationship instead of one abusing the other, what try to interfere? There is no good reason.

I wonder if her stepchildren spent a significant part of their childhood apart as a result of the end of his prior marriage? If so, then it could be Genetic Sexual Attraction. But even if they were raised together, it is possible the Westermarck Effect isn't strongly present with them. Or they could just be close and not having sex.

Whatever the case, this woman is not going to accomplish anything good by trying to change them. She should read this.

Many of the comments mistaking this for a stepsibling situation recount stepsibling relationships that involved sex, some of which involved marriages between stebsiblings. Unfortunately, there are plenty of comments hostile to consanguinamory, too.
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Tuesday, October 6, 2015

Persistant Prejudice Against Cousins

Someone posting at asked for help with "incest" in her family. Now, that can provoke thoughts of some adult forcing themselves onto a child, right? But she's talking about cousins in a consensual relationship.
I come from a big family. I have three sister and one brother. So this basically what happened between sister 2 and my brother family. 
 My sister 2 has three sons and a daughter. My brother has three daughters. My sister first son (who I call call Sam) is in a relationship with my brother second daughter (who I'll call Barb).
This shouldn't be a problem. Assuming she and her siblings are all full-blood siblings, then Sam and Barb are first cousins, who can legally marry in many places, including about half of US states.

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Monday, October 5, 2015

The Two Main Paths to Consanguinamory

There are two main paths to consanguinamory, or the objective reality that at least two closely biologically related people have sex, and perhaps an ongoing romance or marriage-style relationship. While the prejudiced may dismiss all consanguinamory as the same (in their small minds) inexcusable behavior, the differences in these paths do have an impact on the participants and those around them. This is why people who are on one path may not understand those on the other, or want to be associated with them.

One main path to consanguinamory is Genetic Sexual Attraction (GSA). GSA is an extremely intense attraction that may occur when close biological relatives meet any time after puberty either for the very first time, or the first time since the youngest went through puberty. These situations are likely to increase due to increased human mobility and the high rates of co-parents who do not stay together. Whether a marriage that involved at least one child ends in divorce, or a one night stand results in pregnancy, or anything between, a man and woman who have a child together may go their separate ways, often going on to have more children with others. The situations are are also likely to increase due to increase in the use of donated eggs, sperm, and embryos to have a child. In addition to the various forms of adoptions, some governments, such as some states in the US, allow someone to bring a newborn to a hospital, police station, fire station, etc, and surrender custody of the child with no penalty.

As you can see, there are many situations in which close relatives, such as full or half siblings, or a parent and child, can be reunited post-puberty.

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Sunday, October 4, 2015

Sibling Rivalry or Sibling Revelry

I used to be active on a certain Big Online Portal's question-and-answer feature, answering questions related to full marriage equality and relationship rights for all adults, and occasionally questions about teenager sexuality. I still read what goes on there. Every once in a while, someone will ask a question like this...
I caught my siblings making out, what should i do?
I caught my 16 year old sister and 17 year old brother making out, I don't really know what to do. To be honest I'm very shocked, and a bit disoriented thinking about it. They're both pretty attractive, I don't see why they would shack up with each other when they could go out and get people who... aren't related to them.

I want to tell ma and pa, but they begged me not to, don't really know how to approach this situation, Or if I should just respect their privacy. I guess I'm just worried about their mental health, but I guess that's pretty unfair of me to assume something is wrong with them.

What do i do?
For all we know, the teens "making out" with each other are both half-siblings to the asker, and unrelated to each other, or they could be stepsiblings or adopted siblings. Or, they could be half or full-blood siblings to each other. (It might have even been a Genetic Sexual Attraction situation if the siblings have not been raised together.) Whatever their genetic, legal, and social relation, it isn't uncommon for siblings as close in age as they are, especially in their teens, to have such affection between them.

Also, we don't know where they live, and thus whether or not they live somewhere where it is legal for a 17-year-old and 16-year-old to have sex with each other.

Most therapists consider such sibling behavior, absent any coercion, force, or intimidation, to be mutual experimentation or exploration.

In general, however, my advice to someone in the asker's position is to:

1. Confirm this is a voluntary activity. If observing wasn't enough, ask the younger/smaller/less assertive/more needy sibling if they are being pressured, intimidated, coerced, or forced in any way.

2. Respect their privacy. Start by reminding them it's a good idea to be discreet and promise you will knock.

3. Protect and support them.

4. If needed, assist them in accessing contraception and health care.

(See this extensive advice at The Final Manifesto for friends and family of consanguinamorous siblings.)
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Saturday, October 3, 2015

Tell Your Story

Are you, or have you ever been, in a “forbidden” consensual relationship?

