Sunday, September 21, 2014

A Polyamorous Mother Denied Her Rights

This is the thirty-eighth ongoing relationship I've covered through exclusive interviews in which the lovers are denied the freedom to be open about their love and are, by law, denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law.

The woman the interview below is a responsible adult, someone you might live next to or work with, in consensual relationships with other adults. Yet they face discrimination and prejudice for their love, having to hide the truth. They are clearly intelligent, responsible people and it is cruel to discriminate against them or deny them their rights.

Read the interview below and ask yourself if there is one good reason why people like this person,  should be denied the right to marry all of the consenting adults she love and have their marriages treated equally under the law or should have to hide the full, true nature of their relationship from anyone.


FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Describe your background.

Rhian Ruari: I'm a college educated Demisexual bi-romantic white cis-woman in her 30s.  I work in education.  I write, read, bike, cook and watch DVDs with my loved ones, and making things with my kids.  I love being productive, work more than I should, and I love scheduling and organizing, planning and driving.  I live on the west coast in a house with H and W and our children, G and B.

H is a grad-level educated cishet Latino man in his mid 30s.  He's a scientist, who loves to read,  hike, bike and other random outdoors activities. 

W is in his mid-twenties, is a white cis male who is bi-romantic and mostly heterosexual.  He bikes, cooks, gardens, reads, loves the outdoors and likes dating.

FME: Are you legally married or have you ever been legally married?

H and I are legally married,  and have been for about a decade and a half...together for longer.  W has never been legally attached to anyone (although we have power of attorney papers) and M (H's white cishet girlfriend) has also never been married or legally partnered.  W short-hands our relationship as married, though...and we've talked about how nice having some sort of ceremony would be.

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Have a Look Around

Are you new to this blog? Maybe you've been here before, but have missed some of the features here.

Over there in the column on the right you can find ways to connect and to follow this blog.

There at the top of the page are tabs with drop-downs of some important pages, entries, and links.

There's a Welcome message and there's an About This Blog page, and you can read about the triad that originally inspired this blog.

There's a Glossary so that you can become familiar with terms frequently used here.

I explain why we need solidarity in supporting full marriage equality and I debunk all the arguments that you'll ever hear made against equality.

On the Case Studies page I feature interviews with people who have been denied their rights, so you can "meet" people who are, or have been, in consensual loving relationships who have are harmed by the lack of equality under the law.

Are you here because of polyamory or polygamy? Perhaps you're here because this blog covers Genetic Sexual Attraction or consanguinamory (consensual incest)? Do you need help?

Whether you're a family member or friend who is looking for more information, or a journalist, or are someone who is looking to help the cause, I hope you are helped by what is here.

This blog is a labor of love. There's no advertising and we don't accept monetary contributions. Want to help? Spread the word. Also, this blog DOES accept content submissions (fullmarriageequality at yahoo dot com), but makes no offer, implicit nor explicit, of compensation nor guarantees that it will be used.

A very kind person improved this blog's template. I hope you are liking the new look. I still need to take care of a couple of things.

Tell me what you think!
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Saturday, September 20, 2014

Facebook and Twitter and More

Have you joined the Facebook group yet? Join "I Support Full Marriage Equality."

You should also like this page, Full Marriage Equality, and we meant that.

Are we Facebook friends? I want to be friends with all who support full marriage equality and relationship rights for all adults. Here I am.

Are we connected on Twitter? Here I am.

Are we connected on Tumblr? Here I am.

If you don't want to connect, still feel free to send me a note. I can be reached at fullmarriageequality at yahoo dot com

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Friday, September 19, 2014

The US Supreme Court Should Rule for Equality

In June 2013, the US Supreme Court took baby steps forward towards full marriage equality. Since then, state and federal courts and the Obama Administration have been taking more steps forward. But there is still a long way to go and still wasteful resistance to progress.

There have been one or two bumps in the courtroom progress, but for the most part, the courts have been moving this issue forward

The Court should consolidate and consider many federal cases now in the system. We want the US Supreme Court to make the best possible ruling, which is to recognize relationship rights, including full marriage equality, for all adults nationwide.

The Court should rule that…

An adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race, or religion, should be free to share love, sex, residence, and marriage with any and all consenting adults, without prosecution, harassment, or discrimination.

There are many reasons why the Court should do this.
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Thursday, September 18, 2014

A Thriving Young Woman Despite Discrimination Against Her Mother

I've profiled dozens of ongoing relationships through exclusive interviews in which the lovers are denied the freedom to be open about their love and are, by law, denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law. However, I'd been missing opportunities to further inform visitors to my blog, as pointed out by some Friends of Full Marriage Equality. So now, in addition to seeking interviews with the lovers themselves, I am also asking for friends and family of such lovers for interviews.

The inaugural interview of this new series is below, and features a remarkably well-spoken young woman whose life was impacted negatively by discrimination against her mother's consensual relationship. Fortunately, as you'll read, things weren't nearly as bad as they could have been, especially when it comes to a prior relationship her mother had, the one that birthed the interviewee.

