Translate

Thursday, February 28, 2019

Consanguinamorous Youth

This blog is about equal rights for consenting adults.

But what about minors? It is dangerous to ignore that many minors experiment, explore, and get affectionate with each other. I'm talking about age peers. If an older person is coercing you, or messing with you while you (try to) sleep, that's NOT what this is about. Don't let anyone abuse you!

Much of this entry on how consanguinamorous people can protect themselves is relevant, as can this entry on living together.

This essay is a result of someone anonymous contacting this blog's sister Tumblr to describe a situation he had experienced in his life and to ask if there are any resources to help people who are currently in the position he'd been in so many years ago.

A subsequent message was from a teacher who had to report minors who've revealed their experiences with consanguineous sex, due to mandatory reporting laws that apply to people in certain jobs.

What do you do if you're in a consanguineous relationship or you think you have a consanguinamorous orientation, but you're under the age of consent or not a legal adult?

Please note: Most of this entry is going to be strictly about how things are and practical situations, not about the morality of any given situation or actions. While we welcome all adults and anyone struggling due to prejudice against their gender identity, sexual orientation, or relationships, this entry is NOT endorsing or advocating underage sex or anything else illegal.

— — —

Tuesday, February 26, 2019

Myth: If Only They'd Known Ahead of Time, GSA Wouldn't Have Happened

Reality: There have been people who knew of their genetic relation and also knew about reunion Genetic Sexual Attraction, who were averse to the idea of sexual interaction between close genetic relatives, who have, nonetheless, experienced GSA.

The only way to be sure to avoid GSA is to either:

1) Never introduce/reunite genetic relatives raised apart, which is impossible given that they’ve been known to end up together without even intending to.

OR

2) Make sure they’re a regular part of each other’s life while growing up.

#2 May not be desirable for any number of reasons, but even close relatives who were raised together might end up having sexual interaction. For example, back in the 1970s studies revealed that about ten percent of people in their early twenties would admit to already having had (consensual, to be redundant) sexual contact with a sibling. This doesn’t even include contact with other close relatives. The percentage is probably higher today. While this usually doesn’t fall under what we define as GSA, it is still what people are worried about: close relatives enjoying each other sexually. So, avoiding the kind of distance that fosters GSA is still not an assurance that there will not be an attraction and/or some sexual interaction between close genetic relatives.

See Myth: GSA Feelings Will Go Away

See Myth: People Only Experience GSA Because They’d Heard About It or Knew of Their Relation
— — —

Monday, February 25, 2019

Coming Out Consanguinamorous


Introduction

"Coming out" means declaring or no longer hiding that you're consanguinamorous in orientation or in a consanguinamorous relationship. Whether, when, to whom, and how to come out is something that can weigh on the mind of a consanguinamorous person.

Getting to decide whether, when, to whom, and how to come out is a privilege that is sometimes denied people who are outed against their will or by accident. Consanguinamorous people should seriously consider how to protect themselves.


Please note this entry is about coming out in general, such as to family, friends, etc., not about coming out to a romantic/sexual/spousal partner. That has many different considerations and warrants its own entry.

Stay in the Closet If/Until...

— — —

Sunday, February 24, 2019

Making a Mark

People in consanguinamorous relationships are everywhere, though consanguinamorists tend to be closeted. Fortunately, some are willing to be interviewed for this blog. As a result, Full Marriage Equality has featured scores of exclusive interviews with lovers are denied the freedom to be open about their love and are, by law, denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law.

The man interviewed below should be free to legally marry his lover, yet they can't, and they could be imprisoned and have their lives ruined if they were outed to the wrong people. They are consenting adults who aren't hurting anyone; why should they be denied their rights? In much of the world, including all but a a few US states, they could be criminally prosecuted for their love

Read the interview below and see for yourself what this man has to say. You may think his relationship is interesting, or it might make you uncomfortable, or you might find it ideal, even highly erotic and romantic, but whatever your reaction, should these lovers be denied equal access to marriage or any other rights simply because they love each other this way?


WARNINGS: Mildly explicit sexuality.



*****



FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Describe yourself.

Mark: I’m a thirty-something white male. I live on the outskirts of a big city in Switzerland. I have no kids or siblings. I think I'm middle class; I can afford to treat myself, and mom, to some niceties of life, but don't own a yacht or a Ferrari. I'm an avid cyclist, downhill skier and love photography. I'm a member of a handball team and earn my living as an engineer.  I like to think that I'm liked and respected by my peers.  Although I do enjoy good company, I'm not a party animal. 

