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Sunday, August 31, 2014

Facebook and Twitter and More

Have you joined the Facebook group yet? Join "I Support Full Marriage Equality."

You should also like this page, Full Marriage Equality, and we meant that.

Are we Facebook friends? I want to be friends with all who support full marriage equality and relationship rights for all adults. Here I am.

Are we connected on Twitter? Here I am.

Are we connected on Tumblr? Here I am.

If you don't want to connect, still feel free to send me a note. I can be reached at fullmarriageequality at yahoo dot com

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Saturday, August 30, 2014

Consanguinamory FAQ

I have a page here (see those tabs up at the top?) to answer frequently asked questions about consanguinamory and other forms of consensual incest and consanguineous sex.

Feel free to submit more questions to me (I take comments), link to the page, quote from the page, copy and paste... whatever... just as long as you tell people where you got it (link to me.)
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Friday, August 29, 2014

Discovering Consanguinamory in the Family Tree

I am [or, had been] active on [a certain Big Online Portal's question and answer service], especially when it comes to explaining the importance of relationship rights, full marriage equality, and decriminalizing consanguinamory. Someone had this question...

Family Tree Concerns..?
My Grandfather recently passed away and my Grandmother told us all that her and my Grandfather were never married, they had always celebrated an anniversary (or so we thought,) but didn't understand while she waited till he died before telling us. After further research into my family tree I have discovered that my Grandmother married her Uncle (is this incest!?!), my Mother feels all weird because it feels like her life has been a lie and the only person she could have asked and got a proper answer was her Dad but now he's gone so we are both just looking for some advice or if anyone has been or is going through a similar situation...
This was my answer, which was chosen as the best answer (thankyouverymuch)...
= = = =
Here's what matters: Was your grandfather a good person? A good spouse to your Grandmother? A good parent? A good grandparent? THAT is what matters, not any genetic or legal relation to your grandmother. There's no lie about any of that. Your mother's life is no different now than it was before she knew that information. She's just allowing cultural prejudices to influence her reaction. Your grandparents had what is called a common-law marriage. As long as they were good to each other, that is what matters.

You didn't make it clear, but it appears you mean your grandfather was the brother of one of your grandmother's parents (he would still be an "uncle" to her if he had, at one time, been married to one of your grandmother's parents' sisters without any biological relation to your grandmother). Assuming there was a genetic connection (though it is possible he had been adopted into the family, too), that is still no reason for alarm. This is much more common than people think. People are finding out about this through DNA testing and family records, although family records don't always reveal the truth. If you go back further, it is virtually guaranteed you'll find you have consanguineous ancestors.

You don't have to go too far back in anyone's family tree to find these kinds of things. I doubt there is a person out there whose ancestry has nothing like this.

In other words.... you and your family are as normal as everyone else.
= = =

Just about everyone has incestuous childbearing in their family tree. In some cases, someone was raped, which of course is a horrible,  or there was cheating. In other cases, it was true love between people who were not cheating on anyone. If the law prevented them from legally marrying or from telling the truth, that is a problem, a terrible problem, of the law, and just one of many reasons we need full marriage equality. It is not something wrong with the lovers.
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Thursday, August 28, 2014

Georgia Still Prosecuting Consenting Adults

Most siblings who enjoy consanguinamory are never arrested or prosecuted for doing so, because they are never "caught" or outed to hostile or power-hungry strangers. I look forward to the day that they don't have to hide who they are or who they love. However, as long as most US states still have absurd laws against such consensual sex, it is a good idea for people to protect themselves.

There is news out of the US state of Georgia that siblings were arrested for having sex with each other. Their names and pictures are being published in several news outlets. Here's the report from G.G. Rigsby at savannahnow.com...
A brother and sister were arrested this morning in Effingham County and accused of having sex with each other in a tractor trailer parked at a church.

