“Could We Still Get in Trouble?”

A comment by “Thomas” was left on one of our most popular entries, about aunts and nephews.

Me and my aunt have a wonderful relationship. We are best friends, also lovers and have been for quite some time. We live in Connecticut where marriage is illegal but we don't want to get married. Could we still get in trouble for being in a relationship? 

First of all, congratulations on your love. May it increase and endure. Consanguinamory is a beautiful thing.

The short answer, unfortunately, is yes. You could still get in trouble.

However, the odds are in your favor and you can make them even better.

For now, it remains illegal in Connecticut for aunts and their adult nephews to have sex.

But most people in these relationships are never prosecuted.

While most people in these relationships are never even arrested for consanguinamory, the larger problem is that harassment, oppression, and discrimination are enabled by criminalization. Criminalization also prevents things like getting effective counseling and therapy, among so many other things.

There is no good reason you shouldn't be free to be open about your relationship and free to marry. We need full marriage equality nationwide. But until then, you need to be careful. If moving to a country where consanguinamory isn't criminalized, or the states of Rhode Island or New Jersey, makes sense, you might want to do that.

Thomas, we'd love to hear more about your relationship. Know that you or anyone in a similar position can contact me via email at Fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com

It's outrageous that consenting adults have to hide that they love each other, but that's where we still are as society. While some other people can be open and honest about their relationships and love lives, you have to be careful. Here are a couple of more links that might help you protect yourself:

How to Pull Off Living Together

Keeping the Closet Door Closed
You may have some advice or tips we haven't thought about, so please share them below in the comments or by email.