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Saturday, June 5, 2010

Being Polyamorous Doesn’t Mean A Lack of Standards

Polyamory Paradigm had a great discussion about certain misperceptions about polyamorous people.

If you are Polyamorous you have probably had a conversation with someone who thought Poly meant you slept around with whomever you wanted. Maybe they confused Polygamy or Swing with Polyamory.

Not all polyamorous people are swingers. Other examples are given.

This person knows you are Poly and able to start a new relationship basically anytime you like. But like the second example above, they don't understand why someone who is completely available to having a relationship wouldn't be interested in having one with them. Again the result is often some form of hostility.

Nobody likes being rejected. But people need to understand that just because someone is with more than one person doesn’t mean they want to be with any person. It is the same as with monogamous people who are not in a relationship. Very few enter into a relationship with anyone who asks.

In many ways Poly people are no different from anyone else. They aren't going to be attracted to anyone and everyone. And despite the fact they are very possibly available for a relationship that doesn't mean they will have one with anyone and everyone.

Amen.
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