Christopher Buckner, 20, of Guyton, and her brother, Timothy Savoy, 25, of Jackson, Ga., were arrested and charged with incest, aggravated sodomy and prowling, according to Sheriff’s Office spokesman David Ehsanipoor.
Out of those three, only "prowling" should be a crime.
The spokesman said deputies answered a call at about 4:30 a.m. about a prowler in the area of Hester Road and Ga. 30.

As deputies were checking the area, they saw a man and woman walking down the road. The male said he was walking the female back to her house.

Deputies determined that the pair were brother and sister and that they had just had sex in a Kenworth tractor trailer, which was parked at Countryside Baptist Church, Ehsanipoor said.

He said they admitted having sex three times after watching the movie, “The Notebook.”
I wonder if the deputies would have been able to "determine" that they'd just had sex without the admission? Folks, it is risky to have sex on someone else's property if you don't think they'd approve. And, in America, we have the right to remain silent. USE THAT RIGHT. Never admit to committing a victimless "crime" even if it seems obvious that you did.
They were being held in the Effingham County jail.
Really? What kind of threat are they to anyone? How absurd.

A comment after the story asked the tired old question...
if a child was conceived will it be their son or daughter and niece or nephew?
What really matters is if a child is being raised by loving adults. To answer the question though, some children are raised in such situations and know their mother and father as such. Some children are raised by their mother or father unaware that their uncle or aunt is their father or mother.

Another comment..
...throwing them in jail at taxpayers expense does not seem to be an intelligent response.
 Thank you!

Another comment...
Do we not have more important issues for police to address than this.. Yes- it's wrong, stupid and certainly not within any sort of civilized behavior.. but jail? Nah-
Uh, thanks... I guess.
It was clarified elsewhere that they are half-siblings. I wonder if this is a Genetic Sexual Attraction situation? See, for example, this report at wsav.com...


The Effingham County Sheriff's Office says 20-year-old Christopher Buckner of Guyton and her half-brother, 25-year-old Timothy Savoy of Jackson have been arrested and charged with incest after they admitted to having sex.
This really shouldn't have been a criminal matter for the newspapers. The real news here is that adults are being charged with a crime for having consensual sex. The police should have told them not to fool around on church property and let them go. What a waste of resources.
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Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Why? Many of the Same Reasons Anyone Else Does It

Vicky Wireko wrote at myjoyonline.com under "Reality Zone: Why would a father sleep with his biological daughter?"

Without yet getting to the text of the piece, the terms need to be defined. By "sleep," she no doubt means intercourse. But is she referring to rape or is she referring to consensual sex?  Rape and lovemaking are two different things. Rape should always be illegal. Lovemaking should never be illegal. But "biological daughter" can mean a woman the father didn't meet or didn't have a relationship with until she was an adult, or at least hasn't had a relationship with since an early age. Consanguinamory initiated through Genetic Sexual Attraction has a different dynamic than consanguinamory growing from an existing sociological relationship.

Why would a father make love with his biological daughter? I'm talking about CONSENT ADULTS here.

For many of the the same reasons a man would have sex with any woman:

He's a heterosexual male and she's a receptive or initiating female he finds attractive.

They love each other.

It feels good and is fun. This is especially true when it comes to consanguinamory.

To bond.

To express love.

To have children.

Some of them have been brought together through Genetic Sexual Attraction, some of them haven't.

There are many reasons, but they shouldn't need to justify it to anyone else. Why is ultimately theirs to share, not anyone else's business. Perhaps a better question is why wouldn't/shouldn't he? Sex is not a bad thing. Those who think it is are probably doing it wrong.

What did Wireko have to say? Let's see...

Everything is certainly wrong with a father sleeping with his blood daughter.
 Does she give a reason?
It is repugnant apart from the fact that it is a taboo in our custom.
Ah, Discredited Arguments #1 and 2.

However, when a father’s love for his daughter straddles beyond parental love veering off to lust, to the extent of sexual abuse, it becomes horrendous.
Abuse and lovemaking are two different things. She goes on to write about abuse, without giving a good reason as to why consenting adults shouldn't be free to share love, sex, residence, and marriage. Don't like it? Don't do it. But there ARE adult women in loving spousal-type relationships with their biological fathers, despite what prejudiced bigots think.

