An Open Letter To Those Bothered By Our Existence

Are you bothered by our presence here? Do you find it disagreeable that this blog advocates for the rights of ALL ADULTS to live out their gender, sexuality, and relationship diversities with mutually CONSENTING ADULTS, or by themselves if they prefer? Are you bothered even though we are clearly NOT talking about abuse of anyone, especially not children, and we have explained that equality for all will actually help decrease abuse?

This blog has many followers. Most of the feedback and reaction we get is very positive and appreciative. There is a need for what we’re doing.

If you are bothered by this blog, which is here to advocate for equality and civil rights for all adults, there are many ways you can choose to react, some good and some terrible:

Celebrating International Consanguinamory Day

April 28 is a day to celebrate and to affirm consanguinamory. 

People who are consanguinamorous or in consanguinamorous relationships shouldn't have to hide.

Consanguinamory has always been part of the human experience, wherever people have been, regardless of location, class, or demographics. 

Consanguinamory isn't shameful. It is quite often a beautiful thing. 

Consenting adults should be free to love each other how they mutually agree, and shouldn't have to hide their love. They should be free to share their love and be true to themselves, without being prosecuted, persecuted, or discriminated against. 

To all consanguinamorous people:

Most of you have to keep your celebrations private, but we know you're out there, and you are valid and deserve your rights. Monday, April 28 is your day. Progress is being made. Let's make more!

Consanguinamorists Are Part of Society

Bigots against consanguinamory frequently bring up rare examples of individuals or an isolated family in which there has apparently been many generations of close inbreeding, and the problems these individuals or families have. This is supposed to be justification for discriminating against the consanguinamorous.

This is as ridiculous as saying something like, "Look up Scott Peterson" as to why non-consanguinamorous relationships are bad.

Most consanguinamorous relationships are between people like your neighbors, co-workers, classmates, and "ordinary" people you know. You know healthy, bright, attractive, friendly people whose parents are close genetic relatives, whether you know their true genetic parentage or not. They might not even know. Meanwhile, there are people who have inherited serious genetic diseases and their parents were not close genetic relatives.

It is also important to remember that "birth defects" can be caused by many things, including environment, abuse, substances ingested by parents, and other factors.

Two or more closely related individuals wanting to share sex, romance, a residence, or marriage is not the same thing as many generations of isolated inbreeding.

We have examples. For example, we can compare births in US states that have no criminal laws against consanguinamory to states with strict laws against consanguinamory. Spoiler: states that do not criminalize consanguinamory do not have a higher genetic disease rate than states that criminalize first cousins for having sex.

Instead of continuing the discriminate against lovers, we should be encouraging the use of modern science and technology to prevent, mitigate, and treat what is of concern.

It is also important to reject ableist bigotry that dehumanizes people with certain genetic conditions.

This blog does not encourage anyone to literally or figuratively isolate themselves from the rest of society and inbreed in perpetuity for generation after generation, so citing examples of that misses the point.

There simply is no good reason to deny 

consanguineous lovers their fundamental rights, including full marriage equality.

As always, feel free to comment below, which can be done anonymously.

Consanguinamory Day is April 28 - Consider Making Plans

There are countless ways to observe or celebrate Consanguinamory Day, which falls each year on 4/28 or 28/4 depending on how you write dates. You still have time to make plans for this year's observance on the last Monday of this month. Celebrate consanguinamory!

Bring up to the topic of consanguinamory and/or consanguinamorous people in your discussions.

Do something to advance rights.

Become an ally.

Come out as an ally to specific people you know.

Come out as an ally in general.

Come out as consanguinamorous.

Initiate consanguinamory into a relationship.

Rekindle a consanguinamorous relationship.

Celebrate your ongoing consanguinamorous relationship.

Display The Lily.

Start planning now! If you'd like to discuss your plans with Keith, contact him via email at fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com or on Wire at fullmarriageequality. You can also leave a comment with your plans or your suggestions to others by using the comments feature below.

Missed Opportunities

Do you have stories to share about missed opportunities?

Sometimes, flirtation and other hints or what we call “testing the waters” are missed or misinterpreted. This is also, even especially, true when it comes to close relatives or family members, or others that might be considered “taboo” or “off limits,” such as:

• a sibling’s, parent’s, or son/daughter’s friend or lover (current or former)
• a current or past lover’s sibling, parent, son/daughter, or friend
• a friend’s sibling, parent, or son/daughter

And those situations could have been potentially cheating, or done with the agreement of all, or even an attempt for a threesome or moresome.

