Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Ex Wife Wants to Make an Issue of Ex-BIL's Marriage

Someone in Illinois asked at for legal answers regarding...
Recourse in keeping child from first cousin incestuous marriage exposure in Illinois: can I use this as a reason to get custody?

Let's get the details.
I live in Illinois, where marriage between first cousins is illegal.

Right, they have to both be over 50 or one has to be infertile. In almost half of the rest of the states, first cousins can legally marry without those conditions.
My ex-husband's brother married their first cousin, who was born in a foreign country.

Got that? It isn't something her ex is doing, it is that her ex's brother is married to his first cousin.

Now that my daughter has reached puberty, I am very concerned about her constant exposure to this aunt and uncle. They knowingly lied on their marriage certificate (denying that they were first cousins) & they have 2 children (one of whom is a boy also just hitting puberty). Note that the aunt got her green card through this marriage.

They have children together so it isn't like this was just a relationship for immigration purposes. And notice the children are fine. She would have mentioned it if they weren't.
I'm concerned that my daughter is growing up thinking that incest is acceptable, that lying to the U.S. government on legal documents is acceptable, and possibly even that she is being encouraged to have an inappropriate relationship with her cousin. 
First cousin relationships are acceptable. They're legal in all but a few US states, they are legal and common in many places in the world, and humanity has a long history of first cousin relationships. Majority opinion is that they are acceptable.

Lying to the U.S. government for immigration purposes? This blog is not about that, so I won't even touch that allegation.

That she is "possibly" "being encouraged" to have a relationship (in appropriate in the writer's opinion) with her cousin? How about she raise her daughter to make her own decisions about her relationships?
Can I use this as a reason to sue for custody?
There are people out there molesting and beating their children, and she's grasping as this straw?

There were a few responses when I retrieved this question.

Gary L. Schlesinger, Child Custody Lawyer - Libertyville, IL...
i doubt that this is a reason to get custody because your husband's brother married his first cousin.

you have to prove that contact with this aunt and uncle, which apparently has been on going, somehow now seriously endangers your child.

Judy A. Goldstein,Child Custody Lawyer - Mokena, IL...
It is highly unlikely that your daughter's uncle's marriage to his first cousin would be a basis for seeking custody unless the child was somehow endangered by her father, not by her uncle or her uncle's wife. If you are concerned about your daughter's morals and ethics, then teach her so that she knows right from wrong.
It's going to be a hoot if she tells her daughter first cousins should not marry, but the daughter see's her uncle's marriage as really great.

Anthony Bettencourt Cameron, Criminal Defense Attorney - Quincy, IL...
The other two lawyers have given you good answers. In addition, it matters why you do not have custody now and how long it has been since the custody order. The first two years after a custody order, it takes a really consequential emergency situation to support a change. I think you had better look for a better basis.

Joseph Pierce O'Brien, Child Custody Lawyer - Wheaton, IL...
The court will determine who gets custody by looking at what serves the best interests of the children. However, if a custody judgment has already been entered, it is very difficult to modify custody, you must show serious endangerment. Outside of 2 years, the standard is a little bit easier, but you must show change in circumstances and that changing custody is in the best interests of the kids. I would recommend at consulting with a divorce attorney so that more fact can be presented and the right course of action can be taken here.
The prejudice against cousin couples continues. There are supposedly educated people who think that they're illegal everywhere, or that they don't know anyone who is married to their cousin. Meanwhile, if they looked through their ancestry they might be very surprised. There is no good reason to deny that an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race, or religion, should be free to share love, sex, residence, and marriage (or any of those without the others) with any and all consenting adults.

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