Tuesday, February 3, 2015

Polyamory, Polygamy, and Bisexuality

Here are three items dealing with polyamory. First up is a question by lasuz at who asks women for their willingness to participate in polygyny (plural marriage)...
Ladies would you be open to being a "sister wife". What would be the advantages or disadvantages? What would be your families reaction?
Some of the advantages or disadvantages to any relationship will have to do with the individuals involved. However, with polyfidelitous relationships in general, regardless of genders, there can be a bigger support network, which can be an enormous advantage. A disadvantage can be coordinating schedules. As far as reactions from family... well, it would be nice if the whole family would be supportive of their adult child or sibling's relationships (and their gender identity and sexual orientation in general), but that isn't always going to happen.

The answers, when I checked, were mostly along the lines of "I couldn't share."

From Nathan Manske at comes this wonderful story of a gay triad that has lasted decades.

Bob Lanning

Bob Lanning is quoted about his relationship with Don, an airline pilot who was often gone...

In 1971, when I was managing a bar in San Diego, Keith came in — his ship was stationed down there — and he came in in uniform, and when I saw him walk through that door in his Dixie cup and white uniform, I said, “Oh, my god, I’m having that sailor.” … I asked Keith if he would be willing to try a threesome, and when Keith said yes, he would be willing, then we went to Don, and the three of us sat down and discussed if this might be a possibility, and Don said yes as well….
He makes it sound so easy!
The relationship came to an end when Don was diagnosed with and eventually died from cancer, leaving Bob and Keith behind. Bob and Keith have continued their relationship since Don’s passing and now live together as a married couple:

There is video at the link.

Finally, Jillian Page at wrote about bisexuality, marriage, and solidarity...
Love often requires making personal sacrifices, as most people know. I set aside my bisexuality and my polyamory beliefs for my partner, who insists upon monogamy in our relationship. It’s not a huge sacrifice, because I love her and vice versa. But as a bisexual person, there are needs that won’t be met for me.

I think there are people who need polyamory, and there are people who can function well in, and enjoy, a polyamorous relationship but don't need polyamory.

Having made an earlier reference to a joke about the monotony of marriage she wraps up with... 

However, unlike some 7 percent of my LGBT brothers and sisters in the United States who, apparently, are opposed to same-sex marriage... and any other people who might be opposed to the institution of monogamous marriage in general, I am not against people getting married, no matter their sexual orientation. I would vote in favour of monogamous marriage for those who want that sort of relationship.

But, if I had my way, I would be married to a man and a woman . . . And I wonder how many people would say no to allowing me that sort of marriage if asked to vote in a referendum on the issue, especially in the United States?
Good question. The more people think about it, the more they support the right of an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race, or religion to share love, sex, residence, and marriage (or any of those without the others) with any and all consenting adults, without fear of prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.
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