Translate

Wednesday, September 20, 2017

How to Be An Ally To Consanguinamorous People You Know

This is about how to be an ally to someone you personally know who is in, or may be in, a consanguinamorous relationship, or any consensual relationship that is called incestuous. If you want to help consanguinamorous people in general, see this page.

The Short Answer:

A) Respect their boundaries. Do not out them or share their secrets, and do not press them for anything they don't want to share. ASSURE THEM YOU WON'T BETRAY THEM.

B) Be willing to listen.

C) Cover for them as necessary.


The Long Answer

— — —

Tuesday, September 19, 2017

Myth: Acting on GSA Needs to be Criminalized, Prosecuted, and Stopped

Reality: There’s no stopping Genetic Sexual Attraction, although someone can attempt to prevent others from acting sexually on GSA, but decriminalizing GSA and bringing it out of the shadows is the best thing to do all-around.

If someone thinks having a consanguinamorous relationship is always a bad idea, it still hurts more than it helps to criminalize consanguineous sex. People experiencing GSA need to be completely free to seek assistance if they want it. Criminalization hinders that. Therapists and other counselors should be learning about GSA and learning how to help people who are experiencing it.

Some people say criminalization is needed to prevent societal collapse due to everyone making mutant babies with their close relatives. As already explained, most children born to close relatives are healthy. Even so, consanguinamory and reproduction are two different things.

We can also look at places where it is legal for close relatives to have sex and children together, such as Spain, Portugal, Rhode Island, and New Jersey. Has there been a crisis as a result in any of those places?

Another part of this myth is that laws against consanguinamory prevent abuse. Abuse is illegal regardless of consanguinamory laws, and criminalizing consensual sex actually makes it more difficult to get victims and witnesses to cooperate in the prosecuting of abusers. Even if you want someone to get through GSA without having a(n ongoing) sexual relationship, criminalization is counterproductive. The only way to stop sex between those involved is to have constant, direct supervision of all reunited/introduced close genetic relatives 24/7/365. This, however, is needless. For some, the involvement is for a season and it will pass. For others, it will last a lifetime. Either way, there’s no good reason to try to stop it.

See Myth: It is Illegal Everywhere to Act on GSA

See Myth: People in GSA Relationships Don’t Need the Freedom to Marry



— — —

Monday, September 18, 2017

Jane Interviews Kelly

Our dear friend Jane has interviewed a woman named Kelly, who has quite the relationship with the people she loves most.



Read it here.
— — —

Sunday, September 17, 2017

Attention Graphic Artists Who Support Full Marriage Equality

It has been a while, so I am bumping up this call for contributions. Amateur or professional, if you're a graphic artist who supports the cause of this blog, would you be willing to make some clip art (illustrations, diagrams, symbols, etc.) for use here on this blog?

This is here to the right is something I did myself to be the logo of this blog. I'm not much of a graphic artist.

The primary use for the illustrations would be to go along with the various topics I blog about, such as with the clip art I've been using in some postings. The problem with clip art is there isn't a whole lot of it out there that communicates the idea of, say, polyandry, Genetic Sexual Attraction, consanguinamory, etc.

The clip art...

1. Must be provided to me for free. This blog is a labor of love. I do not make money from this blog, nor do I accept monetary donations. I will give you credit and a link per your request.

2. Doesn't need to be exclusive to this blog. You can use it elsewhere or let others use it. I intend to only use it for this blog, the associated Tumblr blog, and perhaps with Facebook and maybe some discussion forums in which I participate to advance the goals of this blog.

3. Doesn't need to be a large file, and can be simple. They can be literal (realistic or stylized), symbolic, or abstract.

4. Needs to be your original creation, or if you use something from someone else, it can't violate copyrights.

5. Send me as many or few as you want, but each one should should represent one of the terms found in this blog's glossary or... same-gender relationships, male-female relationships, allies and/or solidarity, breaking up homes, brother-brother, brother-sister, sister-sister, father-adult daughter, father-adult son, mother-adult son, mother-adult daughter, coming out of the closet, consanguinamory, Genetic Sexual Attraction, inequality, monogamy, open marriage/relationship, polyamory in general, polyamorous "V", polyamorous triangle, polygyny, polyandry, and science.