— — —

Saturday, February 23, 2019

PSA: Polyandry is a Form of Polygamy

Far too many people refer to polyandry as the "opposite" of polygamy. Or people will say "Polygamy and polyandry..."

Polygamy is marriage or marriages between three or more people, regardless of gender.

Polyandry is marriage to multiple men.

Polygyny is marriage to multiple women.


So...


Polyandry is a form of polygamy.

Polygyny is a form of polygamy.

Polygamy has many forms. It can be three people, regardless of gender, married to each other. It can be four people, regardless of gender, married to each other. It can be one person, regardless of gender, with concurrent marriages to two, three, four, or more people, regardless of genders.

If everyone involved is a consenting adult, then polygamy in any form can be considered a form of polyamory, which itself is a form of ethical nonmonogamy.

This link and this link might help explain.
— — —

Friday, February 22, 2019

Myth: GSA Feelings Will Go Away

Reality: They might. That also means they might not.

Some people experiencing Genetic Sexual Attraction report that their feelings have lasted years while they avoided any sexual contact. Others report their feelings changing after sharing a sexual relationship. Still others report the feelings endure with intensity in an ongoing consanguinamorous relationship. There are other possibilities as well.

It is common for feelings to evolve in any relationship. Polyamorists often talk about New Relationship Energy and Old Relationship Energy. Most people know that relationships can often start with infatuation that may not last, and may or may not be replaced with other feelings.

It appears to be very rare for GSA to evaporate away by simply ignoring it. Family and friends who tell someone experiencing GSA to just forget about it or ignore it may mean well, but they're not aware of just how overwhelming it can be. Even people who recognize the person to which they’re attracted is bad news, even abusive, may still feel drawn intensely to them. This is yet another reason why GSA needs to be decriminalized, brought out of the shadows, and dealt with seriously and respectfully.


See Myth: Sex Will Always Ruin These Relationships

See Myth: If Only They'd Known Ahead of Time, GSA Wouldn't Have Happened
— — —

Wednesday, February 20, 2019

Laws Vary Regarding Relationships Between Consenting Adults

We've heard so many different misunderstandings about laws as they apply to relationships and sex between consenting adults. Here in the US, it is especially understandable because laws vary from state to state. There are, of course, fifty states, but there are also other jurisdictions such as the District of Columbia, territories, such as Puerto Rico and the U.S. Virgin Islands, and there are also federal laws, military codes, and laws that apply to "Indian reservations" (small areas where indigenous peoples have some level of self-determination).

If you are concerned about the laws where you are or where you're considering moving, it would be a good idea to see if the laws of that location are searchable online and to consult an attorney who specializes in family or criminal law for that jurisdiction. An experienced lawyer can tell you about how often a law is enforced even if it is still in effect, and might be able to point out ways someone could make it less likely they'd ever be prosecuted.

Some states have laws still on the books that have been ruled unconstitutional by the Supreme Court. The only reason to still have those laws is a deranged hope that the Court decision will eventually be reversed.

Unmarried sex or cohabitation, interracial relationships, same-sex relationships, certain sex positions, even using contraception or sex toys have all been illegal in some places in the US. It might seem shocking, but it is true.

As the show "Sister Wives" detailed, Utah has been the last state to enforce a law against polyfidelity, or at least saying more than one person is your spouse. We're not even talking about insurance coverage or anything like that. Simply saying that you have more than one spouse is illegal. It's outrageous, but true.

When it comes to consanguinamory, confusion ranges from "I thought it was illegal everywhere for cousins to have sex" to "There are no laws against consenting adults having sex, no matter how closely related." Both statements are false.

The fact is, first cousins are incarcerated for having sex in a handful of US states. But about half of US states will allow first cousins to legally marry (and the list of states isn't what stereotypes would have you believe), although some of them have some restrictions. That leaves many states where where they can have sex, live together, raise children together, but can't legally marry. Outrageous, but true.

As far as relatives closer than that, in general, 47 states have laws against relatives closer than first cousins having sex. Ohio allows siblings to be together. Rhode Island and New Jersey have no laws against adults being together, no matter how closely related. Some other states apparently haven't criminalized sex between adults and their uncles or aunts (outside of old, overturned laws that criminalized unmarried sex, given that these people weren't allowed to marry.)