Is one of your parents, children, or other family members in such a relationship, or have they been?

Are you the adult child of such a relationship, whether you were a biological child, adopted, or stepchild?

If you can say "yes" to one or more of those questions, I’d like to interview you. It doesn’t matter if the relationship is/was very casual, is a serious lifelong relationship, or somewhere between.

What qualifies as “forbidden?” While most of my interviews printed on the blog so far have been with people in consanguinamorous (consensual incest) relationships, I’m also interested in any consensual adult relationships that are forbidden by law, custom, tradition, community, or family and/or is subject to discrimination. This includes, but isn’t necessarily limited to, relationships with someone who is from an older or younger (adult) generation, or from a different race; gay or lesbian relationships; open relationships or marriages, relationships that include swinging, swapping, group, or polyamorous relationships; polygamous relationships or marriages, plural marriages, polyandry, or polygyny; and relationships often perceived as incestuous, such as between cousins, or Genetic Sexual Attraction relationships, or being with a close blood, step, adoptive, or in-law relative.

I’d like to interview you and publish the interview on my blog, and I can do so while protecting your anonymity.

What you get in return:

1. Loads of cash. Well, no, not really. I don’t accept funding for this blog and I won’t pay for participation. Sorry. This blog is a labor of love in every sense of the word. Also, I want people who just want to sincerely share their experiences, not someone who is will sensationalize for cash.

2. The satisfaction of knowing you are making a difference in the lives of many people around the world. People are relieved to read of other experiences like their own, and those who wonder about these relationships come away a little more enlightened.

3. Being able to tell of your relationship and experiences to someone who supports your rights and respects you.

4. A link to a website or profile of yours, depending on privacy issues.

The best way to contact me is via email. Check the Get Connected tab at the top of the screen.
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Friday, October 2, 2015

Women Can Have Multiple Spouses, Too

Or, There’s More to Polygamy Than Polygyny

Women can enjoy multiple spouses, multiple husbands, multiple wives, multiple partners, multiple girlfriends, multiple boyfriends, and dating multiple people. A woman can love more than one person, have multiple ongoing romantic relationships, and have multiple ongoing sexual relationships.

Regular readers of this blog may find such statements to be obvious, but way too often, when I read or hear news or commentary about “polygamy,” what is meant is “polygyny” (one husband, multiple wives). Polyandry, meaning one wife with multiple husbands, has existed in tradition and still exists in modern relationships, and it is polygamy, too, as are spousal relationships between multiple women and multiple men, or three or more men, or three or more women.

This blog supports relationship rights for adults regardless of gender. A woman should be just as free as a man to marry more than one person, regardless of their genders or how closely related, and just as free as a man to not marry at all. or to leave a marriage.

Polyamory and Polygamy
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Thursday, October 1, 2015

What Really Happened in Clinton, North Carolina?

Chris Berendt at has given a report that is woefully lacking in details, and I don't know if law enforcement or the news organization share the blame or if one is more at fault than the other.
A Clinton man has been arrested for having sex with a family member, actions alleged to have taken place “a couple years ago,” Clinton police investigators said.
"Having sex" implies this was consensual activity with an adult. Assault or child molestation isn't "having sex."

William Ashley Hines, 42, of [home address redacted], stands charged with incest and two counts of crime against nature.
"Crime against nature." What does that even mean? Consanguineous sex is not against nature.
“A family member turned over some internet communications with an individual he was having out-of-state,” Clinton Police Chief Jay Tilley said Tuesday. “From there we found out about an assault that occurred concerning (his family member).”
An assault is not "having sex." So which was it?
The Independent declines to release names or ages of victims in cases of a sexual nature. The nature of Hines’ relationship with the family member likewise will not released, as it would in no uncertain terms serve to disclose that person’s identity.
But they have no problem providing his home address, even though he hasn't been convicted.
Tilley said the investigation is still open and there could still be more charges brought in the case. The State Bureau of Investigation has seized Hines’ computer and is currently examining its contents.

“This is still an ongoing investigation,” Tilley stated.
If this was an assault or molestation, surely he could have been arrested under those charges?

If this was an assault, the news sources shouldn't be using the phrase "having sex."  And if he is guilty of an assault, he should be locked away in a very bad place for a very long time.

If this was consensual interaction with another adult, the police shouldn't be calling it an assault, and they shouldn't be involved at all.

So what really happened?

We don't really know. Given his age, it is entirely possible this was an adult child, or niece, or nephew, or sibling, or aunt, or uncle, or parent. Depending on the state, it could be a cousin. That the other person is out of state is a reminder that this could be a situation involving Genetic Sexual Attraction.We don't know if he's a dangerous person or a persecuted lover. We don't know because either law enforcement and/or journalists haven't provided that information, at least not through this report. Many news sources report on stories like this with enough information to clarify between assault and persecuted love without revealing identities. Too bad they all don't.
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Wednesday, September 30, 2015

Have a Look Around

Are you new to this blog? Maybe you've been here before, but have missed some of the features here.

