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Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Facebook and Twitter and More

Have you joined the Facebook group yet? Join "I Support Full Marriage Equality."

You should also like this page, Full Marriage Equality, and we meant that.

Are we Facebook friends? I want to be friends with all who support full marriage equality and relationship rights for all adults. Here I am.

Are we connected on Twitter? Here I am.

Are we connected on Tumblr? Here I am.

If you don't want to connect, still feel free to send me a note. I can be reached at fullmarriageequality at yahoo dot com

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Monday, May 4, 2015

The Husband Swap is Now Available





At independent.co.uk, interviews our friend Louisa Leontiades about her experiences with ethical nonmonogamy and her new book, The Husband Swap


What did you learn from becoming polyamorous?
I think if there overarching lesson, not only from this kind of relationship but all of it, is to really try and love yourself with everything you do because if you don’t that hatred for yourself and dislike will be projected onto others and your low self esteem will lead to insecurity and jealousy and possessiveness and entitlement.
Relationships often bring growth and learning, and polyamorous relationships often mean more growth and learning.





Do you have a message for people who call you [a slut]?

I don’t tend to respond to “slut”. What I will respond to is reasoned argument and I haven’t found one yet that I can’t call out a logical fallacy or a societal norm that is assumed as a norm for everybody. The slut ones… It’s their opinion and they are entitled to their opinion but they’re not the people I’m trying to reach. Many people simply jump on the bandwagon.

For those it offends, any change or any difference in lifestyle or inclination that threatens the norm does threaten the establishment. Many of the minority movements have basically the same battle, where their choices, simply by being different have threatened other people’s sense of their own rightness. The mind sometimes equates being right with surviving, in order to survive people like to be right.
It's great to see that this book is now available!

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NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #5


“It's not natural." Many people have been embarrassed by making this argument, because it is so easy to refute by a cursory survey of sexual, mating, and partnering habits of various animals. But invariably, the person saying that a relationship should not be allowed because they think it is unnatural constantly enjoys things that aren’t natural, from their smart phones to their toiletries to their food to their clothing to their transportation to their housing… on and on it goes. “Hey! You can’t ride a bicycle! It’s not natural!” See how ridiculous that is?

There is no good reason to deny an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race or religion, the right to share love, sex, residence, and marriage (or any of those without the others) with any and all consenting adults without prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.

Feel free to share, copy and paste, and otherwise distribute. This has been adapted from this page at Full Marriage Equality: http://marriage-equality.blogspot.com/p/discredited-invalid-arguments.html

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #4

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #6 
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Sunday, May 3, 2015

Discussing Consanguinamory


Consanguinamorous relationships are often ignorantly dismissed as dysfunctional, sick, or abusive, and sometimes the "incest" discussions found at porn sites do little to dispel that impression. However, and Kindred Spirits forum, which is NOT a porn forum, the discussions are sincere and reflect how real, beautiful, and in many ways, "normal" consanguinamorous relationships can be.

For example, here's a woman describing her relationship that was initiated through Genetic Sexual Attraction...
For [us] the most important things are the respect that we have for each other and remembering to always listen. [He] is my best friend, my partner and my lover. We have often wondered if the reason the sex is so good was because of the brother/sister element. We decided that we just fit together perfectly for what ever reason. Being non judgemental of each others desires and taking time to learn about what we both need.
He walks in the door after work and we are both just happy to be in each others company again especially knowing that we would give almost everything up to protect what we have.
Why would anyone want to kill such love? Why should they have to hide? Why shouldn't they be free to be open about their love and, if they want, to marry? There's no good reason.

If you want to discuss consanguinamory (consensual incest), I know of no better forum than Kindred Spirits, which is free. But if you join, be sure to immediately read and follow all of the rules, or you'll be kicked right off. If you are a Friend of Lily, it can be very helpful to join with others to discuss life in general, as well as the love you have or had.

At their site, this is the icon for Frequently Asked Questions...



This is the icon you use to register.


 And this is the icon you click to sign in.
 





There's a lot of activity there these days, so if you want to join in on the fun and learn something and help others as well as yourself, check it out!
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Saturday, May 2, 2015

NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #4


“My religion is against it.” If you don’t want an (adult) intergenerational, interracial, same-gender, polygamous, or consanguineous relationship or marriage, then don’t have one. But we should all have the freedoms of religion and association and in places like the US, we have separation of church and state, so this can’t be a justification for denying marriage equality or other relationships rights.