None of the states will knowingly allow relatives closer than first cousins to legally marry, with certain exceptions in certain states for uncles and nieces, for example, mostly a nod to traditions from foreign cultures. Traditions are not respected, however, when it comes to having more than one legal spouse.

Note that these criminalization laws and laws denying marriage rights tend to apply to genetic ("blood") relatives even if they were legally adopted to different families and never met until well into adulthood.

Some states may have relied on criminalization of homosexuality (which was overturned) and thus might not have anti-incest laws that technically criminalize same-sex consanguinmory. Laws can get very specific, outlawing certain sex acts but not others between certain people. Yes, as silly as it sounds, some specific sex acts that don't harm anyone have been illegal in some places.

The patchwork of unjust laws needs to be changed. There shouldn't be anywhere in the US (or any other country for that matter) where consenting adults are denied their basic rights to have a mutual relationship that includes whatever form of sex they want to have, living together, and, if they want, marriage, or any other union or partnership offered under law. Nobody should fall in love and then worry that if they move for a job they won't be able to marry in their new state or might even be criminals.

There's no good reason to deny these rights. In the US, it should be obvious that legal precedents have determined that such discrimination is unjust and unconstitutional. But people are understandably confused as many unjust laws are still enforced.
— — —

Monday, February 18, 2019

Myth: Sex Will Always Ruin GSA Relationships Because a Person Needs a Nonsexual Relationship With Their Genetic Relative

Reality: Sometimes including sex in the relationship is the best option for the relationship.

By definition, people experiencing reunion Genetic Sexual Attraction didn’t have ongoing familial relationships with the person(s) to whom they are attracted. They may want to develop one, and they may already be happy with their existing familial relationships.

Many people report that consaguinamory made them much closer, even if they have ceased that part of their relationship.

As far as someone needing a nonsexual relationship with a relative… in many situations involving GSA, the person does have a nonsexual relationship with some genetic relatives. On the other hand, there are people who never have any relationship whatsoever with their close genetic relatives who do quite well in life.

What people need in their lives is not to be subjected to abusive relationships, regardless of whether there is a close genetic relation. What people need is not to be criminalized or bullied or discriminated against for whatever consensual relationship they have.

See Myth: There is Only One Good Outcome to GSA

See Myth: GSA Feelings Will Go Away
— — —

Sunday, February 17, 2019

Presidents Day

It's one of our extended holiday weekends here in the US, meaning Monday is a national holiday, this time for Presidents Day (which replaced Washington's Birthday and Lincoln's Birthday).

All the modern Presidents have been men married to a woman while campaigning and in office. There was at least one President in our history who wasn't married. Reagan had been divorced and remarried. Trump, as most people know, has been divorced twice and is into his third marriage.

We came very close to having our first female President. Of course, she was and is married to a man (one of our former Presidents!)

When will we have a woman as President? When will he have an out LGBTQ President? There are least a couple of women serving in high office right now who could eventually break both barriers at the same time.

We have had plenty of nonmonogamous Presidents. When will we have one who is openly, ethically nonmonogamous?

Hopefully, more and more future voters will understand that people can be great leaders and be gay, or lesbian, or pansexual, and/or genderqueer, and/or polyamorous.

With consanguinamory still being criminalized in most states, having openly an openly consanguinamorous President seems much further off. Never say never, though.

— — —

Friday, February 15, 2019

Ten Myths About Sibling Consanguinamory

I’ve noticed some common myths expressed about sibling consanguinamory. In this instance, by consanguinamory, I mean everything from curious exploration and experimenting to erotic romance, including masturbating in front of each other, erotic kissing, sexual touching or rubbing, oral sex, intercourse, etc.

This entry is NOT addressing molestation, assault, or abuse.

I’m referring to adult siblings, or minor siblings who are close in age, engaging in mutual affection or experimentation, without coercion, force, or intimidation. It may be two siblings alone, it may be three or more siblings, or it may be two or more siblings involved together with one or more people outside of the immediate family.

These myths need to be addressed, because they perpetuate inequality, discrimination, hardship, confusion, stigmas, ignorance, and fear.

