A Healing Love

We have another exclusive interview to bring you. As this interview is being published, there are still many people spending more time home with family members. Perhaps some of them will find this interview an inspiration? Or they can see this for some possibilities.

People in consanguinamorous relationships are everywhere, though consanguinamorists tend to be closeted. Fortunately, some are willing to be interviewed for this blog. As a result, Full Marriage Equality has featured scores of exclusive interviews with lovers denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law.

The woman interviewed below should be free to legally marry her partner, or simply to live together With him in any place in the world without having to hide, yet she can't. They are consenting adults who aren't hurting anyone; why should they be denied their rights? In much of the world, including where they live, they could be criminally prosecuted for their love.

Read the interview below and see for yourself what “Kaylee” has to say about her love for “Will.” You may think this relationship is interesting, or it might make you uncomfortable, or you might find it ideal, even highly erotic and romantic, but whatever your reaction, should these lovers be denied equal access to marriage or any other rights, or be ostracized simply because they love each other this way?

Prejudice against their relationship for being "incest" is irrational and harmful.

*****

FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Describe yourself.

Kaylee: I was born and raised in the U.K., growing up in the big city, and now living in a smaller town. I am in my mid-twenties, Dad is young for a father of someone my age.

We moved here after I finished school. I studied engineering, more or less inspired by him as he also went down that path, though we chose different specializations. 

Other than that, there's not much else to say about me. I like chess, I am an occasional stoner, I used to take Ballet and Contemporary. These days I mostly just stick to yoga.

Meanwhile, he prefers jogging, and while I've jogged with him before, I truly hate running, so that's mostly something he does on his own.

I do have a younger brother, and my mother is alive and well, but we don't talk to them. We've been estranged for years. 

Our economic background has had its ups and downs but for the most part, we're comfortable now. We have a safety net and are saving up. We have a friend group we hang out with, but this year has been spent primarily with each other, for obvious reasons.

I'm currently living with just my Dad in our flat, as well as our wonderful beagle. No children, and we now live further away from our extended family.

Veterans Day

Today is the Veterans Day holiday in the US.

I can’t help but think of the men and women who risked their lives (and those who gave them) and endured so many things in service to their country, who weren’t and haven’t been free to be who they really are and share their lives openly with the person or persons they love.

Recent years have brought progress, and we have to fight to keep what we've gained while still looking for more progres. Problematic laws and policies remain, and, of course, LGBTQ people, the polyamorous, and consanguinamorous still endure the the threat of prosecution, persecution, or discrimination.

Shouldn’t someone who risked their life for this county be able to marry more than one person, or a biological relative? Or at least share a life with the person(s) he or she loves without a fear that their own government will be against them? Is bravery and valor negated if a man loves more than one woman, or his long lost sister? Shouldn’t a woman who served be free to marry both of the women she loves?

Let’s thank our veterans, especially those who are still being treated as second class citizens.

Intersex Day of Solidarity

Today, November 8, and every day, we stand in solidarity with intersex people. 

It’s Intersex Day of Solidarity.

Our bodies, genders, orientations, and relationships are diverse. Every person should be free to be themselves and to share love, sex, and relationships if and as mutually agreed with others. This includes intersex people. 

Intersex people are not broken. We stand against discrimination against, and persecution of, our intersex friends, family, and neighbors.

Happy Halloween

Halloween is October 31 and it is celebrated widely and diversely here in the US.

Do you have any special plans for Halloween? Have you done or will you do anything fun or interesting this year at a Halloween party or event?

Whatever you do, please be careful as this is a different kind of year. Stay safe!!! 

Here in the states, the stores depend on Halloween to sell a lot of merchandise. In typical years, there are parties, costume contests, what amounts to theatre in front of (and inside, sometimes) the homes of people as they try to scare or entertain neighbors and strangers with things ranging from silly to sexy, spooky to gory. In some places, kids (and often parents) in costumes go from door to door collecting candy or other treats.