There is no good reason to deny an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race or religion, the right to share love, sex, residence, and marriage (or any of those without the others) with any and all consenting adults without prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.

Feel free to share, copy and paste, and otherwise distribute. This has been adapted from this page at Full Marriage Equality: http://marriage-equality.blogspot.com/p/discredited-invalid-arguments.html

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #3

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #5 
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Friday, May 1, 2015

Blog Recommendation

If you like this blog, you should check out The Final Manifesto on blogspot as well.

Do you know other blogs like ours? Meaning (mostly) Safe For Work supporters of full marriage equality? Do tell!
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NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #3


“Not a lot of people want to do it” or “I don’t want to do it.” This is not a justification for keeping something illegal. If anything, it is a reason laws against consensual adult relationships are wasteful and unnecessary. But we don’t deny minorities rights based on majority vote. Also, people would be surprised to know just how many people around them are in, or want to be in, or have been in, a relationship that is currently illegal or otherwise discriminated against.

There is no good reason to deny an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race or religion, the right to share love, sex, residence, and marriage with any and all consenting adults without prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.

Feel free to share, copy and paste, and otherwise distribute. This has been adapted from this page at Full Marriage Equality: http://marriage-equality.blogspot.com/p/discredited-invalid-arguments.html


Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #2

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #4
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Thursday, April 30, 2015

NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #2


“It goes against tradition.” So did the abolition of slavery. In reality, (adult) intergenerational, interracial marriages, same-gender marriages, polygamous or polyamorous marriages, and consanguineous marriages are nothing new. Some of these were entered into by prominent religious leaders and historical royalty. Regardless, a tradition of inequality is not a justification for continuing to deny equality.

There is no good reason to deny an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race or religion, the right to share love, sex, residence, and marriage (or any of those without the others) with any and all consenting adults without prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.

Feel free to share, copy and paste, and otherwise distribute. This has been adapted from this page at Full Marriage Equality: http://marriage-equality.blogspot.com/p/discredited-invalid-arguments.html

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #1

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #3 
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Wednesday, April 29, 2015

More Marriages

At mbhs.edu Nicholas Shereiki wrote "An in-depth look at why we should legalize polygamy."
The big issue here is that the reasoning behind outlawing polygamy is flawed. Polygamy is illegal because, essentially, people find it morally abhorrent or unnatural.
Some people do invoke Discredited Arguments 4 and 5.
From a biological perspective, our commitment to monogamy as a species is questionable. Out of the roughly 5,000 species of mammal, only three to five percent are monogamous - and of those, most commit so intensely to their partner that they will not mate again even if their mate is killed. The human commitment to monogamy is nowhere near as serious, as evidenced by the number of people who remarry after divorce or a spouse's death.
Very few people have only one spouse or partner over their lifetime.
Yet in the United States, monogamy is enforced by law with criminal adultery statutes, laws against bigamy and child custody laws. While prosecutions pertaining to violations of these laws are rare, statutory penalties against these crimes range from two years' imprisonment to commitment for treatment of insanity.
Bigamy should only be a crime if done as a fraud. Having multiple spouses who have agreed to the situation should not be a crime. It should be legalized. There is no good reason to deny that an adult, regardless of orientation, gender, race, or religion, should be free to share love, sex, residence, and marriage (and any of those without the others) with any and all consenting adults, without prosecution, bullying, or discrimination. Let's keep the momentum going.


The writer make several references to the same-gender freedom to marry and cites an opinion from a gay writer. It is important to note that, just like everyone else, there are LGBT people who are polyamorous or polygamous, some who aren't but support the polygamous freedom to marry, and some who are against the polygamous freedom to marry.



Lies and Damned Lies About Polygamy
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Lies and Damned Lies About Polygamy

[Note: I am bumping up this previous entry because it is as relevant as ever. Polygamy is not something to escape from, fear, or prosecute. Abusive people are. Polygamy doesn't harm women, children, or teen boys, abusers do. The same goes for monogamy.]

Good ol’ tool of anti-equality forces, Professor Joe Henrich of the University of B.C., is back in the news. This article comes with a picture of Bountiful, B.C. (which is NOT the picture shown here) along with this text…

New research says that polygamy, which is practiced in Bountiful, B.C., leads to increased crime.

Right. Everyone avoids driving near Bountiful because of the high crime rate.