Myth #1 “It doesn’t happen” or “It happens very rarely” or “I don’t know anyone who has done this.” Just because one person hasn’t been involved or doesn’t remember being involved with sibling doesn’t mean it isn’t happening with others. It is, and it always has. Ongoing sexual relationships between siblings are common enough that everyone knows someone who is, or has been in, such a relationship, and far more siblings than that have had an encounter or experimented, explored, or played doctor. Reality: We all know people who've been involved, whether we know it or not.
— — —

Thursday, February 14, 2019

Myth: There is Only One Good Outcome to GSA

Reality: What is a good or the best outcome to a situation involving Genetic Sexual Attraction depends on the circumstances and the people involved.

Situations involving Genetic Sexual Attraction are varied. There have been people who’ve fallen in love, married, and had children before they’ve discovered their close genetic relation. There are situations where one person is experiencing GSA but nobody else is. There are situations in which one person involved is an abusive person. Sometimes people experiencing GSA had been happily committed to someone else in a closed relationship. Sometimes GSA involves people who are in dead marriages to others, raising children. Sometimes there is an adult in their thirties or forties and a teenager who is too young to legally consent and not independent.

Some people want to apply their religious rules or their personal prejudice against consanguinamory to say that that sexual affection is never good in a GSA situation.

This blog fully supports the rights of consenting adults to share in sexual affection, but we recognize that not every specific relationship is a healthy one.

For some, spending a lot of time together in-person is helpful. For others, keeping interaction limited is better.

For some, building a life going forward that involves socializing in the genetic roles (parent-adult child, siblings, etc.) works best. For others, it might be more of a friendship. For still others, it might be as lovers.

For a small number of people, the best outcome is keeping a distance or cutting off contact entirely.

For some people, it is best that their relationship not involve sex. For others, a relationship that includes sex for a limited amount of time is best. For still others, relationship that includes sex in perpetuity, such as a spousal relationship, is the best outcome. People should be able to seek the best outcome without the undue influence of bigotry.

There is no single, one-size-fits-all way to deal with GSA. In some relationships, getting sexual is the best the course of action. In others, it wouldn’t be a positive thing. This is one reason why it is critical that people experiencing GSA be allowed to get the assistance they need without criminalization or other forms of discrimination.

See Myth: GSA Causes Birth Defects or the Children Will Be Deformed

See Myth: Sex Will Always Ruin These Relationships Because a Person Needs a Nonsexual Relationship With Their Genetic Relative




— — —

Wednesday, February 13, 2019

Is Polyamory Just Another Word For Swinging or an Open Relationship?

NO.

These three terms are not synonymous.

All three ARE forms of ethical nonmonogamy or consensual nonmonogamy.


Swinging can involve unattached individuals, but usually involves established couples (or even triads, quads, etc.) in group encounters with others, in which the focus is on casual sex. Sure, the people involved can be friends, even close and longtime friends, they might even love each other, but what's going on is that people get together at sex parties.

Open relationships, including open marriages, are relationships in which there is an existing, established bond, but those in the relationship have agreed that they are open to new partners, whether they are short term or long term partners.

There is also swapping, in which people in a relationship trade partners with people in another relationship, mostly for sex. This is usually done with just two or three couples, as opposed to at a party.

Polyamory means having a romantic, dating, courting, nesting, or spousal relationship with more than one person, with the agreement of all. It takes on many, many forms. It could be a triad who live as spouses to each other. It could involve a married couple who also have girlfriends/boyfriends they see individually or together. It could be four people who are dating each other on an ongoing basis. There are countless forms of polyamory. Some people are polyamorous as an orientation.

Some polyamorous relationships are open. Some are closed. Some polyamorous people engage in swapping and/or swinging, some don't.

Many people who are in open relationships or who swing or swap don't consider themselves polyamorous, especially if they're only looking for casual sex when they get with people outside of their relationships.

There are people in open relationships who are not swingers and do not engage in swapping. There are people who will do swapping but don't consider themselves swingers. There are swingers who do not identify their relationship as open, especially if the only time and place they will get sexual with others is at a swingers club/party.

So, the terms mean different things. And there are other forms of ethical nonmonogamy.


"Yeah, but aren't these all just different words for cheating?"

NO!

Cheating is breaking the rules.

Ethical or consensual nonmonogamy means that the people involved have agreements ("rules") that allow for what they are doing.

To be sure, there are people who are involved in these forms of ethical/consensual nonmonogamy who are sometimes involved in cheating, but that is because they broke the rules.

