Monday, November 7, 2011

Polyamory and the Spiritual

I don’t spend much time here discussing views on religion or spirituality, aside from what some religious organizations say about sex and marriage. I recognize that people of diverse identifications may support (or oppose, for that matter) full marriage equality. This blog is for the promotion of full marriage equality and related rights, not for promoting a specific religion or spirituality. Atheists, agnostics, freethinkers, Wiccans, Muslims, Hindus, Jews, Christians, Buddhists, Sikhs, Pastafarians… whatever…. If you support full marriage equality, then we can at least agree on that and work to make it happen sooner rather than later.

I bring this up because of “A Dialogue on Sex and Spirit” by Dr. Deborah Taj Anapol, Ph.D. and Taber Shadburne, MA. They talk a little about polyamory, and much about Tantra.

Taj: One of the attractions that sex holds for people is that sometimes it propels us out of the mind into direct experience. But not necessarily. You could engage in sex and be in your head the whole time, or be very focused on the goal of having an orgasm, or a bigger and better orgasm, and not have a spiritual experience at all.

Taber: Sex has the potential to either help liberate us from the ego, or to be a very ego driven activity— probably the primary activity, in fact, that (at least male) egos are preoccupied with!

Taj: So surrounding sex with ritual can be a reminder to approach it from a more conscious place, but it doesn't always work.

Taber: Right, because ego can get very attached to rituals.

Taj: The same thing can happen with multi-partner sex. As I discuss in Polyamory: The New Love Without Limits, the potential is there for a very liberating experience but it can also bring up all kinds of unresolved sexual and relationship issues. If you get identified with the emotions and fail to recognize the opportunity for personal work, it can turn into a nightmare.
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