For Journalists

Requests For Interviews: PLEASE SCROLL DOWN TO ITEM #4.

You can find basic responses to typical anti-equality arguments on this page.

Accuracy in Phrasing

1. INCEST - Sex between close relatives is still illegal in many jurisdictions, and as such, law enforcement or courts may not make a distinction in their press releases between...

child rape by a relative
child molestation by a relative
statutory rape by a relative
rape/sexual assault of an adult by a relative


sex between relatives who are minors but close in age
sex between adults who are relatives.

The term “incest” may be used to describe all of those, but there is an obvious difference between the first set of crimes and the last two situations. There’s a clear difference between, say, a father molesting his 10-year-old daughter and a couple of 30-something siblings who are living as husband and wife or were caught by someone else having recreational sex.

Please provide enough details in your reports to make a distinction. Do not settle for terse statements from courts or law enforcement that do not provide a distinction. Although all incestuous activity may be illegal depending on the jurisdiction, consensual sex between adults should not be a crime and should not be lumped together with child abuse or rape.

I prefer using the phrase “consanguineous sex” to make the distinction, but perhaps journalists could use the terms “incestuous rape” or “incestuous assault” and “consensual incest” to make the distinction? Yes, it may seem silly to report that someone has been arrested for consensual sex, but that’s exactly the point. Nobody should be arrested for consensual sex in the first place.

2. POLYGAMY - Please note that not all polygamy is a religion-based practice between one man and multiple wives. Polygyny means one husband, multiple wives. Polyandry means one wife, multiple husbands. Then there is group marriage, meaning three or more men, or three or more women, or multiple women and multiple men. All of these are polygamy. Not everyone in an going three-or-more-spouses relationship considers themselves polygamous. Some prefer to identify as polyamorous.

Also, please refrain from needlessly associating polygamy or polyamory with negative news. Example: "Polygamous Man Beats Wife." Would you ever write "Monogamous Man Beats Wife?" If you wouldn't call a religious group that insists on monogamy a "monogamous cult" then what is the justification for calling a group that practices plural marriage a "polygamous cult?"

3. MARRIAGE EQUALITY/FREEDOM TO MARRY - Recognizing same-gender or same-sex marriages provides a “freedom to marry.” Recognizing polygamous marriages provides a “freedom to marry.” When an adult can marry any and all other adult(s), that will be marriage equality. Equality just for some is not equality.


Please write to me at fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com or contact me another way I advise here.

Just about everyone I've interviewed or communicated with about their relationships wants to avoid doing anything to put their relationship, their employment, and their freedom at risk. It's a catch-22. More visibility can make things better, but because things are bad, people fear being visible.

If you'd like, I can pass along your information. Let me know:
  • If you want me to publish our information on the blog and on social media or just forward it via email and private messages
  • What relationships are of interest to you
  • What, if anything, you are willing to do to protect identities
  • If you have a vision for the tone of your article or production

If you want to interview or feature polyamorists or a polyamorous family or group, it might be a good idea to contact the Polyamory Media Association:


If I can't copy and paste from your article/editorial, and thus be able to quote you accurately without retyping everything, I won't blog about it, link to it, or share it. So please set up your website accordingly or request your tech people do.

— — —

1 comment:

To prevent spam, comments will have to be approved, so your comment may not appear for several hours. Feedback is welcome, including disagreement. I only delete/reject/mark as spam: spam, vulgar or hateful attacks, repeated spouting of bigotry from the same person that does not add to the discussion, and the like. I will not reject comments based on disagreement, but if you don't think consenting adults should be free to love each other, then I do not consent to have you repeatedly spout hate on my blog without adding anything to the discourse.

If you want to write to me privately, then either contact me on Facebook, email me at fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com, or tell me in your comment that you do NOT want it published. Otherwise, anything you write here is fair game to be used in a subsequent entry. If you want to be anonymous, that is fine.

IT IS OK TO TALK ABOUT SEX IN YOUR COMMENTS, BUT PLEASE CHOOSE YOUR WORDS CAREFULLY AS I WANT THIS BLOG TO BE AS "SAFE FOR WORK" AS POSSIBLE. If your comment includes graphic descriptions of activity involving minors, it's not going to get published.