Living Consanguinamorously - Keeping the Closet Door Closed

Someone came to this blog by searching...

How my aunt and I can hide our incestuous relationship

The answer below will apply to consanguinamorous relationships of any composition, not just aunts and nephews or aunts and nieces.

Unfortunately, people have been compelled to stay closeted due to prejudice and bigotry, sometimes enshrined in law. Whether someone has had to hide or downplay their gender identity, their sexual orientation or their "forbidden" relationship, the oppression is harmful in many ways, but some people just can't come out of the closet, at least not at a specific time in their life. In some places, it is literally a matter of life and death. Even for places where consanguinamory isn't criminalized, many people in these relationships have good reasons to hide them from at least some of the people around them. As a result, many people don't realize they know people who are in consanguinamorous relationships.

In a perfect world, people would be able to simply love other adults without such problems, but we're not there yet. Civil rights, including things like full marriage equality, are generally advancing, at least on most of the planet, but there is still a ways to go.

Much of the answer raised by the question in the search was answered in an earlier entry about how consanguineous lovers can live together, so check that out.

There's also this entry on how consanguineous lovers can avoid trouble.

I'll try to avoid repeating too much of what is in those entries.

NOT a Good Reason to Deny (Polyamorous) Love #14

“What about insurance/employment benefits?” There are many simple ways to deal with this. It is dealt with when an employee has more kids than the next, isn't it? It is not a good reason to deny the polygamous freedom to marry or polyamorous relationship rights in general.. This is something the law and/or employers and unions can figure out.

There is no good reason to deny an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race or religion, the right to share love, sex, residence, and marriage (and any of those without the others) with any and all consenting adults without prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.

Feel free to share, copy and paste, and otherwise distribute. This has been adapted from this page at Full Marriage Equality: http://marriage-equality.blogspot.com/p/discredited-invalid-arguments.html

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny (Polyamorous) Love #13 

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny (Polyamorous) Love #15

Data From College About Siblings

On Quora, Someone named Abigail Petersen. who graduated in 2021 after studying forensic science and psychology, answered a question asking how common it is for brothers and sisters to get together. 

I will cut in to say, It’s a lot more common than people think or like to admit. The only problem is, getting people to talk about it. We really shouldn’t be surprised about it. A big brother is, quite often, the first grown penis many of us girls see in real life. Living in close proximity, accidents happen, opportunity for peeping is there, and curiosity gets the better of us. That and you have brothers who love to show off to anyone within view and will flash the weenie, or moon us. Sexual experimentation happens, whether people want to believe it or not.

True.

I wrote a paper in my “Psychology of Sex” class in college...I printed a survey and stood on campus having 300 girls fill it out. Only girls because this was my focus. I had a big box they could drop it in, and even allowed them to push their arm down inside to mix up the surveys so it would be impossible to find their survey. Once they were convinced results were 100% anonymous, I’d like to think they were truthful.

• Over 66% saw their sibling nude after puberty.
• Over 2/3’s let there sibling see them nude.
• 45% masturbated in front of their sibling.
• 39% wanted a sexual relationship with their sibling.
• 28% had sex with their sibling.

Fascinating.

It would be good to get more data on consanguinamory from various places, year after year, while addressing concerns about incrimination, loss of privacy, etc. so the responses would be honest and sincere. From flirting to romantic dating to sexting to various sex acts to lifelong partnerships, what have people done and what would they like to do if they could?

The Consanguinamorous and Allies Have a Place to Talk

If you're consanguinamorous or have ever been in a consanguinamorous relationship or have had sex with a close relative or want to, are experiencing Genetic Attraction or Genetic Sexual Attraction, you're a friend or family member of someone who is, or you're an ally in general, there is a good forum for you called Kindred Spirits. It's free, so come check it out, sign up with a username, and follow the instructions. The forum is based in France, which has no laws against consenting adults being consanguinamorous, but the forum is in English.

