Living in a Marriage That's Denied Equality

People in consanguinamorous relationships are everywhere, though consanguinamorists tend to be closeted. Fortunately, some are willing to be interviewed for this blog. As a result, Full Marriage Equality has featured scores of exclusive interviews with lovers are denied the freedom to be open about their love and are, by law, denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law.

The man and woman interviewed below should be free to legally marry, yet they can't, and they could be imprisoned and have their lives ruined if they were outed to the wrong people. They are consenting adults who aren't hurting anyone and have been raising a child together; why should they be denied their rights? In much of the world, including all but a a few US states, they could be criminally prosecuted for their love

Read the interview below and see for yourself what this couple has to say. You may think this relationship is interesting, or it might make you uncomfortable, or you might find it ideal, even highly erotic and romantic, but whatever your reaction, should these lovers be denied equal access to marriage or any other rights simply because they enjoy what we call double love?


WARNINGS: Mildly explicit sexuality.

*****

FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Describe yourselves.

Brother: I am currently in IT with the federal government. We live in the suburbs outside a major metro area. I am 30, 6'4" and 230. Brown hair and gray eyes that tend to change color with what I am wearing. I have a masters degree, one sibling, and our daughter.

We were born and raised on the west coast, but moved a lot growing up both domestically and internationally. So we got to experience a lot of different cultures.

Sister: I am a paralegal with a local law firm, I am living with my brother and our daughter. I am 29, 5'4", dirty blond hair, soccer mom.


FME: Are you married or have you ever been legally and/or ceremonially married?

Sister: We are not married in the full legal sense, but we did exchange rings and vows to each other. So for us we are husband and wife.

Brother: I am currently hunting on the dark web for ways to get married officially. We want our love to be official, and to know that we are legally required to wake up next to each other. Bonus points if you can name the movie that's from.


FME: How would you describe your sexual orientation and your relationship orientation... are you heterosexual, bisexual, what? Are you a monogamist, polyamorist, or....?

Brother: I am just starting to experiment with being bi.

Sister: I've had bi experiences since high school. I first had sex with my BFF, and have always enjoyed being able to be with and pleasure other women. [Brother] is my soul mate, but he understands and accepts when I need to play.


FME: This is a sexual relationship between a brother and sister? Are you full siblings?

Brother: Yes, we are full genetic first siblings enjoying a fully sexual relationship with each other.

Sister: I am in a spousal/sexual relationship with my full brother.


FME: Did you grow up together?

Sister: Yes we were both raised together.


FME: What was your childhood like? What was family life like? Were alternative lifestyles/sex discussed in your family, and if so, how? Can you describe your sexual awakening?

Sister: Our childhoods and family life growing up were pretty normal. Our dad worked for a big defense contractor, so we had a good middle/upper-middle home and such. I don't really remember sex being openly talked about; other then when Mom gave me the "talk" when I finally got my period. My sexual awakening was probably when I was twelve, and masturbated for the first time.

Brother: Dad never gave me the "talk", he just left a book under my pillow for me to read.

Sister: Dad never talked to you, and I had to listen to Mom drone on and on about what I should not be doing? Boys!

Brother: As for my sexual awakening it was the first night I read that book. I was twelve almost thirteen, and it described how to masturbate in detail. So after everyone was asleep, I stripped naked, and gave myself my first orgasm.


FME: How did sexual affection become a part of your relationship? Was it a sudden event or a gradual process? Did you know ahead of time it was going to turn sexual or was it more spontaneous? Is it clear who made the first move? When did you notice an attraction?

Sister: For me it was when our parents were out one Saturday morning, and I was walking past [Brother's] room. His door was ajar, and I could see him [masturbating], but it was when he [reached orgasm] and moaned out my name that things changed for me. That was when I saw him as more than my brother. I saw him as the person I wanted my first time to be with, and to learn about sex with.

Brother: Oh it was all [Sister] that made the first move. I still blush when she tells this story. I had been noticing her going through puberty, and growing boobs, getting hips, and everything. I had been snooping in her underwear drawer, and knew she was a 32A by then.

Sister: I also had our first time all planned out. I knew our parents were going out to a party, and would be leaving us alone for the night. [Brother] and I were watching cable, and flipped to Cinemax which was showing a softcore porn movie. I said I had never seen one before even though I had on the computer. While we watched it, I started rubbing his thigh. We glanced at each other, but still watched the movie. When I started rubbing [his penis], he looked at me and asked what I was doing.

I said nothing I didn’t want to, and if he liked it he should kiss me. He smiled at me, leaned in, and kissed me.

I brushed my tongue on his lips, and he opened his mouth so we could properly French kiss.  I grabbed his hand and put it on my boob. I had to break the kiss and tell him it was OK to play with me. He then started playing with both.

