We Get Letters From Experienced Consanguinamorists

We have two letters to share today from people who've experienced consanguinamorous relationships.

The first was a comment on "Like Parent, Like Child" from someone in an intergenerational relationship...

My mom and I are involved in a relationship. My dad had an accident and became bed ridden. My mom was always busy taking care of him and also doing a lot of works to make the ends meet. In this period I tried to help and support her as much as possible. Eventually we became very close and open to each other. Gradually we started building up attraction to each other. We started acting on that and becoming intimate and we realized what we both want. Though at first it was going on behind my dad's back but my and me both felt guilty about deceiving him so we confessed to him.

This happens more than people think, and it always has; someone in the family becomes incapacitated or passes, and the result is that erotic and romantic energies are redirected. This blog supports polyamory, open relationships, and other forms of ethical nonmonogamy instead of cheating, but the realities of the way things currently are in so many places discourages honesty. Having relationship rights for all will help people avoid getting into situations where cheating seems to be the best option.

And to our surprise he understood our situation and said he has no problem with it as long as we are both happy.

That's wonderful!

So its been going on for a while. My dad passed away few years back.

You have our sympathies.

But my mom and me are helping each other. We live like a couple after moving to a new city.

Moving to where nobody knows of your relation generally makes things much easier for people in consangiunamorous relationships.

We really like to marry if it could be possible.

Congratulations on your love. Someday you'll be able to legally marry. There's no good reason you should be denied your rights.

The second was a comment from someone who'd been in a sibling relationship, responding to a comment left by someone else on our most popular entry, AND GETS SLIGHTLY EXPLICIT...

My sister and I shared an apartment at an out of town university. She is almost 2 years my senior. After about 3 months we started chatting about the ideal partner; shy admitted that she would one day like to have a partner just like me; I had to admit that I regarded her as the ideal model so strive for as a partner. With that the questions of GSA came to the fore, and we talked about it at length (stretching over days).

Oh, to have a journal of those conversations.

Well, to cut a long story short, we decided that we would like to try making love to each other once (more or less as an experiment); we decided that should either have any hangups or reservations afterwards, we would not do it again.

That is a great way to handle things.

We ended up under the shower, soaping in each other, kissing under the water, and drying each other with a towel each. Neither was a dominant one, and we more or less decided simultaneously that we would like to take it to the next step.

As with any other relationship, kisses, embraces, and caresses (even fully clothed) can allow for the boundaries of affection to be explored, and if anyone feels it is best not to continue, it can be stopped. There is nothing requiring anyone commit to anything they're not sure they want to do. Some people decide against intercourse, for example, but continue to enjoy other acts of affection.

The first time was a wonderful experience, and yet we did not just jump into it. Even when I was about to enter her the first time, I asked whether we should continue. She said "yes", and pulled me nearer. Even when I entered her fully, I stopped and asked whether we should proceed, since I could still pull out at that stage. We both agreed to continue.

It was the most erotic experience of our lives.

Many people find that to be the case. Even in many of the GSA cases in which people didn't know of their genetic relation before getting together, they've said the chemistry, connection, and eroticism was more intense than they'd ever experienced before.

The next morning she went to the campus clinic to get the morning after pill, and went on the contraceptive pill.

It was the start of a wonderful relationship, fulfilling in each other's physical and spiritual needs, and we made love almost daily. Sadly it came to an end when she completed her studies and moved away.
Realising that we would not be allowed to marry, we eventually both ended up marrying someone else. I often wonder what the end would have been, had we been allowed to marry.

It's ridiculous that any consenting adults would be denied the right to marry and feel like they have to give up their affections as a result. Sometimes marrying others works out, but sometimes there are problems, in part because the prior relationship was not allowed to run its natural course.

We'd like to hear more from these people and from anyone who has experienced or witnessed similar relationships.