Thursday, April 26, 2012

Polyandrous Polyamory

Martin wrote at about bisexuality and polyamory.

The focus here is to explore the possibility of a couple in a traditional relationship or marriage to bring another male into the relationship to address the man’s bisexuality. Many would say this is tantamount to having one’s cake and eating it too, but can it be a cake his wife can share?

In today’s world there are countless husbands satisfying their biological urges by secretly hooking-up with other like-minded men, or by developing special friendships. In other words he’s leading a double life that his wife usually doesn’t know about. Often she finds out and is devastated. He may have wanted to talk to her earlier, but he fears her reaction. If he’s found out, has actually acted on his urges, the resulting circumstances are much more difficult for both the wife and the husband.

But what if things were different? What if, early on during the dating process, the man had brought up the fact he is bisexual, that he would like to have a male friend when he gets married? Or perhaps he would like to keep the special friend he already has. What if his fiance finds she’s intrigued, even visualizes certain possibilities? A polyamorous relationship might be incubating.

He goes on to write about the necessary conditions for the development of such a relationship, then talks about some the practical advantages.

Just for the record, not all polyamorous people are bisexual (some poly people are strictly gay, others strictly hetero, others barely homoflexible or heteroflexible,) nor are all bisexuals polyamorous. That being said, many bisexual do find fulfillment in polymory, and many poly people who thought they were strictly heterosexual have discovered otherwise because of polyamory.
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