This applies whether you raised or were raised with or by your genetic relative or not; adoptive or step relatives also count.

1) Do you suspect or know you missed one or more opportunities with a relative or other “taboo” potential partner? (Hindsight can often reveal these, if not noticed or understood at the time.)

2) Did you miss an opportunity to make a move or a pass because you hesitated or didn’t work up the nerve?

3) Did you flirt, hint, or make a move but the other person didn’t catch on, or thought you were only joking, or rebuffed it?

Whether anything like the above delayed the connection and it eventually happened or denied it and it never happened, it counts for my query.

Comment below or contact me privately. I can be reached at fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com. I’m very responsive so if you don’t hear back from me after a day or so, check your spam or junk folder. I never share what someone tells me privately without their permission.

 
Maybe one of these things is going on right now or happened recently. If you need help with that, we can talk about that. 

Of course, if you eventually did get together I’ve long been encouraging people with experience to contact me. Now is as good of a time as any. But this post was mostly so I could read more about missed opportunities.

Need some examples?

Here are a few, but anything that might fit the above criteria is welcome.

Is a Woman Unable to Consent to Marry Her Sibling?

[Bumping this up because it is still revelant.] I take the idea of consenting adults seriously. An adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race, or religion should be free to share love, sex, kink, residence, and marriage (or any other legal union offered) with any and all consenting adults.

This does not mean I think any given person is a good match for any other person, or that they are treating each other right. It just means whether or not they have a relationship and what they do together should be up to them, not anyone else.

Our laws are inconsistent about this. A 22-year-old woman living below the poverty level can legally consent to sign a prenuptial agreement and legally marry a 60-year-old male billionaire. She can have sex with the President of the United States, who obviously has much more power than her. The law in many places allows her to marry a complete stranger. Also, in most places, she can legally live with and consent to sex with a man who has what amounts to a harem, or she can consent to group sex with several weightlifting champions she’s never met before, or an older man who’s been her next-door neighbor since she was born and babysat her throughout her childhood, and is now living on death row as a convicted murderer. That’s all legal. However, in many places she’s still barred from legally marrying another 22-year-old woman, and in even more places, she is still barred from having consensual sex with, let alone marrying a full or half sibling, even if they weren’t raised together. I have yet to hear a reason justifying such discrimination that withstands scrutiny.

Some tweets were directed to me by a thoughtful person questioning brother-sister marriage, and those tweets deserve responses longer than I could post there, so I’m putting my response here.

National Siblings Day

April 10 is National Siblings Day, at least here in the US. 

In keeping with the interests of this blog, we want to celebrate all people who love their siblings, especially if that includes supporting your sibling as they face discrimination for their gender identity,  their sexual or relationship orientations, or their relationships or sexuality.

We also want to celebrate all siblings in consanguinamorous relationships. For many of them, there is no more important person in the world than their sibling(s).

So if you have a good sibling, let them know you appreciate them.

Here's one of many interviews I've done with consanguinamorous siblings. There are more here.

If you have siblings or children or a parent or some other close relative or friends in such a sibling relationship, this is for you.

Sometimes middle-aged siblings experience a change in their relationship dynamic. Unfortunately, siblings are still denied their freedom to marry in most of the world.

Finally, there is some really wonderful, painfully realistic fiction about a sibling relationship.

Comment below or email fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com if you have something you want to share about your sibling(s).

New to This Blog or Looking to Find Out More?

We support the rights of an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race, or religion, to share love, sex, kink, residence, and marriage (and any other union offered by law), and any of those things without the others, with any and all consenting adults, without fear of prosecution, bullying, or discrimination. These are basic human rights under a system of gender equality and it shouldn't matter who is disgusted by the relationships of other adults or who doesn't understand why the adults would want to be together. Inherent in these rights is the right to NOT be in a relationship, NOT to marry, and to divorce or leave a relationship.

If you're viewing the desktop/laptop version, you'll see that over there in the column on the right you can find ways to connect and to follow this blog, and at the top of the page are tabs with drop-downs of some important pages, entries, and links. If you're viewing a mobile version, many of the links are below.