6. Will advance the cause of relationship rights for all consenting adults.

7. Can be emailed to me at fullmarriageequality at yahoo dot com

Thank you!
— — —

Successful GSA Relationships


There is a split in the Genetic Sexual Attraction community, as I have noted before. I checked out a certain other site's posting with the same title as this entry. Below, I analyze what was written.
We often get this question- Are there any successful GSA relationships?
To answer the question... YES!

Are people in such relationships willing to do interviews that reveal their identities? Almost never.
Or the media will inquire about speaking with GSA couples living in the shadows of society afraid to announce they are actually reunited family members living as lovers.

I don't think many of those couples (or triads) are likely to keep in friendly contact with these negative naysayers. I know some who don't, and they ceased contact after they took over an established forum where people had long been contributing.
The more I work with the GSA community the more I hear about heartbreak and pain, because most often these relationships do not work.
Because that is that is who you attract! You take a negative attitude towards GSA and you offer sex-negative counseling for people who are having problems. What happy lovers are going to bother to come to you, especially if they have to pay money (leaving an clear, easily obtainable trail of evidence some ridiculous prosecutor could use) just to use your forum?

Most romantic/sexual relationships do not "work" if you mean by that "lasting for a lifetime and that lifetime not ending in the murder of one by the other." Most relationships break up, or most of us would still be in our first relationships. But there ARE lasting, happy, loving and very passionate relationships initiated through GSA.

— — —

Friday, September 15, 2017

Myth: It is Illegal Everywhere to Act on GSA

Reality: No it isn't. It is not illegal everywhere to act on Genetic Sexual Attraction by having consanguineous sex or a consanguinamorous relationship. There are many countries where it isn't criminalized and a few states in the US with no or only some criminalization of adult relationships.

Where there still is criminalization of relationships between consenting adults, those unjust laws must go.

It is important to keep in mind that even where consanguinamory isn't criminalized, lovers are usually still unprotected from discrimination or bullying. Also, full marriage equality is needed in order for them to marry.

Lovers should protect themselves.

Friends and family should help protect and support them.

Let's make things better sooner rather than later.

See Myth: People Only Experience GSA Because They’d Heard About It or Knew of Their Relation

See Myth: Acting on GSA Needs to be Criminalized, Prosecuted, and Stopped
— — —

Thursday, September 14, 2017

Living Consanguinamorously - Keeping the Closet Door Closed


Someone came to this blog recently searching...
How my aunt and I can hide our incestuous relationship
The answer below will apply to consanguinamorous relationships of any composition, not just aunts and nephews or aunts and nieces.

Unfortunately, people have been compelled to stay closeted due to prejudice and bigotry, sometimes enshrined in law. Whether someone has had to hide or downplay their gender identity, their sexual orientation or their "forbidden" relationship, the oppression is harmful in many ways, but some people just can't come out of the closet, at least not at a specific time in their life. In some places, it is literally a matter of life and death. Even for places where consanguinamory isn't criminalized, many people in these relationships have good reasons to hide them from at least some of the people around them. As a result, many people don't realize they know people who are in consanguinamorous relationships.

In a perfect world, people would be able to simply love other adults without such problems, but we're not there yet. Civil rights, including things like full marriage equality, are generally advancing, at least on most of the planet, but there is still a ways to go.

Much of the answer raised by the question in the search was answered in an earlier entry about how consanguineous lovers can live together, so check that out.

There's also this entry on how consanguineous lovers can avoid trouble.

I'll try to avoid repeating too much of what is in those entries.
— — —

Wednesday, September 13, 2017

For Consanguinamorists Considering Parenting

At this blog's sister Tumblr, I was asked anonymously about the health children from consanguineous parents, why there is a taboo about this, and what advice I have for a mother and son having a baby.  My answers, which I'm cross-posting here, mostly apply to any consanguinamorous parents.
— — —

Tuesday, September 12, 2017

Falsely Invoking Science to Justify Bigotry

The "genetics argument" against consanguineous sex and marriage is usually a smokescreen that misuses science to justify bigotry.  There are some people sincerely concerned about children born to consanguineous parents (many of whom would have their concerns eased with a little education on the matter) but most of the people who use the "What about the children?" argument are simply trying to excuse their prejudice, because it sounds better than "I don't like the idea of it."