Please also see Intergenerational Relationships Can Work 



why would a woman sleep with her father why would a father and daughter have sex why would a parent have sex with an adult child why would a woman have sex with her father
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Tuesday, August 26, 2014

A Treasured Love From Her Perspective

With most of the interviews I do, I’m fortunate just to get one of the lovers to put their time and thoughts into answering my questions. Sometimes I get both/everyone involved to give an interview. This is the first time that I can recall the other lover in a couple, after initially declining, overcoming her shyness and doing a separate interview after seeing her lover’s interview published.

They are a lovely couple both in appearance and interaction.

My previous interview can be found here. That was with the man in this heterosexual coupling, assuming the name "Billy Lee Black." Below is interview with the woman, “Blaze Fielding.”


Read the interview below and ask yourself if there is one good reason this person should be denied her right to marry and have her marriage treated equally under the law or should have to hide the full, true nature of her relationship from anyone.


*****

FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Describe yourself.

Blaze Fielding: I’m a female in my early twenties, 5’7”, green eyes, brown hair, and average build. I’ve had several jobs, mostly cashier/retail assistant work. I’m now doing part-time cleaning, although I did animal care courses at college and am seeking employment in that area. I have three siblings; two on my mum’s side and one on my dad’s side, who is my older half-brother that I am in a relationship with. I have a son from a previous relationship, as does my partner. We live in the UK, where it’s illegal here to have an intimate relationship with a relative or in-laws.


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Monday, August 25, 2014

Frequently Asked Question: How Common is Incest?

The short answer: Nobody knows for sure, but it appears to be common enough that you know someone who has been involved, whether you know it or not. If you have been, are, or want to be involved, you are not alone and it doesn’t make you bad or sick. You’re in the company of royals and peasants, urban dwellers and rural folk, the wealthy and the poor throughout history. Regardless, rights are not reserved for the majority.

This answer is addressing consensual incest, in which I include, in addition to adults, minors who four years or less apart in age when force or coercion are not used. This is what I call “consanguinamory” or consanguineous sex. This answer is not about child molestation, sexual assault, or rape.

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Saturday, August 23, 2014

Update on Nebraska Prosecution of GSA Teens

There's been an update to a Genetic Sexual Attraction situation we last blogged about in June. The travesty of justice continues. Here's the report from theindependent.com...
A 19-year-old Nebraska man who faced a felony incest charge has taken a plea deal.
The man pleaded no contest to a lesser felony charge of attempted incest on Tuesday. He had been charged with felony incest.

He shouldn't have been prosecuted at all!
16-year-old girl tells police her mother attempted to strangle her with a coat hanger after learning she was pregnant with her half brother's child.
No word at all on whether or not the mother will be prosecuted for assault or attempted murder.
She tells officers the relationship was consensual.

Yet they prosecuted anyway. Would they have done that if a DNA test revealed no close relation?
The girl was placed into state custody. She had been charged in juvenile court with incest but those charges were dismissed Tuesday.

Well, that's some good news at least. The Associated Press didn't give any names, but some news outlets did. For example there's panhandlepost.com.

Nebraska taxpayers should be furious that their tax dollars are being wasted to violate rights.
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Friday, August 22, 2014

Documentary Production Needs Funding

If you support full marriage equality, there are many ways to help the cause. One of the ways is raising awareness. Even informative documentaries that take a neutral stance can help because the more that people see relationships that are discriminated against consist of real people who are hurt by prejudice, the better. I’ve previously passed along calls for interview or documentary subjects (see this recent posting, for example) but now I’m passing along an opportunity to provide funding for a new documentary.

Jan-Willem Breure, a Dutch director, is currently working on documentary about consanguinamory, and it will challenge the “incest taboo.” Please note this is not a documentary about abuse or molestation. This is about sex, or to be redundant, consensual sex.