You are welcomed and affirmed here regardless of your gender, sexuality, or relationship diversities, and whether you are looking for more information, are in the closet or out about your gender, sexual orientation, or relationship, or want to be an ally. Are you here because of polyamory or polygamy? Perhaps you're here because this blog covers Genetic Sexual Attraction or consanguinamory (consensual incest) or because you think or know your partner has been involved? Do you need help? Whether you're a family member or friend who is looking for more information, or a journalist, or are someone who is looking to help the cause, we hope you are helped by what is here.

There's an About This Blog page, and you can read about the triad who originally inspired this blog.

There's a Glossary so that you can become familiar with terms frequently used here.

We explain why we need solidarity in supporting full marriage equality and we debunk all the arguments that you'll ever hear made against equality, so if you're against equal rights, please carefully read through that page.

On the Case Studies page we feature interviews with people who have been denied their rights, so you can "meet" people who are, or have been, in consensual loving relationships who have are harmed by the lack of equality under the law.

This blog is a labor of love. There's no advertising and we don't accept monetary contributions. Want to help? Spread the word. If you are a lawyer, attorney, or someone who works with a legal group or law firm, we'd like to hear from you if you are supportive. Also, this blog DOES accept content submissions (Keith can be contacted at... fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com), but makes no offer, implicit nor explicit, of compensation nor guarantees that it will be used. If you want to tell your story, that would be very helpful to others!

Tell us what you think by commenting or by contacting us.

Join our Facebook group "I Support Full Marriage Equality."

Keith wants to be friends with all who support full marriage equality and relationship rights for all adults. Be Facebook friends with Keith.

Follow the X (Twitter) account for this blog.

If you don't want to connect, still feel free to send Keith a note at fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com

Myths about Genetic Sexual Attraction
Ten Myths About Sibling Consanguinamory
Bad Reasons to Deny Love
Ten Reasons Why Consensual Incest is Wrong (Sarcastic) 

NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #9

“They’re abusive.” Interracial, (adult) intergenerational, same-gender, polyamorous, and consanguinamorous relationships are not inherently abusive. It is the abusive relationships in general that are more likely to make news, or come to the attention of therapists or law enforcement. There are many people in "forbidden" relationships that are lasting, happy, healthy relationships.

Abusive people are the cause of abuse, not a relationship or marriage. There are many same-age, same-race, heterosexual, monogamous, nonconsanguineous relationships and marriages in which someone is abused. We have several examples showing that outlawing consensual behavior correlates to an increase in problems as people try to avoid law enforcement and other authorities. Marriage equality will most certainly reduce abuse, as abuse victims can go to the authorities with much less fear. So the solution isn’t the status quo, it is in bringing the relationships out of the shadows, allowing them to be protected and made official, and prosecuting abusers. Abuse victims will be much more forthcoming.

There is no good reason to deny an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race or religion, the right to share love, sex, residence, and marriage (or any of those without the others) with any and all consenting adults without prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.

Feel free to share, copy and paste, and otherwise distribute. This has been adapted from this page at Full Marriage Equality: http://marriage-equality.blogspot.com/p/discredited-invalid-arguments.html

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny Love #8 

Go to NOT a Good Reason to Deny (Polyamorous) Love #10

We Get Letters

This blog gets comments on many posts.

I wanted to print this comment here because I couldn’t publish it in its original form as I needed to redact a word.

I’m trying to keep things here as “safe for work” as possible, and certain combinations of letters prompt filters to kick in.

 

Left after this entry…

https://marriage-equality.blogspot.com/2016/12/it-runs-in-family.html

…was this comment:

My mother had a sexual relationship with her own biological father. She always said he was her favorite lover. Growing up she was in an open relationship with my father. She never hid her sexual relationship with her father.

Mom often talked about her father using her and he encouraged her to be free sexually.

When I was home from the navy she and I had a few drinks, I admitted that I wanted to make love to her. We did. It was awesome, loving, kinky.

She had a friend who was sexually active with her own son so we often hung out and often played together. Her friend’s son was thin but mom loved his big c—-.

Thank you for sharing that, Anonymous. Congratulations on your experiences.

Anyone can submit comments after entries on this blog. You can also email Keith at fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com.