It is up to the people involved in a relationship what the terms of their relationship will be, and if and when those terms will change. As people go through life, their desires and needs can change and they might revisit the terms to modify them.

We need to ensure that adults, regardless of gender, can share love, sex, residence, and marriage (and any of those things without the others) with any and all consenting adults, without fear of prosecution, bullying, or discrimination. There is no good reason our laws shouldn't protect these rights, and institutions and service providers need to except and account for the fact that some people are nonmonogamous, and not assume everyone is monogamous or wants monogamy, and certainly not try to force people to be monogamous.
— — —

Tuesday, February 12, 2019

Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day is here again. Many people will be getting married. Married people will be celebrating their anniversaries, or simply having a night out, as will other people hoping to get married someday, or maybe just enjoying being together in public.

If you are in such a situation, good for you and enjoy it.

Whether you are or not, take a moment to think about all of the people who can’t marry the person or person(s) they love, or can’t so much as hold hands in public without being accosted. Think about the people, consenting adults, who have to completely hide their relationships because they could be sent to prison for simply having sex in private. Think about the people who have to hide who they are because, where they live, they could be killed for being who they are. Think about the people who can’t accept gifts from their their lover(s) at work, or even a loving comment in social media, because it would out them and get them fired.

This is what goes on because some people are being denied their rights to share sex, love, residence, and marriage. The US has had the limited monogamous same-gender freedom to marry nationwide, which was a great step forward, for years now, and it hasn't hurt anything. Other victories for that freedom to marry since February 14, 2018 have included...

Alderney ...June 14, 2018
Jersey ...July 1
(A referendum to constitutionally ban same-sex marriage in Romania failed ...October 7)
Bermuda (again!) ...November 23
(Same-sex civil unions become legal in San Marino ...December 5)
Austria ...January 1, 2019

In most of the world, a man can’t marry both of the women he loves, despite both women being in favor of such a marriage.

The people in most of these interviews can't have legally recognized marriages anywhere in the world, with perhaps one or two exceptions, and we need full marriage equality before people like Linda, Melissa, and Matthew can tie the knot.

So enjoy Valentine's Day if you are able, but think for a moment about the people who will only be able to fully enjoy theirs when we have full marriage equality so that an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race, or religion, is free to share love, sex, residence, and marriage with any and all consenting adults without prosecution, persecution, or discrimination. Help make it happen sooner rather than later.

Do you have special plans? Or, if you're reading this after Valentine's Day, do you have anything special to report? If so, comment below. Remember, you can comment anonymously. Or, if you prefer, send Keith an email at fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com
— — —

Sunday, February 10, 2019

Not Too Close For Comfort

A comment came in on our popular entry "Aunts and Nephews"...
I'm currently in an active sexual relationship with my nephew. We aren't blood or marriage related. His mom and I are best friends and I helped raise him. The last time I saw him he was 11, we reunited now that he's 18 approaching 19. I'm 34. The attraction was instant and mutual. I feel like I am betraying my friend however, the amount of enjoyment and satisfaction I get from this guy is worth the risk. I think she suspects we're intimate but there's no proof. Her boyfriend is quite jealous that I don't look in his direction and tried to out nephew and I... Good luck, we both deny until we die! I don't want to stop, and neither does he. Any thoughts?
It's time to write a long-overdue essay on "fauxcest" or "nearcest" of whatever else this can be called. So that's below. But first, let's answer the questions raised Anonymous.

1) You two are consenting adults. You should be free to have this relationship. There's nothing wrong with having this relationship.

2) "I feel like I am betraying my friend..." This is not a rational reaction. It is a feeling that is based in prejudices and faulty reasoning. Your "nephew" would certainly be sexually active with someone, whether his mother is comfortable with that thought or not. Why is it is a bad thing that is with someone who already knows and cares about him? Sex isn't a bad thing, unless you are doing it wrong.

Someone might say to you "He's young enough to be your son" or to him "She's old enough to be your mother." But so what? Someone might go a step further and say he must be harboring a secret desire for his mother and you for your son (if you have one). That may or may not be true, but even if true, neither of you would find any scolding from us. It is very common for people to find someone who is like one of their parents or siblings, for example.

