A guardian.co.uk, Arianne Cohen had a pleasantly lengthy article with the title, "Open Relationships: The People Making It Work." Cohen has been in an open relationship for three years herself. She profiles many poly people in various forms of relationships. Once again, I want to note that not all polyamorous relationships are open relationships. Some are. In some others, all people in the polycule only date or have sex with the other people in the polycule. In still others, one or more of the individuals may be searching for people outside of the polycule for dating, casual sex, or something with more consistency.
Non-monogamous relationships are surprisingly common and the numbers are increasing, according to Darren Langdridge, a clinical therapist, professor at the Open University and co-author with Meg Barker of Understanding Non-Monogamies.Polyamorous people are everywhere; many are closeted.
"What I see in the [UK] movement is it's the radical fringe – people with pink hair and tattoos," says Deborah Taj Anapol, a clinical psychologist and author of Polyamory In The 21st Century. "These are people who don't mind being judged or excluded from mainstream society – in fact, that's their intent. That's all fine, but I'd like to see a quicker normalisation." Which is why many non-monogamous Britons won't use the word. "It seems to be a loaded term," Lori says. "For a while we said non-monogamous, but now we just say 'poly'."
The paper printed some letters in response...
I grew up in a Roman Catholic family. Nobody got divorced, so I had to put up with the fallout from my mother's affairs and my father's distress with them. Then you had my grandparents who had not shared a bedroom since my uncle was born and still loved each other dearly. Both of them had other partners. I met two of my grandad's girlfriends, and one of my nana's partners lived with them for many years. When my nana was dying, my grandad tended her every need, held her hand and wept with her as they told each other how they still and would always love each other, and was at her bedside until the end.
Trish Obermayer of Brighton...
Polyamorous relationships suggested by the male partner. Funny that.
Actually, in mixed gender relationships, it is often the woman who suggests or introduces the male to polyamory, and many of those relationships end up being polyandrous. But if Trish thinks it is OK to neglect the needs of males because a male expressed the need, then I feel sorry for any male who tries to have a relationship with her.
If all the parties are comfortable with it and it makes them happy, what's the problem? If they're not, just like if they're not in a monogamous relationship, it's bad. It's not rocket science.Jay90 got in a good line...
Wish I could just get one girlfriend…
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Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Positive Article on Polyamory in The Gaurdian
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