Ask someone who invokes Discredited Argument #18 if they drop opposition when it comes to a relationship that will not create biological children, such as two cisgender brothers, or a sister with a brother who has had a vasectomy, or siblings over the age of 60. Most will be stumped or will say no, they still oppose such relationships, perhaps citing another Discredited Argument, probably #1 or 3.

Another way of exposing this as a smokescreen is to ask them if they support the same restrictions on an unrelated heterosexual couple in which the woman is 40 years of age.

The fact is, we don't prevent people with known, serious genetic diseases, or who have lived all of their lives in the same neighborhood with pollutants known to cause birth defects, or who have taken medications known to cause birth defects from dating, having sex, marrying, having children, etc., so why deny rights to consanguineous lovers who are more likely to have healthy children together or won't be having children at all?

Everyone knows happy, healthy, intelligent, adorable children born to close relatives, whether they know it or not, and whether the children themselves know of their true biological ancestry or not. I can point to such people whose parents were close relatives. Should they have not been born?

Most children born to consanguineous parents are healthy. That's a fact. We don't hear about that much. Instead, "horror" stories are sensationalized... where a tyrannical patriarch or set of people isolated their family and abused children, engaging in deliberate inbreeding over generations. The problems resulting are often caused by the lack of prenatal care, lack of medical treatment, poor nutrition, physical abuse, substance abuse, poor hygiene, a polluted environment, etc. That's as far removed from what this blog is about (loving relationships between consenting adults) as possible. Cases like that do not justify denying consanguinamorous adults their right to be together in whatever way they want.

Bigotry and restrictions against consanguineous lovers predate a good understanding of genetics. It is just that people now misapply facts about genetics to cover for their dislike of the idea of consanguinamory.
— — —

Monday, September 11, 2017

Myth: People Only Experience GSA Because They’d Heard About It or Knew of Their Relation

Reality: There have been people who’ve experienced Genetic Sexual Attraction who were unaware of their genetic relation and had never heard of GSA before.

Trying to blame people for experiencing GSA can be like trying to blame someone for where they were born. 

Sons and daughters had no control over being placed in the circumstances that resulted in reunion GSA. Siblings usually didn’t either, although there are a few situations in which an older sibling, especially a half sibling, chose to be away from their younger sibling during the critical years of childhood, but it’s not immoral to, for example, go away to college or relocate for work or pleasure. While it is nice for family to visit, an adult older sibling has no moral obligation to make sure they are around their parent’s youngest child enough to ensure GSA doesn’t happen.

Genetic parents are more likely to have some control over the circumstances, but they don’t always. Some of them don’t even know they have a genetic child “out there” until that child, now an adult, shows up on their doorstep or in their online inbox.

GSA is a normal, natural reaction to the circumstances.

See Myth: If Only They'd Known Ahead of Time, GSA Wouldn't Have Happened

See Myth: It is Illegal Everywhere to Act on GSA
— — —

Sunday, September 10, 2017

Jane's Latest Survey

If you are strongly attracted to one or more close relatives and it's NOT a reunion situation in which you didn't have much contact with them while you were grown up, but rather they've been in your life all along or most of the time, Jane's latest survey is for you. Please take it.
— — —

Saturday, September 9, 2017

How to Pull Off Living With Your Consanguinamorous Partner(s)

So you're in a consanguinamorous relationship and having the time of your life, or you're considering it, and you want to know about the possibilities and how-to when it comes to living with your lover. Some of you will want separate residences but most of you want to reside together. Someday, the considerations written below will no longer be necessary because things will be better, but for now, these serious considerations are necessary.

On the "good news" side is that, while there is much bigotry in many places against consanguinamory, often including criminalization, so that some lovers can't marry or sex is illegal, there are no laws against relatives living together and most cultures encourage it instead of discouraging it. There is a long history of family members living together. Although there has been an "American Dream" portraying a "nuclear family" married man and woman (not closely rated) living in a single-family house with 2.3 children, the reality has always been different for most people. One common variation has been for a couple (married or unmarried) or a single person to live with their parents or have a parent living with them, having one or more sibling living with them, etc.
— — —