Thursday, October 6, 2016

Jane Expresses Solidarity

Our dear friend Jane has done it again. If you don't follow her blog, which is primarily about consanguinamory, you should! Here's her latest, about the overlap between consanguinamory and polyamory (which would include people like this)...
I would wager that poly regulars are usually more open minded than mono regulars because they also face discrimination and bashing from society.
While that may be the case for more polyamorous people than the general population, there are still some polyamorous people who are prejudiced against consanguinamorous people. But then, there are consangs who are prejudiced against polyamorous people. Jane does go on to note that. It's unfortunate. Solidarity is the way to go. We need solidarity to secure and protect the rights of all adults.
Another reason I bring it up is to break down some of the negative stereotypes. Consanguinamorous people are often described as ‘desperate’, where poly people have been stereotyped as sexually immoral or promiscuous, which is far from the truth. There are many closed polycules where there is no cheating going on, cheating is STILL AGAINST THE RULES in polyamory. It’s not about how many people they can shag and get away with it, it’s about developing and maintaining multiple loving relationships in an arrangement that everyone is happy with. Likewise consanguinamorous people are clearly NOT in such relationships due to being unable to find anyone else, we end up in such relationships because of the overwhelming double-love we feel. It is frustrating to many people that such assumptions are made with so little thought. I realize that making assumptions is sometimes human nature, but come on people, REALLY?
Click through to read the whole thing.

On the flip side of throwing each other under the bus is the reality that some people who are in one of these categories are more likely to experiment in the other. It is likely more the general population would, but they've internalized prejudices an thus artificially limit their sexuality for no good reason. Some people who are polyamorous or consanguinamorous realize that crossing one "taboo" didn't end the world, and was even of great benefit, so so they are more willing to put aside similar prejudices about the other category. Again, that's only some. Some people are monogamous, and being consanguinamorous will never change that, while others are polyamorous and have a strong experience with the Westermarck Effect and will never have any interest in consanguinamory (at least, outside of Genetic Sexual Attraction).

The bottom line to all of this is that no matter what your boundaries, attractions, orientation, or turn-offs, we should all support the rights of all adults to be treated equally, with the freedom to pursue their relationships.

More Reading: The Invisible Asterisk
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