There's a chance your relationship will be outed (some of this advice might be helpful). And, it is likely that if that happens, your friend will be very upset with you. She might try to attribute her anger to the secrecy, but that would most likely just be an excuse. Neither of you is under any obligation to tell her the details of your sex life. If she finds out and is angry, give her time to cool off. You can tell her you understand her feelings without denying your entitlement to your love life. Many parents get upset at the thought of their child (even though their child is an adult) having sex. Some people get upset that someone they know is having sex  with someone to whom they're related. Neither reaction is based on logic, but rather things like aversion to change, feeling old, and even envy.

After she cools  off, she might realize that it can be a better thing that her son is with someone who has already known and cared for him. Some of this applies.


Enjoy what you have. There's no reason you shouldn't. Goodness knows there are many people out there who are miserable in a relationship or lonely. Why deprive anyone, especially yourself, of happiness?
— — —

Saturday, February 9, 2019

Myth: GSA Causes Birth Defects or the Children Will Be Deformed


Reality: If sex between people brought together through Genetic Sexual Attraction results in a birth, GSA does not cause birth defects in and of itself.

Most children born to close relatives are healthy. You know some, whether you know it or not and whether they know their own true parentage or not.

Birth defects can be the result of injury during pregnancy, substances ingested during pregnancy, environmental factors, or genetic problems. It is the last one that people tend to be thinking of, usually, when they repeat this myth. That’s because when both genetic parents carry the same genetic problem, it may be demonstrated in the children. However, this can happen with parents who aren’t closely related, too. A genetic problem may also result in a child if only one parent carries the genetic problem.

Many people who are brought together through GSA don't have children together, due to personal choices, or age, or surgery, or their genders, or some other condition, or even fear of the children being used as evidence in prosecution. See here for more extensive information about this topic.

See Myth: People Who Act on GSA Won’t Be Able to Have Normal Lives

See Myth: There is Only One Good Outcome to GSA
— — —

Friday, February 8, 2019

Another Couple Denied Their Right to Marry

As a result of people in consanguinamorous relationships being brave enough to reach out, Full Marriage Equality has featured scores of exclusive interviews with lovers are denied the freedom to be open about their love and are, by law, denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law.

The man interviewed below should be free to legallmarry his lover, yet they can't, and they could have their lives ruined if they were outed to the wrong people. They are consenting adults who aren't hurting anyone; why should they be denied their rights? In much of the world, including all but a a few US states, they could be criminally prosecuted for their love

Read the interview below and see for yourself what this man has to say about his love with his mother. You may think this relationship is interesting, or it might make you uncomfortable, or you might find it ideal, even highly erotic and romantic, but whatever your reaction, should these lovers be denied equal access to marriage or any other rights simply because they enjoy what we call double love?


*****




FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Describe yourself.

Anonymous Son: I live in India and from an upper middle class family. I currently work for a consulting firm.


FME: You currently live with... (siblings, parents, children, roommates)?

I currently live with my mother.

— — —

Thursday, February 7, 2019

A Daughter Supports Her Parents

People in consanguinamorous relationships are everywhere, though consanguinamorists tend to be closeted. Even where their love is not criminalized, they can still face harassment, discrimination, and other forms or persecution. Fortunately, some consanguinamorists and some family members are willing to be interviewed for this blog. As a result, Full Marriage Equality has featured scores of exclusive interviews with lovers are denied the freedom to be open about their love and are, by law, denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law. This blog has also had a few interviews with family members of consanguinamorists, such as the one below. 

The woman interviewed below shouldn't have hide the truth about her family.Her parents are consenting adults who aren't hurting anyone; why should they be denied their rights? 

Read the interview below and see for yourself what she has to say when she can speak freely in safety. The interview has been edited for clarity, as English is not her first language.

*****

FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Describe yourself.

Anonymous Daughter: I'm 19, living in a city in Russia, with my parents at the moment. I just finished my studies and I'm not working now. 

— — —

Wednesday, February 6, 2019

Frequently Asked Question: Can Siblings Marry?


The following is based on my understanding. I’m not at attorney and this should not be considered legal advice.

Can siblings marry?

I’m not aware of any government that will currently marry full-blood siblings or recognize a marriage of full-blood siblings; rather, if it was discovered by the authorities after an official marriage was formed that the spouses were, in fact, siblings, the marriage would be dissolved and considered invalid. If the spouses knew they were siblings when they married, they would be subject to prosecution. If they discovered the genetic relationship after getting married, they would have to file for an annulment or dissolution or risk prosecution.

Where sibling consanguinamory isn’t still banned by law, siblings can have a wedding ceremony and live the married life, although under discrimination, as their government will not recognize their marriage and they will not get treated equally.

