Tuesday, January 17, 2012

People Are Not Property

If you are interested in polyamory, there's a worthwhile blog called "The Atheist, Polyamorous, Skeptic" where shaunphilly writes very well. One recent entry begins this way...

I have had a number of conversations about relationships, sexuality, and exclusivity over the years. I’ve heard many proposed reasons why polyamory cannot work for people in general or for specific individuals. But what are most interesting are the objections which are intended as critiques of polyamory, but if analyzed they turn out to be apologies for remaining jealous or possessive.

As Shaun points out...

That is, there is a difference between saying that you are happy in your exclusive relationship and saying that you could not be polyamorous because you are jealous or possessive.

Further, many arguments against polyamory could be viewed as arguments against relationships in general.

Good points. I don't agree with all of Shaun's points in this entry, but these are definitely ones with which I do agree.

Your lovers and romantic partners are not your property. You are not sharing what is yours in being polyamorous, you are just recognizing the reality that they will love other people and are grown up enough to not demand that they ignore this fact.

Some people do promise, and expect in return, exclusive access to a lover's body and sexual affection. But this isn't a necessity for everyone.
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