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Monday, June 20, 2011

Polyamory is Natural and Growing

Melissa-Ann Reyes has a long article about polyamory and some of the different things it means to different people.

“Researchers are just beginning to study the phenomenon, but the few who do estimate that openly polyamorous families in the United States number more than half a million, with thriving contingents in nearly every major city,” according to a Newsweek article from July 29, 2009, “Only You. And You. And You,” by Jessica Bennett.

“Only about twenty percent of American adults…are married, living with their spouse, and, together, bringing up a child or children to which they both have a biological connection,” according to a February 1 2011 article in the Baystate Parent Magazine by Doug Page.

“There is a biological foundation for polyamory, as nature is inherently polyamorous,” Manriquez says. “Non-monogamy is ancient, and it arises in cultures all over the world, in Abrahamic traditions in the Old Testament, in parts of Africa, and in the Arab world.”

I do not think everyone is polyamorous in the sexual sense, but the person who doesn’t need multiple intimate relationships is rare. Think for example, of a lifelong monogamous wife who shares a very close nonsexual lifelong friendship with another woman. That can be considered a form of polyamory. In the sexual, dating, or marital sense, I would say that some people are monogamous, and they should not be doubted or disparaged, just like poly people shouldn’t. Everyone should be free to pursue the life to which they are drawn.

According to Mint, the poly community overlaps with several others, such as the bi community and the kink community. Mint adds that people in the goth, rave, and board- gaming communities have gravitated toward non-monogamy. The three of them agree that the polyamory community, which is growing rapidly in San Francisco, is very women-friendly and gender equitable, marking the distinction between polyamory and the more negative notions of polygamy that are commonplace.

There is discussion in the article about economic/political systems in relation to polyamory. I am not convinced that polyamory is incompatible with capitalism. I see no reason why a capitalist culture can’t support polyamory. Anyway, the focus on this blog is not economic or political paradigms, but rather supporting full marriage equality and the rights of all adults to love, sex, and marriage, worldwide. There is no reason why we could not have full marriage equality in the US, or any Western country, tomorrow.
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