Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Slurs Against Polyamory

On Yahoo Answers, I found a rambling statement from someone who seemed upset. This is how it started:

Polyamory is just glossed-over, Blinged, glorified whoring around by a bunch of middle-aged yuppies/yippies who never grew up and their wives decided to go look for other lovers.

I think the writer was lashing out in pain (read the rest of it), but there are a lot of other people who calmly express such ignorance and close-mindedness, often unprompted. This is the kind of thing that has prevented marriage equality.

Why do people trash the sexuality and relationships of others? If people who love each other agree that it is okay to have relationships with others, either alone or together, why does that bother someone else who isn’t even involved? Jealousy? Envy? Mean-spiritedness? Who you love and who you marry should be nobody else’s concern.

One could just as easily say something stupid like “Monogamy is just glorified selfishness and possessiveness.” Or “Abstinence is just dressed-up laziness or rejection.”

Polyamory is not cheating. It isn’t necessarily swinging, although swinging can be involved. That is why there are different words: because they are different.

Want to be monogamous? That’s fine. Be with someone else who wants to be monogamous, and leave the polyamorous people alone.
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