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Tuesday, August 30, 2022

Sons and the Mothers Who Raised Them

Anonymous asked at this blog's sister Tumblr...

Is it possible for a son to be attracted to his mother and fantasize about her even though he grew up with her? Without the westermark effect?

Yes.

This happens quite frequently. You no doubt know multiple sons who have or had such feelings. And you almost certainly know some who’ve acted on them.

Not everyone experiences the Westermarck Effect with all people they were raised with. Sometimes the effect is very weak in comparison to their attraction. Also, some people are primarily consanguinamorous in their orientation.

Whether the woman who raised him is his biological mother, stepmother, adoptive mother, grandmother, aunt, etc., it happens.

It also happens to daughters who have attraction to women. And sons who are attracted to men might experience attraction to their father. And daughters who are attracted to men might experience attraction to their father.

In reunion/introduction Genetic Sexual Attraction situations, there was never any chance for the Westermarck Effect to be a factor. But when raised with or by someone, it still might not be present, or might not be strong enough to override attraction.

If you're experiencing such feelings and need to talk with someone, contact Keith.
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Saturday, August 27, 2022

Basic Facts About Sex

Based on some of the people who reach out to me, various places on this planet have an appalling lack of sex education. 

That is why I am posting this.

Others have already made basic information about sex accessible online, so I will be linking to them. But there are few things I wanted to stress below.

First, a couple of important links that can answer many questions.

WebMD Health and Sex Guide

Scarleteen


Spend time looking for answers to your questions at those links.

Now, some important things everyone should know...
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Monday, August 15, 2022

I Enjoy Hearing From You

Over the years, thousands of people have reached out to me (Keith). I very much enjoy hearing from everyone (except the haters... although their lack of reason can be entertaining). Unfortunately, I often rely on the people who contact me to keep the conversations going, because there is one of me and many of you. Please don't hesitate to contact me, even just to say hello, even if it has been years since we communicated. 

Maybe you've been visiting this blog for years, maybe you're new, maybe you haven't ever reached out to me before. Please do! You're welcome to write to me, whether it is just to say hello, or ask a question, or update me on your life, or to tell me about yourself.

I never share what someone tells me privately with anyone else, unless they give me permission, so don't be shy.

Thanks!

Here are some of the ways to reach me.

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Thursday, August 11, 2022

Raksha Bandhan

One of my readers called my attention to Raksha Bandhan

According to the current Wikipedia entry as of this posting, it...

is a popular and traditionally Hindu annual rite or ceremony that is central to a festival of the same name celebrated in South Asia. It is also celebrated in other parts of the world significantly influenced by Hindu culture. On this day, sisters of all ages tie a talisman or amulet called the Rakhi around the wrists of their brothers. They symbolically protect them, receive a gift in return, and traditionally invest the brothers with a share of the responsibility of their potential care.

Raksha Bandhan is observed on the last day of the Hindu lunar calendar month of Shraavana, which typically falls in August. The expression "Raksha Bandhan" (Sanskrit, literally, "the bond of protection, obligation, or care,") is now principally applied to this ritual. Until the mid-20th century, the expression was more commonly applied to a similar ritual, also held on the same day, with precedence in ancient Hindu texts. In that ritual, a domestic priest ties amulets, charms, or threads on the wrists of his patrons, or changes their sacred thread, and receives gifts of money. This is still the case in some places. By contrast, the sister-brother festival, with origins in folk culture, had names which varied with location. Some were rendered as Saluno, Silono, and Rakri. A ritual associated with Saluno included the sisters placing shoots of barley behind the ears of their brothers.

Of special significance to married women, Raksha Bandhan is rooted in the practice of territorial or village exogamy. The bride marries out of her natal village or town, and her parents by custom do not visit her in her married home. In rural north India, where village exogamy is strongly prevalent, large numbers of married Hindu women travel back to their parents' homes every year for the ceremony. Their brothers, who typically live with their parents or nearby, sometimes travel to their sisters' married home to escort them back. Many younger married women arrive a few weeks earlier at their natal homes and stay until the ceremony. The brothers serve as lifelong intermediaries between their sisters' married and parental homes, as well as potential stewards of their security.

What do you think? 
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Wednesday, August 3, 2022

Blog Housekeeping

A kind soul who has been friendly to this blog for a long time reminded me of some dead links and alerted me to others I hadn't noticed. Thank you so much for that! 

I appreciate help from you, dear readers.

This blog is a labor of love, in multiple ways. I do this out of love. I do not accept any money for this blog, not even through advertising. This is not how I earn income. This is how I help. This is how I contribute and give back. People need to speak up for equality, and I am someone who will.

I have no paid staff. I have limited time. So, it helps me when you point things out to me. Please forgive me for dead links. This blog has been around for over twelve years and having some links die is unavoidable. I'll try to fix important links when I can.

Someone else told me he was having trouble posting a comment. Since I didn't change anything, that might be a (hopefully temporary) problem with Blogger. You are also free to send me comments through contacting me and you can tell me to post them on the blog or not to post them. Something I recommend if you've written a comment here is to copy your comment before attempted to post it, so that if something goes wrong, you can paste the comment when you try again, or you can send it to me.

Always feel free to reach out to me, dear readers. And always feel free to re-establish contact if it has been a while. There aren't a lot of active "Consanguinamory Consultants," and there are so many of you, people who read our posts for any number of reasons, so it is usually going to be up to you to keep in touch.

You are welcome here and welcome to contact me regardless of your gender, sexual orientation, relationships, kinks, etc.
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Monday, August 1, 2022

Missed Opportunities

Do you have stories to share about missed opportunities?

Sometimes, flirtation and other hints or what we call “testing the waters” are missed or misinterpreted. This is also, even especially, true when it comes to close relatives or family members, or others that might be considered “taboo” or “off limits,” such as:
  • a sibling’s, parent’s, or son/daughter’s friend or lover (current or former)
  • a current or past lover’s sibling, parent, son/daughter, or friend
  • a friend’s sibling, parent, or son/daughter
And those situations could have been potentially cheating, or done with the agreement of all, or even an attempt for a threesome or moresome.

This applies whether you raised or were raised with or by your genetic relative or not; adoptive or step relatives also count.

1) Do you suspect or know you missed one or more opportunities with a relative or other “taboo” potential partner? (Hindsight can often reveal these, if not noticed or understood at the time.)

2) Did you miss an opportunity to make a move or a pass because you hesitated or didn’t work up the nerve?

3) Did you flirt, hint, or make a move but the other person didn’t catch on, or thought you were only joking, or rebuffed it?

Whether anything like the above delayed the connection and it eventually happened or denied it and it never happened, it counts for my query.

Comment below or contact me privately. I can be reached at fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com. I’m very responsive so if you don’t hear back from me after a day or so, check your spam or junk folder. I never share what someone tells me privately without their permission.
 
Maybe one of these things is going on right now or happened recently. If you need help with that, we can talk about that. 

Of course, if you eventually did get together I’ve long been encouraging
 people with experience to contact me. Now is as good of a time as any. But this post was mostly so I could read more about missed opportunities.

Need some examples?

Here are a few, but anything that might fit the above criteria is welcome.

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