Kindred Spirits is a place to discuss both your struggles and the positive things about consanguinamory. There are multiple sections so, whether your having trouble or you're in bliss, you are welcome to participate. Connecting with others helps you and helps those others.

Please note:

• Kindred Spirits is for people considering consanguinamory or who have been involved in consanguinamory, or experiencing Genetic Attraction or Genetic Sexual Attraction, and allies, and supportive or curious friends and family.
• It is NOT for anyone under the age of 18.
• The forum is porn-free. There are plenty of other places to find porn with consanguinamory themes, so don't bother trying to find it at KS.
• The forum is not for incest fetishists or anyone else looking for fap material. Again, there are plenty of other places for that.
• The forum is not a place for haters to express their bigotry, prejudice, and ignorance. You're doing that in many other places.
• The forum is not for any adult who engages in, or wants to advocate, abusing minors or abusing anyone.

NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #8

“Polyamorous and consanguineous marriages are not the same thing as same-gender marriage.” So what? We’re talking about consenting adults who want to be together, and there’s no good reason to stop them. Some same-gender relationships and marriages are polygamous and/or consanguineous. A man should not only be able to marry another man, but two or more other men or his brother.

Strictly speaking, whether a marriage is same-gender or heterosexual is a different category than whether it is monogamous or polygamous; or exogamous or interracial, endogamous, or consanguineous. Some heterosexual marriages are monogamous, some are polygamous. Some same-gender marriages are monogamous, some are polygamous. Bisexuals may be in monogamous marriages or polygamous marriages. Some monogamous marriages are consanguineous, some aren’t. That monogamous/polygamous and exogamous/endogamous/consanguineous are different categories from heterosexual/same-gender is not a justification to deny the freedom to marry to consenting adults, or deny them marriage equality. Relationship rights belong to all adults.

It should be noted that when there is a polyamorous relationship, whether a "V" or a triad or more, at least two of the people involved are the same gender, even if they are no more than metamours to each other.

Something does not have to be immutable or inborn, like sexual orientation, to be legal. However, there are people (especially with Genetic Sexual Attraction) who are in consanguineous relationships who would swear to you that they couldn’t love anyone as much as they love their partner(s). They were born into their situations. There are people who are obviously unable to be monogamous, to the point of being willing to suffer loss of job, loss of reputation, loss of wealth, and figurative and literal loss of life, and they should not promise monogamy nor be pressured to pretend to be monogamous.

Some people simply are polyamorous.

That these other categories are not the same thing as same-gender marriage does not explain why there are still laws against them or a lack of relationship protections in the law.


There is no good reason to deny an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race or religion, the right to share love, sex, residence, and marriage (or any of those without the others) with any and all consenting adults without prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.

Feel free to share, copy and paste, and otherwise distribute. This has been adapted from this page at Full Marriage Equality: http://marriage-equality.blogspot.com/p/discredited-invalid-arguments.html

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #7

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #9 

Valentine’s Day is a Friday This Year

For those of you who’ve been thinking about getting something started with someone or trying to get something started with someone, this could be your chance.

This especially applies when the person you’re trying to get with is someone already a regular part of your personal life, as is the case with close relatives or family members.

Does that person or those people already have plans for Friday, February 14? If not, maybe you should set something up for them?

Set a date. Dates can be at home. The restaurants and other venues will be busy; setting up a nice evening in can be just what is needed.

Much of what is here on this page applies. Ideally, you’d already be to point number 4. Start now if you haven’t started yet.

If they don’t have a date, tell them you’ll treat them to a nice evening. If you don’t know whether or not they have a date, ask them if they have plans.

This doesn’t need to be a big production. Set the scene; you want to be alone with them unless anyone else present will help make things happen. Make or buy their favorite foods and drinks. Get them a nice gift that more on the romantic or erotic side, depending. We want them to feel appreciated and desired.

Special occasions can be the best time to get something started or add a new bond. Sitting around fantasizing about it for the rest of your life, never taking action even though you’ve had opportunities or could have created opportunities, is not the way to go through life. It’s up to you.

Good luck!