Over there in the column on the right you can find ways to connect and to follow this blog.

There at the top of the page are tabs with drop-downs of some important pages, entries, and links.

There's a Welcome message and there's an About This Blog page, and you can read about the triad that originally inspired this blog.

There's a Glossary so that you can become familiar with terms frequently used here.

I explain why we need solidarity in supporting full marriage equality and I debunk all the arguments that you'll ever hear made against equality.

On the Case Studies page I feature interviews with people who have been denied their rights, so you can "meet" people who are, or have been, in consensual loving relationships who have are harmed by the lack of equality under the law.

Are you here because of polyamory or polygamy? Perhaps you're here because this blog covers Genetic Sexual Attraction or consanguinamory (consensual incest)? Do you need help?

Whether you're a family member or friend who is looking for more information, or a journalist, or are someone who is looking to help the cause, I hope you are helped by what is here.

This blog is a labor of love. There's no advertising and we don't accept monetary contributions. Want to help? Spread the word. Also, this blog DOES accept content submissions (fullmarriageequality at yahoo dot com), but makes no offer, implicit nor explicit, of compensation nor guarantees that it will be used.

A very kind person improved this blog's template. I hope you are liking the look. I still need to take care of a couple of things.

Tell me what you think!
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Experienced Mother Offers Help to Others

While consanguineous relationships take place everywhere, living in a sparsely populated area can foster additional conditions that foster such relationships. I've covered many consanguineous relationships though exclusive interviews, and while many share certain traits, there is still diversity within the group. Below is a shorter interview that some may find shocking and others might find incredibly erotic, but whatever your reaction, consider that consenting adults are denied their rights to be together in many places. Is that good policy? Whether someone likes any given adult relationship others are having, should people outside that relationship be able to force lovers apart?


FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Tell us about yourself.

Sybil: My name is Sybil Sybarite and I live in the far north of  British Columbia, Canada. I am married to a petroleum engineer, who is married to his job, and I am OK with that, because that is his life's work. I am 5'9'' slim build long black hair and piercing eyes. I am a female medical doctor and an online life coach. I hold a medical degree, and masters in Psychology. I have six siblings and I have had multiple children. My husband and I have been together since childhood and been married more than twenty years.

FME: How would you describe your sexual orientation and your relationship orientation?

I am bisexual in a marriage with a bisexual husband. We are polyamorists.

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Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Why More Will Try Polyamory

Thanks to for continuing to feature good content respecting polyamorous families and individuals. Elisabeth Sheff, Ph.D had another good writeup there, titled "Fear of the Polyamorous Possibility." It is about why some people feel threatened by polyamory. [This entry is being bumped up.]

There are three common reactions, she says, to the realization that polyamory is a possibility. You'll have to click through if you want to read about those, but I wanted to note that she explains why there is the potential of a much larger percentage of the population having polyamorous relationships.
Among forms of sexual nonconformity, polyamory is unusual in that it could potentially be appealing to everyone who desires intimate relationships with other people. Most people are heterosexual, and it is readily apparent that not every one experiences same-sex sexual attraction or desire. In other words, not everyone has the capacity or desire to be gay, lesbian, or bisexual. Unless they are monogamous by orientation, however, most people in long-term relationships -- regardless of sexual orientation -- have had the experience of being attracted to someone else besides their partner. Almost everyone has the potential to be polyamorous in a way that many people do not have that same potential to be gay.
Just about anyone who has been in a long-term relationship, no matter how happy they have been in that relationship, has experienced a desire for, or daydream of, doing something with someone that might not be considered appropriate, and not because they want to betray or hurt the other person in the relationship, but because they find this "third" person fascinating, attractive, or they share something in common. It doesn't have to be sexual. It could be an emotional connection, or simply wanting to share some recreational experience. It could be going to a concert, or hiking and camping in a specific spot, a mutual interest in a style of dance or cuisine. Or, it could be entirely sexual, or romantic, or emotional. There are so very many ways that polyamory can be experienced, and many people who don't need polyamory can still want and enjoy at least a season in which they have more than one relationship, without lying or sneaking around.

Despite the claims of some bigots, adopting the same-gender freedom to marry and eliminating other forms of prejudice against LGBT people does not make one more person gay or lesbian. Removing discrimination against ethical nonmonogamy, and especially adopting the polygamous freedom to marry, will mean more people will enjoy polyamory, because you don't have to need polyamory to enjoy polyamory.
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