— — —

Tuesday, February 5, 2019

Dr. Elisabeth Sheff of Fidelity in Polyamorous Relationships

Sheff continues to write on polyamory, and anyone who wants to know more about polyamory (or ethical nonmonogamy or consensually nonmonogamous relationships in general) should check out what she's written. It is to the credit of psychologytoday.com that they carry these writings. This latest article is on various kinds of fidelity.
Polyfidelity is a form of polyamory in which a group of people agree to be sexually exclusive with each other and not have lovers outside of the group. Usually these groups are quite small—triads with three people or quads with four are most common—though they can be as large as 20-plus people who form an exclusive intimate network. Twin reasons usually motivate people to consider polyfidelity: sexual exclusivity among a smaller group makes fluid bonding much easier, and a desire for emotional exclusivity.  Some groups choose to be polyfidelitous for a while and then later open their sexual choices to include others beyond the group and become polyamorous. For others, especially those who accidentally fell in love with each other and were not necessarily seeking a poly relationship per se but one happened to them anyway, the relationship expanded beyond two is quite enough and the idea of adding even more people to their lives is not appealing.
There's a whole world of different ways to do relationships. We're all better off when our laws and how we respect others take this into account.

— — —

Sunday, February 3, 2019

Myth: People Who Act on GSA Won’t Be Able to Have Normal Lives


Reality: The only hindrance to having a “normal life” for those who continue together in a Genetic Sexual Attraction relationship is the bigotry of others.

Some who’ve been brought together through GSA lead perfectly "normal," even unusually good lives. This is more likely to be possible with the support of friends and family and will be even more likely with decriminalization of GSA and the arrival of full marriage equality.

Until then, many people in consanguinamorous relationships are somewhat closeted. There may be people you know who seem like the cutest couple, and may be great neighbors, who are actually people who were brought together by GSA.

Please help make it possible for more people who've been brought together through GSA lead "normal" lives.

See Myth: Only Defective People Experience GSA

See Myth: GSA Causes Birth Defects or the Children Will Be Deformed
— — —

Saturday, February 2, 2019

Frequently Asked Question: How Common is Incest?

The short answer: Nobody knows for sure, but it appears to be common enough that you know someone who has been involved, whether you know it or not. If you have been, are, or want to be involved, you are not alone and it doesn’t make you bad or sick. You’re in the company of royals and peasants, urban dwellers and rural folk, the wealthy and the poor throughout history. Regardless, rights are not reserved for the majority.

This answer is addressing consensual incest, in which I include, in addition to adults, minors who four years or less apart in age when force or coercion are not used. This is what I call “consanguinamory” or consanguineous sex. This answer is not about child molestation, sexual assault, or rape.

— — —

Friday, February 1, 2019

Nebraska Denies Marriage Equality and Arrests Consenting Adults

Grand Island police in Hall County, Nebraska must be wondering why they arrested consenting adults for exercising their fundamental rights. Here's yet another example of why unjust laws need to be overturned or repealed, and removed and why we need full marriage equality.

This case has been widely reported and names and pictures of the persecuted have been splashed everywhere.

From 1011now.com...
According to the Grand Island Police Department, a father and a daughter, a 21-year-old female and a 39-year-old male, have been arrested for incest. 
On January 29, Travis E. Fieldgrove, a 39-year-old St. Paul male, and Samantha H. Kershner, a 21-year-old St. Paul female, were arrested on warrants relating to an incest case, according to authorities.
Did they abuse a third person? No!

GIPD said this case relates to the two being involved in an intimate relationship beginning in September of 2018 in Grand Island, Nebraska despite evidence that Fieldgrove is the paternal parent of Kershner.
This shouldn't be a crime! This is nobody else's business? Who is the victim??? If she's a victim, then why was she arrested?!?

Evidence leading up to the arrest suggests that Fieldgrove and Kershner were aware of the biological relationship before being intimate, and further indicates that they quickly married one another after being notified of the investigation.
It's still a crime even if they weren't aware. Because the law is ridiculous!!! They should be free to marry. Unfortunately, they aren't yet. They should have protected themselves.
Court records indicate that the two married at the Adams County courthouse in Hastings. 
Both Fieldgrove and Kershner are charged with felony incest in both Hall and Adams counties.
So two counties are wasting public resources. This needs to stop!

— — —