*****
Shiffon: For work as well as personal reasons. Someone came to know about our relationship and before that person could cause trouble, we made the move. It was already in planning but that caused me to prepone. No one knows about us here, so we are living as a couple.
FME: How did that start?
It started when he was 18 and I was 48. He'd been getting peeks at me, mostly when I was changing. I pretended not to notice. He was a very curious teenager.
Initially, I was surprised, but didn't want to embarrass him. But I was also flattered.
He became more physical in his affections. His hugs became tighter and his kisses got a bit more bold. It was a turn on. I could feel that he was aroused.
On his 18th birthday, we went out for dinner. When we came back home, things just happened naturally. He kissed me and I didn't stop him. It was very sensual.
FME: So you raised him?
I raised him. He's an only child.
FME: Was he the first younger man you'd been with?
Yes.
FME: So it was a new experience in more than one way.
It sure was, but there were no conflicts in my mind once it happened. It always felt natural.
FME: Who knows, aside from the person we mentioned earlier, and how did they find out?
A friend of mine knows. I told her. She is my best friend and I trust her completely.
FME: How did she react?
She was a little surprised, but not shocked. She told me she always knew he was curious.
FME: How long has this been going on?
Two years. He is happy and I couldn't have asked for more.
FME: Are you monogamous?
Yes, it has been monogamous, but there are no restrictions or rules.
FME: Is this a family-with-benefits situation, gilfriend/boyfriend, a marriage, or what?
It's not marriage, but it sure is a relationship. I can't define it in any parameters. I guess it is a combination of all of the above. It has been beautiful. I don't think I would legally marry again. As they say, "once bitten is twice shy," but I fully support people who want to.
FME: Does the sex feel natural, kinky, or what?
The sex is great. It's the best ever. It can feel natural and kinky. It doesn't hurt that he is a big boy in more than one way.
FME: Do you do things with him you wouldn't or hadn't done with others?
Absolutely. I've taught him a lot and learned a lot. He is more adventurous now.
FME: Are there any other benefits to having this kind of relationship?
It is unconditional and without any selfishness, and that is what makes it amazing.
FME: What about negatives? What have you had to do to protect your privacy?
We had to move to Germany, but it turned out to be a positive.
FME: What advice do you have for people with these feelings or considering making a pass at a family member, especially mother or son?
Don't do it until you are completely sure of your feelings. Also, if you are sure about what you want, do it in a very careful way.
FME: What advice do you have for family or friends who suspect someone they know is in involved?
Keep an open mind, don't judge them, and certainly don't create problems for them.
FME: Anything else you want to say to the world?
Life is too short. Don't complicate it. Just let people live their life.
*****
Clearly, these lovers are consenting adults who aren't hurting anyone and yet they have to stay closeted and can't even exercise their basic human right to marry. They are happy and in love, yet they are denied that fundamental right of freedom of association. Please note that they were not breaking in laws in New Jersey, but they still could have faced severe discrimination and harassment if they were outed there.
Why should they be denied their rights? There’s no good reason.We need to recognize that all adults should be free to be with any and all consenting adults as they mutually consent, and part of doing that is adopting relationship rights for all, including full marriage equality sooner rather than later.
People are being hurt because of a denial of their basic human rights to love each other freely.
You can read other interviews I have done here. As you'll see, there are people from all walks of life who are in consanguinamorous relationships.
If you are in a relationship like this and are looking for help or others you can talk with, read this. If you know someone who is in a relationship like this, please read this.
Thank you to Shiffon for doing this interview! We wish you well in your intergenerational consanguinamorous relationship.
What a beautiful relationship, how could anyone want to tear them apart all because they happen to be related? It's time society realized there's no reason to keep absurd and outdated laws against consensual relationships between adult relatives and that they're just as real and valid as any other relationship between consenting adults.
ReplyDeleteWhy did you move to Germany? Was it the distance or incest is accepted in Germany? Just keep it between the two of you and let's hope,the one you both escaped from does not follow you here.Best luck.
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