Many amusement parks, ranging from small to the largest, do special entertainment in the weeks leading up to Halloween, and this is a favorite time of the year for movie studios to release horror movies, and for broadcasters to show ones from years past. Of course, this year, things have been different.

For some, there are religious or spiritual aspects to the day, and it might be called by other names.

Some interesting things can happen when people are having fun at costume parties, or cuddled up together watching scary movies. With many parties and events cancelled this year, maybe you'll be home with family or other loved ones, watching something good or playing some fund games?

So, as always, feel free to comment or share your plans or stories, including from years past. You can comment anonymously below.

When the Boy Next Door Is Closer Than You Know

Jamliah Lemieux has an advice column, "Care and Feeding," at slate.com that deals with parenting advice. This edition has a letter of interest to this blog. 

"Incest Under Duress" wrote...

Our daughter (17F) sat us down last night and explained that she was in love with the (16M) neighbor next door. Instead of being delighted, as we’ve known the boy since birth and they’ve been friends almost as long, my husband threw a fit and forbade her from seeing him ever again. An argument ensued and our daughter accused my husband of being racist (we’re Filipino and the neighbors are Black.)

But of course that wasn't it.

Right after our daughter was born, my husband and I almost split up; I went through a really hard time between the hormones and the lack of sleep, and when I kicked him out of the house temporarily, he took refuge in other women. I knew this already, but I had no idea he’d slept with the young single mom next door and fathered the boy who would become our daughter’s best friend and, eventually, boyfriend. Our daughter’s new boyfriend is her half-brother.

This happens more than people think. Sometimes it happens through cheating, sometimes from prior relationships or flings. But there are half-siblings in some towns who are unaware they are half-siblings. Sometimes they are drawn to each other.

Documentary Production Looking For GSA-Experienced

Someone behind a documentary production on Genetic Sexual Attraction is looking for cooperation from those experienced in GSA. See below for more information.

It would be great to see documentaries that are not misleading or negative.

As with any other opportunity to work with media, I leave it up to you as to whether or not you should participate. If you are so inclined, reach out to them and at least see if this is something you in which you might want to participate. 

This is their message for you...


***** 

Sometimes things are so controversial that they are hard to understand for people. 

Seeing them in a film can help. 

We believe in the beautiful and complex love behind Genetic Sexual Attraction and want to show the world this. 

Therefore we are looking for the people whose lives have been touched by the Genetic Sexual Attraction phenomenon. People that are willing to share their story with us. A brave thing to do that will help people to stop their preconceptions and truly understand. 

It will not be an informative documentary about the subject GSA. It will be a documentary about a special kind of love. About the power of that love and about the misconceptions and judgement around it. 

The documentary film will be made by award winning filmmaker Sophie Dros. 

The film will be produced by acclaimed production company www.halal.amsterdam

If you have any questions do feel free to contact me at docs@halal.amsterdam

Sincerely,

Tess 

Attention Moms and Sons Experienced in Consanguinamory

There is a screenwriter who wants to communicate with experienced mothers and sons to help with writing characters and relationships accurately for a screenplay. You can remain anonymous. 

Whether I’ve interviewed you or not, whether you’ve been in contact with me before or not, reach out privately if you’re experienced and interested by emailing me at fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com.

Spirit Day is October 15

Thursday, October 15 is Spirit Day. Among varying activities, people wear purple in support of LGBTQ youth, against bullying.

Nobody should be bullied, harassed, or discriminated against because of their gender, sexuality, or relationship diversities or those of their family members or friends.

Are you observing Spirit Day? Leave a comment telling us about it.

How You Can Help

Coming Out Day

Life can be tough for someone whose identity and orientation doesn’t fit in to a little heterosexual, monogamous, "traditional"-gender-role box or whose relationship doesn’t meet the local sex police’s approved standards. Sometimes, a person or the people in a relationship want to come out of the closet. Sometimes they need to come out. For some of these people, it is a little less difficult if they do so as part of a communal event, such as National Coming Out Day.