Prof. Joe Henrich found that when rich men take more than one wife, it leaves a deficit of women leading to increased fighting and competition for the remaining women.

Got that? You non-wealthy or unmarried guys are just a bunch of criminals.

Henrich is taking about women as though they have no minds of their own and are nothing but property, akin to cars.

Rich men can “take” more than one woman, marriage or not. Shall we ban all nonmonogamy? Or, since it might lower the crime rate according to this line of thinking, shall we require a woman to find an unmarried man and keep him busy so he won’t go around being a violent criminal?

"You have low-status men who are desperate for resources," said Henrich, a professor in the departments of psychology and economics. "More polygamy leads to a greater proportion of unmarried men, which leads to increased crime."

How does Henrich explain “low status” men who marry a woman and support her decision to not earn income as she tends to the children or earn less income than she and their children will spend? Wouldn’t it make sense, in Henrich’s view, for such men to never marry and have children, so as to be less “desperate for resources?”

Henrich and his co-authors studied societies where polygamy is prevalent, trying to discover the consequences.

Did they also conclude that polygamy causes high amounts of melanin?
"The scarcity of marriageable women in polygamous cultures increases competition among men for the remaining unmarried women," said Henrich. "The greater competition increases the likelihood men in polygamous communities will resort to criminal behaviour to gain resources and women."

I wonder why the article doesn’t cite examples?

I also wonder how much funding for this, or how much of Henrich’s pay, comes from the very government that has banned the polygamous freedom to marry and is actively attacking polygynous families?

We’ve already debunked all of this here, here, here, here, here, and here. We will need many more dung beetles to clear this pile up.

An adult should be free to share love, sex, residence, and marriage with any and all consenting adults. These excuses to deny full marriage equality are flimsy masks that fail to hide festering bigotry.
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Tuesday, April 28, 2015

NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #1


“It is disgusting.” Also known as the “ick” or “eww” factor, this explains why the person using the argument would not want to enter into the type of relationship or marriage or have the kind sex they want banned, but their own personal disgust is not a justification for preventing other people from doing something those other people want to do. Don’t want to have an (adult) intergenerational or interracial or same-gender or polyamorous or consanguineous marriage? Don’t have one. Some people are disgusted by the idea of heterosexual sex, or their parents having sex, but obviously this is not a justification to ban those things. Some people find prejudice and bigotry, a lack of marriage equality, disgusting. Meanwhile, the people in these relationships aren’t digusted. How they love each other should be be up to them.

There is no good reason to deny an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race or religion, the right to share love, sex, residence, and marriage (or any of those without the others) with any and all consenting adults without prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.

Feel free to share, copy and paste, and otherwise distribute. This has been adapted from this page at Full Marriage Equality: http://marriage-equality.blogspot.com/p/discredited-invalid-arguments.html

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #2
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Monday, April 27, 2015

Will the U.S. Supreme Court Rule For Nationwide Equality?


On Tuesday, April 27, the U.S. Supreme Court will hear arguments about several cases involving marriage laws. Here are some facts about this.

The Court has received many written arguments. What they will be hearing are oral arguments, which they can challenge and interrupt. A decision will not be made public until June.

What it boils down to is that many federal courts have told states they 1) must stop denying the limited monogamous freedom to marry to same-gender couples, and they 2) have to recognize such marriages legally entered into in other states. Some states have appealed those rulings to the Supreme Court.

There are different decisions the Court could make.

The worst-case scenario that is within the realm of possibility is that the Court will say that states may continue to have laws that deny this freedom to marry and deny recognition of such marriages entered into elsewhere. This is not likely.

It is very likely that progress will be made at the Court. The question really is how much progress. It would be a dream come true to see the Court rule for the nationwide right to full marriage equality. We should finally make it clear that an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race, or religion, is free to marry any and all consenting adults.

That, however, is a longshot. The next best thing, and it is far more likely to happen, is for the court to rule that there is a nationwide right to the limited monogamous same-gender freedom to marry, and to do so in a way that will allow full marriage equality to be implemented within a few years.

Lawrence vs. Texas was decided in 2003, which struck down laws against "sodomy." Here, twelve years later, people in relationships that used to be criminalized may get their right to marry. So progress is being made, and it is being made faster and faster, thankfully.

People are being hurt as a result of being denied their rights. The Court can help end that. There is no good reason they shouldn't. Let's stand up for the rights of all!


See The US Supreme Court Should Rule For Equality










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