Read the interview below and ask yourself who hurt her... her mother or the people who persecuted her mother?


FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Describe yourself and your background.

Anonymous Woman: I’m 20 years old, Eurasian and an atheist. I live with my partner of six years and have olive skin and tattoos. I’m roughly around 165cms tall and I’m the oldest child in my family. When I’m not working as a waitress, I love to spend my time outdoors being active and staying physically fit or playing PlayStation inside. I've been home-schooled all my life and enjoy mixing with people from all walks of life. I’m extremely accepting and love nothing more than to learn and soak up as much knowledge as I can.

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Wednesday, September 17, 2014

NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #2

“It goes against tradition.” So did the abolition of slavery. In reality, (adult) intergenerational, interracial marriages, same-gender marriages, polygamous or polyamorous marriages, and consanguineous marriages are nothing new. Some of these were entered into by prominent religious leaders and historical royalty. Regardless, a tradition of inequality is not a justification for continuing to deny equality.

There is no good reason to deny an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race or religion, the right to share love, sex, residence, and marriage (or any of those without the others) with any and all consenting adults without prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.

Feel free to share, copy and paste, and otherwise distribute. This has been adapted from this page at Full Marriage Equality:

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #1

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #3 
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Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Tell Your Story

Are you, or have you ever been, in a “forbidden” consensual relationship?

Is one of your parents, children, or other family members in such a relationship, or have they been?

Are you the adult child of such a relationship, whether you were a biological child, adopted, or stepchild?

If you can say "yes" to one or more of those questions, I’d like to interview you. It doesn’t matter if the relationship is/was very casual, is a serious lifelong relationship, or somewhere between.

What qualifies as “forbidden?” While most of my interviews printed on the blog so far have been with people in consanguinamorous (consensual incest) relationships, I’m also interested in any consensual adult relationships that are forbidden by law, custom, tradition, community, or family and/or is subject to discrimination. This includes, but isn’t necessarily limited to, relationships with someone who is from an older or younger (adult) generation, or from a different race; gay or lesbian relationships; open relationships or marriages, relationships that include swinging, swapping, group, or polyamorous relationships; polygamous relationships or marriages, plural marriages, polyandry, or polygyny; and relationships often perceived as incestuous, such as between cousins, or Genetic Sexual Attraction relationships, or being with a close blood, step, adoptive, or in-law relative.

I’d like to interview you and publish the interview on my blog, and I can do so while protecting your anonymity.

What you get in return:

1. Loads of cash. Well, no, not really. I don’t accept funding for this blog and I won’t pay for participation. Sorry. This blog is a labor of love in every sense of the word. Also, I want people wjp just want to sincerely share their experiences, not someone who is will sensationalize for cash.

2. The satisfaction of knowing you are making a difference in the lives of many people around the world. People are relieved to read of other experiences like their own, and those who wonder about these relationships come away a little more enlightened.

3. Being able to tell of your relationship and experiences to someone who supports your rights and respects you.

4. A link to a website or profile of yours, depending on privacy issues.

The best way to contact me is via email. Check the Get Connected tab at the top of the screen.
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Has Your Partner Experienced Consanguinamory?

I used be active at a certain Big Internet Portal's Question and Answer service, until someone who couldn’t handle me answering questions truthfully when it comes to certain romantic or sexual topics decided to get me "suspended" using a weakness in their automated system. After that, I'd still check to see what questions were being asked there, even though I couldn't participate in any way or even contact anyone there unless they had somehow provided an email address in their question or answer. I will not link to the service, but I will quote it. Someone named Lauren asked this question...

Ok.....complicated one, recently found out my husband and his younger sister had sex for a number of years between the ages of 10-12, this is what he's telling me tho I'm aware this may have more to it? We are a young couple married with two children (boys) my relationship with his family has never been great and this hasn't helped! Can anyone give me any advice or your thoughts on how you would deal with this news? I'm up and down and so confused.....

Questions like this come up more than people might think. Person A is dating or married to Person B and Person A suspects or has found out that Person B has been sexually involved with a sibling or other family member. Person A usually wants to know what they should do.

It is important to clarify the situation by determining the answers to some questions.

1) Is this something that is suspected or has it been confirmed?

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Monday, September 15, 2014

Ever Wanted to Be In a Documentary?