After a little while we were so hot that I had to undress him, and he undressed me. I was so excited when he finally got to see special black undies I was wearing just for him. My bra was front hooking, so he had no trouble opening it. I pulled his head towards me, and he latched on.

We swapped places, I got on my knees, and [fellatio ensued]. He didn't last longer than a minute (sorry Baby).

Afterwards we cuddled on the sofa talking about what just happened. [Brother] was worried he took advantage of me, and I reassured him that he could not have. When I told him my feelings for him, and how badly I wanted to be with him, and rolled me on my back, moved down to my waist, and started [cunnilingus]. I had not expected him to do this, but it was the most intense feeling I had ever felt. He made me [orgasm] three times quickly. I had to grab his head and pull him up because [I was] just too sensitive.

I could feel that he was hard again by then, so I took hold of him, and [positioned him]. We looked at each other, he asked me if I was really sure this is what I wanted. I shoved my tongue in his mouth again, locked my legs around his butt, and pushed him into me. It did hurt for a bit when he first entered me, and he could see it on my face. So once he was in, he stopped and waited for me to get used to it.

Now us being the horny teenagers we were, we never thought of getting a condom. I probably should have gotten some since this was my idea, but I didn't and he sure wasn't thinking of it. We are pretty sure we got pregnant that night. We had intercourse twice more that night.


Brother: I did not know what she was planning. I did know how sexy I thought she was, and how much I wanted to see her naked. I don't think I knew what incest was back then. I just knew my sister was hot, and I wanted to see as much of her as I could.

Sister: You are the sweetest. I was a jumble of emotions, and feelings. I didn't dare tell my Mom I wanted to have sex with my brother, and if I told any of my friends it would be all over school in five minutes. So I did want any horny teen would do, I went to the Internet. Thankfully we didn't have filters back then, so I had free range. I was able to read up on enough to get an understanding on what was happening, and how to take care of it.


FME: Before this had you ever thought this would be possible or enjoyable; did you have any opinion one way or the other about close relatives or family members being together?

Sister: No I had no idea. Like [Brother] I was not aware of what incest was, or that siblings were off limits so to speak. I was still at the age of thinking about my parents having sex as gross. I might have had a fleeting thought about Dad a few times, but nothing serious.

Brother: Same as with [Sister]. And never had a desire with any other family members.


FME: How do you describe the sex now? Taboo? Natural? Especially erotic? Some people say familial eroticism is inherently kinky, but I have found that for many it doesn't feel kinky. What about for you?

Brother: Sex with [Sister] is still as good as it was back then. I think it's the taboo aspect of it; just knowing I get to [do it with] my baby sister still to the day makes me really hot for her. The sex does have a kink factor to it too, I mean how could it not? I'm in bed with my sister; that alone is pretty kinky. To this day [Sister] is the best sex I have ever had.

Sister: [Brother] is the best. I feel the same way. It's the taboo/kink aspect that never fails to get me aroused. Ever after all these years together, we still mess around like we're still teenagers, and it's still the best sex I've ever had.


FME: Describe your relationship now. Is this a marriage, boyfriend/girlfriend, family-with-benefits, or what? Do you see each other as family or lovers, or are those two roles inseparable at this point?

Sister: We are married in all ways but the piece of paper. We are family, lovers, confidants, equals. If you did not know us, you would have no clue we are brother/sister. We are as normal as any other couple/parents.


FME: Is this relationship closed or are either if you open to new partners?

Brother: We like to play with others. As I said I am starting to test my bi side. [Sister] said it would be hot to watch me with another guy, so I’m going to see how it goes. None of the others we have been with know we are related. We have not been with anyone long enough to build a strong enough bond to tell them that.

Sister: [Brother] is right, I think it would be damn hot to see him with a guy, and I'm glad he's willing to try it for me. I am still living bisexually, and love bringing a girl home to play. [Brother] loves it to since he gets to watch, and sometimes join in. I have not told anyone (not even my BFF in school) what we have been doing. I actually think I get off better knowing she has no clue she is watching incest right in front of her eyes.


FME: Does anyone in your life know the full, true nature of your relationship

Sister: Our parents know all about us. When I got pregnant, [Brother] and I decided we had no choice but to tell them everything. They were not happy to learn their kids were sleeping together, and were dumb enough not to be using protection. But after a lot of research and family discussions we all decided that [Brother] and I would keep the baby.


FME: Having to hide the full nature of your relationship from some people can be a disadvantage. Can you describe how that has been? Are there any other disadvantages? Conversely, do you think consanguineous relationships have some advantages and some things better than unrelated lovers?

Brother: We stayed local for school, saying [Sister] and the baby needed to be close to our parents and we wanted to save money. We used a story of [Sister] having a one night stand and the condom failing. Once we graduated and decided we wanted to live together on our own, we did have to move away to a new state where no one knew us, and we could be the normal young family.

