Tuesday, January 17, 2012

The Best Way to Respond to Bigots

…is to make them defend their bigotry, not try to convince them they’re right about everyone else except you or your friends. Show solidarity!

All too typical are essays like this bus-sighting one from Leonard Pitts Jr., noting the boos Rick Santorum received recently when he refused to support the same-sex freedom to marry. Pitts invokes Discredited Argument #3.

Namely, that there is not and never has been a large culture of people who felt biologically driven toward polygamous behavior, much less who seek social sanction for it.

Rights aren’t reserved for the majority. Rights are not determined by how many people are being denied. That an adult should be free to marry any consenting adults applies to the polyamorous as well as the monogamous, regardless of whether the poly person is heterosexual, gay, bisexual, etc.

Far more people are nonmonogamist than are gay or lesbian. But it wouldn’t matter if there were just two gay men in the entire country. They should be free to marry. And it wouldn’t matter if there was just one polycule in the entire country. They should be free to marry, too.

Rather than throwing other adults in consensual relationships under the bus, why not respond to Santorum and other bigots with “Why not let an adult marry any consenting adults?” They won’t be able to defend their bigotry.

It’s wrong for countries that allow polygyny to ban same-gender marriage as well as other forms of polygamy, and it is wrong for countries like Canada, with same-gender monogamous marriage, to ban polygamous marriages. We have enough experience to see that some people are polygamous and unable to be happily monogamous. Some people are polyamorous as a basic part of their personality.

Equality just for some is not equality. We need full marriage equality sooner rather than later. A woman should be free to marry another woman, or two, even if one is her sister, even if one is already married. As long as they all consent, none of that hurts anyone.
— — —

No comments:

Post a Comment

To prevent spam, comments will have to be approved, so your comment may not appear for several hours. Feedback is welcome, including disagreement. I only delete/reject/mark as spam: spam, vulgar or hateful attacks, repeated spouting of bigotry from the same person that does not add to the discussion, and the like. I will not reject comments based on disagreement, but if you don't think consenting adults should be free to love each other, then I do not consent to have you repeatedly spout hate on my blog without adding anything to the discourse.

If you want to write to me privately, then either contact me on Facebook, email me at fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com, or tell me in your comment that you do NOT want it published. Otherwise, anything you write here is fair game to be used in a subsequent entry. If you want to be anonymous, that is fine.

IT IS OK TO TALK ABOUT SEX IN YOUR COMMENTS, BUT PLEASE CHOOSE YOUR WORDS CAREFULLY AS I WANT THIS BLOG TO BE AS "SAFE FOR WORK" AS POSSIBLE. If your comment includes graphic descriptions of activity involving minors, it's not going to get published.