National Coming Out Day is Sunday, October 11. Here’s the official website, at least for the US. There is much helpful information there, regardless of where you live.

The more people that come out, the more the others around them will realize they do know and appreciate people who are LGBTQ, or polyamorous, or consanguinamorous, and that such people and relationships deserve equality. So coming out helps progress.

On the other hand, it is understandable that any given person, couple, triad, or quad decides to stay in the closet for now. There’s still so much hate, so much prejudice and persecution, and even unjust laws that hinder the life and love of people who are good citizens and just want to be themselves. I support the decision of anyone who believes they need to be reserved for now for the sake of their safety and family.

The decision to come out is yours. Do you want to come out, and to whom? Your friends? Your family? Your coworkers? Your classmates? Your neighbors? Your crush? The whole world?

Also, if someone comes out to you, the decision to be an ally is yours. If your classmate, coworker, neighbor, friend, parent, child, or sibling comes to you and says they are gay, lesbian, bisexual, polysexual, pansexual, transgender, polyamorous, or in a consanguinamorous relationship, what will you do? Will you choose love and acceptance?

Even if you are heterosexual, monogamous, and nonconsanguinamorous, you may want to come out as an ally for full marriage equality. That alone can take courage, but it helps.

If you are planning to come out, or you do come out, please feel free to share your experience here by commenting. You can do so anonymously.

We Get Letters

Every once in a while we feature some of the correspondence we've received. We will never publish private information in which you are identified unless you give us permission. There are many ways to contact Keith, and of course you can comment on entries of this blog, including anonymously. 

These are from comments that were left on this blog. Only one has a "name" chosen by the person commenting. The rest are simply anonymous. 

This was left after an entry about how "incest" can be consensual and positive.

I was in a sexual relationship with my sister for six years through high school and starting college.

Sounds lovely!

It ended when my mother walked in on us. She was outraged and told us we had to stop or she would cut ties with us. She also forced us to keep it a secret.

That's too bad. The secrecy could have been for your own protection, but threatening you was a terrible thing to do.

We are also now both married (to other people) but meet up for time together when we can. I have never felt passion for a woman like I have for my beautiful sister, and it pains me that society forces us to be apart and to hide our relationship from the world and our family.

It's ridiculous that anyone would have to hide their love.

In a modern world, with birth control, there is no need for these antiquated ideals.

With genetic screening and modern science, we're in a much better situation than the past.

I have never talked about this before - with anyone - and it feels truly incredible to share it. Even if it has to be anonymously.

That's one of the great things about this blog. People can share! You won't get judged. We celebrate the beauty of consanguineous love.

When "Incest" is Consanguinamory - a Consensual, Positive Experience

[This is a popular entry from a few years ago, being bumped up because it is still relevant.]

There are people who would have everyone believe that there are no happy consanguinamorous relationships. That romance or eroticism with a close biological relative can only be a bad experience. Over at PFI [a site that doesn't exist anymore... go to Kindred Spirits for an existing place to talk], one discussion participant asked a question and answered it first…

If you could go back in time to where it all started and have the knowledge you do now about what lay ahead of you in this thing called incest, would you still go through with it ??

i've thought about it many times, and the answer i come up is yes i would, sure there are many tears and hard times you go through, but for me the good has always outweighed the bad, life is what you make of it, and we've made a very good life for ourselves....

The first response…

How Has This Blog Helped You? How Can It?

Whether this is your first visit to this blog or you've visited countless times, I'd like to get a comment below (you can comment anonymously or not) or a message from you about how this blog has been of help to you, if it has.

Also, you can use the same method to ask questions you'd like answered, whether you want a private answer or want the answer posted on the blog. This blog is about helping people to be free to have the relationships to which they mutually agree and to be free to live out their gender identity, sexuality, and orientation. Questions that veer away from such matters probably won't get answered.

Depending on your situation, you might not think you have many places to go with your questions or to share what's happening in your life. That's one reason this blog is here and you may contact me.