Sister: The disadvantages would be having to lie to just about everyone we know. We do feel bad about having to do it, but it's not our fault for falling in love with each other. [Brother] and I do think that consanguineous relationships do have advantages as well. We already loved each other when we started. We basically knew everything about each other already. We have our sibling bond with we have found only reinforces our love and romantic bond.


FME: What do you want to say to people who disapprove of your relationship, or disapprove of anyone having this kind of relationship? What's your reply to those who would say that this is one of you preying on the other and that you can’t truly consent?

Sister: We would like to tell them to go piss up a rope. No one but maybe our parents have any right to say anything to us about what they think is right or wrong. We are not hurting anyone. Our relationship, bond, or family are zero threat to you, so take your opinion and shove it. I'm not sure how you can say a younger sister is "preying" on her older brother.

Brother: Totally agree with [Sister]. She was not preying on me, and if I did not consent to it I would not have let her [perform fellatio] that first night.


FME: You’ve already indicated you have a daughter. How is she?

Sister: We have a bright, beautiful, highly intelligent, and fiercely loyal daughter, who, yes, has one head, ten fingers, and ten toes.


FME: What would you say to something who says close relatives shouldn't be allowed to have children?

Brother: I would tell them that almost everything you hear and read about it being harmful is bunk. Science today is a lot more advanced than it was 30 or so years ago. If close relatives want to have kids, I would say get a genetic screening done just to be sure, but chances are you won't have anything to worry about. 


FME: Aside from the law, which I think is ridiculous, can you think of anything that would make relationships like this inherently wrong?

Brother: Nothing at all. Love is love. If it is a brother/sister, mother/son, father/daughter, mother/daughter, any other combo out there, or two strangers who met at a bar. If two people, regardless of relation or sex, fall in love then there is no reason at all to stop them from freely showing that love for each other.

Sister: He is 100% right. No one should have the right to stop anyone who loves another person from being with that person.


FME: If you could get legally married, and that included protections against discrimination, harassment, etc., would you?

Sister: I would marry him today if we could. As we said, we are married in every way except having a piece of paper from the state. And I can live with that. Would I have liked to have had the wedding of my dreams? Sure. But what [Brother] and I have built is more than enough for me, too.
 
Brother: Exactly what she said.


FME: What advice do you have for someone who wants to be with their brother or sister?

Brother: Go slow and decide if it's just a passing fancy, or if you really do want to have a sexual relationship with a relative. It's a door that can't be closed once it's been opened. I will say our first time was pure lust, but then [Sister] and I talked, and we shared our wants and desires and learned that we both had far deeper feeling for each other then just brother and sister.

Sister: I would agree with [Brother]; however for me it was not lust. I knew by then I deeply loved the big lug and only ever wanted to be with him sexually. I would also say if you are inexperienced with sex when you begin; that you figure out how to do some of the basics first.


FME: What advice do you have for family members and friends who think or know that relatives they know are having these feelings for each other?

Brother: Let them be. If they want to be together; then who are you to say otherwise. Are they being together personally hurting you in some way?


FME: Any plans for the future?

Sister: Yes in fact. I just passed my first trimester for our next baby. Now that we are settled in our own home, [Brother] and I decided it was time to expand our family.


FME: Anything else to add?

Sister: I have zero regrets or second thoughts for how my life has turned out. I would not change a single aspect of anything that has happened. I am married to the best person I know, who loves me, our daughter, and our new child with every fiber of his being. And who I know would die to protect us from harm. He is my rock and my soulmate, and I consider myself the luckiest woman alive that he is also my big brother.

Brother: That chokes me up. I can not add anything to what [Sister] said. It is all true, and I am so grateful every day that she picked a big lump like me to spend her life with.

*****


Clearly, these lovers are consenting adults who aren't hurting anyone, practically married in every way except the law, and yet they can't even exercise their basic human right to marry, even though they are living as spouses. They are happy and in love, yet they are denied that fundamental right to marry. They can't even be open about their love!

Why should they be denied their rights? There’s no good reason.We need to recognize that all adults should be free to be with any and all consenting adults as they mutually consent, and part of doing that is adopting relationship rights for all, including full marriage equality sooner rather than later. People are being hurt because of a denial of their basic human rights to love each other freely.

You can read other interviews I have done here. As you'll see, there are people from all walks of life who are in consanguinamorous relationships.

If you are in a relationship like this and are looking for help or others you can talk with, read this.
If you want to be interviewed about your "forbidden" relationship, connect with me by checking under the "Get Connected" tab there at the top of the page or emailing me at fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com.

If you are concerned about pregnancies between close relatives, read this. If you know someone who is in a relationship like this, please read this.

Thank you to Brother and Sister for doing this interview! We wish you well in your consanguinamorous marriage and in your pregnancy and parenting. May the strength of your double bond grow.