Or maybe just help the documentary production research? There's a company called Clover Films that is looking for "alternative" relationships, including nonmonogamous or polyamorous, or consanguineous relationships. Someone there contacted me and wrote...
I am currently researching a documentary series for an international broadcaster around the subject of marriage equality rights and the struggles of people in alternative relationships across different societies and cultures worldwide. 
Clover Films is an international award winning documentary company, including 2 Emmys. One of our recent titles includes Transgenders: Pakistan's Open Secret. We explored the relationship between the transgender community in Karachi, Pakistan and Pakistani society. This film was selected by the UNAFF (United Nations Association Film Festival) and had a tremendous response when broadcast. 
We are not aiming to produce a tactless voyeuristic documentary series. We look at tough-to-tackle subjects and put them into the respective cultural context they deserve. There are many complex and complicated questions, and the entire series will be developed to address some of the misconceptions about these issues.
I asked about protecting identities of people who are closeted, and was provided with more information...
If you get a chance, check out our website. You'll see we're always working with people whose identities we must conceal through blurring and voice recognition: Taliban fighters, witnesses to crimes, abused children, etc. One of the reasons we are so respected and get such access is because we devote a lot of time and resources to ensure anonymity for people who need it. It would be irresponsible not to be dedicated to that, first and foremost. Please know we completely understand and respect you for also doing the same. 
That being said, should any participants feel that they want to appear openly, documentary films do have more impact when people can identify with those taking part. We would always work together with our participants and broadcasters to ensure that the right decision is made. On our most recent film in Pakistan, we worked incredibly closely with the broadcaster lawyers to protect the participants of our film.
This isn't a casting call. We're looking to make a serious documentary series, not a voyeuristic reality show. 
Please assure your contacts that Clover is a serious production company that has worked with the BBC, Al Jazeera, PBS FRONTLINE and many, many more channels internationally.
So, if you're interested, follow the link at the top of the entry to make contact. When these things are done right, they can open minds and hearts.
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Banking on Love

By my count, this is the thirty-seventh ongoing relationship I've covered through exclusive interviews in which the lovers are denied the freedom to be open about their love and are, by law, denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law. (Read the interview and you'll see how they decided to work around this.)

The man in the interview below is a responsible adult, someone you might live next to or work with, in a consensual relationship with another adult. Yet they face discrimination and prejudice for their love, having to hide the truth. They are very much in love and it is cruel to discriminate against them or criminalize their relationship.

Read the interview below and ask yourself if there is one good reason why people like this person, going under the name "Ranger," should be denied the right to marry and have their marriages treated equally under the law or should have to hide the full, true nature of their relationship from anyone.


FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Tell us about yourself.

Ranger: I am a 28 year old banker, living in Canada, originally from India. My looks are average and so is the built. I have only one younger sister who is two years younger than me, who is now my wife. She is extraordinarily good-looking.

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Sunday, September 14, 2014

Search Phrase of the Day

People find this blog through various paths, especially some interesting searches. Here is one that definitely makes sense for arriving at this blog...
Is it wrong if I want to seduce my dad
My short answer is that wanting to seduce your dad is never wrong. Your attractions are yours, and you have your feelings for whatever reason. It is not such a rare fantasy. Also, actually taking action to seduce your father, provided you are an adult yourself, would only be wrong if it was intended to cause some harm (get him arrested, for example) or if it would involve you or him violating intact vows or agreements with others in a way that would be kept secret. It is also a bad idea if you're completely wrong for each other (for example, he wants to reserve sex for a serious ongoing relationship, and you just want a fling.)

There are many women out there who have seduced their father.

If you want to know how to go about doing it, much of what I wrote here, about seducing a mother, applies.

The good news is, as long as you are a gender to which your father is attracted, it is generally easier to seduce a father than it is a mother, but that is a broad generalization. One reason is that it is easier to tell if a man is getting aroused. Also, while it isn't a good tactic to seduce a mother by exposing yourself, exposed skin may be of assistance in seducing a father.

In sex-negative circles, fathers are tasked with denying the sexuality of even their grown children, so a father may be resistant to give in to seduction on this basis. Reassuring him that he's done nothing wrong and this is something you want can help.
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Saturday, September 13, 2014

Documentary Production Needs Funding

If you support full marriage equality, there are many ways to help the cause. One of the ways is raising awareness. Even informative documentaries that take a neutral stance can help because the more that people see relationships that are discriminated against consist of real people who are hurt by prejudice, the better. I’ve previously passed along calls for interview or documentary subjects (see this recent posting, for example) but now I’m passing along an opportunity to provide funding for a new documentary.

Jan-Willem Breure, a Dutch director, is currently working on documentary about consanguinamory, and it will challenge the “incest taboo.” Please note this is not a documentary about abuse or molestation. This is about sex, or to be redundant, consensual sex.

A previous documentary by Breure won the Dutch Media Prize for Best Documentary of the Year, so he is not some inexperienced, unknown character. He’s looking for donors who can provide amounts small as well as large.

Here is the website:

There is a trailer available to give you an idea of the production. If you want to see it, email Breure or you can contact me a fullmarriagequality at yahoo dot com

Documentaries and other media should not ignore this subject or treat it with a negative bias. Here’s a chance to help, if you’re so inclined.

And, as always, if you're in a "forbidden" relationship and want to be interviewed for this blog like dozens of others have been, contact me.

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