A previous documentary by Breure won the Dutch Media Prize for Best Documentary of the Year, so he is not some inexperienced, unknown character. He’s looking for donors who can provide amounts small as well as large.

Here is the website:

www.jw-productions.com

There is a trailer available to give you an idea of the production. If you want to see it, email Breure or you can contact me a fullmarriagequality at yahoo dot com

Documentaries and other media should not ignore this subject or treat it with a negative bias. Here’s a chance to help, if you’re so inclined.

And, as always, if you're in a "forbidden" relationship and want to be interviewed for this blog like dozens of others have been, contact me.



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Thursday, August 21, 2014

Consanguineous Marriage and the Modern Saudi

The Saudi Gazette recently ran an article about Saudis continuing to prefer consanguineous marriages.

The article starts off with the genetics scare tactic.
According to Ahmed Qassim Al-Ghamdi, the former head of the Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice, awareness among Saudis of hereditary disease in children and their relationship to marriages between relatives has increased due to the progress made in scientific research. Al-Ghamdi, however, said many of the risks have been exaggerated and urged couples to undergo premarital blood testing.

“Scientific studies have proven that there is an increase in risk of affliction with certain hereditary diseases among children born from marriages between close relatives. The studies have proven a high probability of the husband and wife carrying the same genes if they are relatives. Hence, this increases the probability of their children carrying a gene for a rare disease. However, this does not necessarily mean that every related couple’s child will be born with hereditary disease,” he said.

The article gets into religion...
“The belief that marriage between relatives in itself increases hereditary diseases in children is an exaggerated belief. Islam has permitted marriage between relatives. The Prophet (peace be upon him) married his daughter Fatima to his cousin Ali Bin Abi Talib (may Allah be pleased with him). The companions of the Prophet followed the same path. This is widespread in Arab societies even though it has a role in the appearance of some hereditary diseases. At the same time, it causes the appearance of some good characteristics. The moderate view is to take precautions by undergoing premarital blood testing,” he added.

I think it is a good idea for anyone planning to have their own genetic children to look into their risks.
Educational consultant Dr. Shaker Al-Hukair said one cannot issue an absolute judgment in favor or against consanguineous unions especially since many Saudis support such unions due to several reasons.

“The most important among these reasons is to follow what happened during the era of the Prophet (pbuh) as he married his daughter Fatima to his cousin Ali Bin Abi Talib (may Allah be pleased with him). Marriage between relatives strengthens the bonds of kinship, aside from boosting the bonds of intermarriage. A husband and wife need a lot of wisdom in dealing with their marital differences and even in the case of separation, the bonds of kinship and kindness remain. Despite the disadvantages of marriage between relatives, I still believe that the advantages exceed the disadvantages. The previously mentioned matters are a sufficient reason for supporting marriage between relatives,” he said.
Marriages to cousins, cousins-once-removed, second cousins, etc. has a long history around the world. It is ridiculous that any country or any US state discriminate against or ban such marriages. It's good to see support in Saudi Arabia. Now if we could just get the Saudis moving forward with things like gender equality, polyamory, polyandry, and LGBT rights!
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Clearing Up Consanguinity

Many people get confused about terms like "second cousins" and "once removed" when referring to close but not-so-close relations. Your parent's sibling's child is your first cousin. That person's child would be your first cousin, once removed. That person's child and your child would be second cousins.

Here's a helpful chart that can help explain it.



Source: http://www.sanantonio.gov/atty/ethics/ConsanguinityChart.htm

Remember, there's nothing wrong with experimenting with, dating, or even marrying a cousin. Consanguineous relationships and marriages are nothing new. There are some countries and a little over half of US states where the bigotry against marriage equality extends to preventing first cousins from marrying, but there are many places where marrying a first cousin is legal and common. I'm only aware of a few US states where sex between first cousins is technically illegal, so check the laws of your state if you are concerned. It should be searchable on your official state website.


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