Vicky Wireko wrote at myjoyonline.com under "Reality Zone: Why would a father sleep with his biological daughter?"Without yet getting to the text of the piece, the terms need to be defined. By "sleep," she no doubt means intercourse. But is she referring to rape or is she referring to consensual sex? Rape and lovemaking are two different things. Rape should always be illegal. Lovemaking should never be illegal. But "biological daughter" can mean a woman the father didn't meet or didn't have a relationship with until she was an adult, or at least hasn't had a relationship with since an early age. Consanguinamory initiated through Genetic Sexual Attraction has a different dynamic than consanguinamory growing from an existing sociological relationship.
Why would a father make love with his biological daughter? I'm talking about CONSENTING ADULTS here.
For many of the the same reasons a man would have sex with any woman:
He's a heterosexual male and she's a receptive or initiating female he finds attractive.
They love each other.
It feels good and is fun. This is especially true when it comes to consanguinamory.
To bond.
To express love.
To have children.
Some of them have been brought together through Genetic Sexual Attraction, some of them haven't.
There are many reasons, but they shouldn't need to justify it to anyone else. Why is ultimately theirs to share, not anyone else's business. Perhaps a better question is why wouldn't/shouldn't he? Sex is not a bad thing. Those who think it is are probably doing it wrong.
What did Wireko have to say? Let's see...
Everything is certainly wrong with a father sleeping with his blood daughter.Does she give a reason?
It is repugnant apart from the fact that it is a taboo in our custom.Ah, Discredited Arguments #1 and 2.
However, when a father’s love for his daughter straddles beyond parental love veering off to lust, to the extent of sexual abuse, it becomes horrendous.Abuse and lovemaking are two different things. She goes on to write about abuse, without giving a good reason as to why consenting adults shouldn't be free to share love, sex, residence, and marriage. Don't like it? Don't do it. But there ARE adult women in loving spousal-type relationships with their biological fathers, despite what prejudiced bigots think.
Please also see Intergenerational Relationships Can Work
why would a woman sleep with her father why would a father and daughter have sex why would a parent have sex with an adult child why would a woman have sex with her father
![Non-Monogamy Diagram [I:FV]](http://www.obsidianfields.com/lj/nonmonogamy2.5.1.gif){kind=link}
I agree with what you've said. my family tree is filled with generations of incest; hell, my parents are half-twins and they seem pretty happy to me! Now I'm living happily in an incestuos-polyamorous relationship with my father and brother and gave birth to a beautiful and healthy girl from that same love everyone said is evil and wicked. Incest isn't evil; rape, abuse and prejudice are! we had to flee to an uninhabited island to escape persecution. so pls ppl, lift the ban against incestuous love, allow ppl like us to live a normal life
ReplyDeleteI agree with the comment above. There is nothing wrong with any relationship as long as all parties are consenting. The whole genetic argument for incest doesnt hold water. Yes, there may be increased chances, but increases or no, you can't have an increased risk to a genetic defect if you don't have the defects to begin with. Besides, the majority of gene defects in a person come from external influences like chemicals or natural radiations. On the other hand, incestuous relationships would actually "purge" the population of genetic problems due to those with defects possibly having less mates. So it would actuall be distilling the population. But that eugenics and I'm not a big fan of that, I'm just stating the obvious. Thats how dog breeders do it. But yes, definitely, incestuous marriages(or any marriage) should not be condemned or unlawful. People who fight and are abusive should. Of course once again from a higher perspective maybe even some people need domestic violence in their life on occasion. ;) lol In all seriousness though, a loving, caring, compatible relationship should be whats sought, not material wealth or gain, not this person fills my needs(because people change), not peer pressure etc.
ReplyDeleteI'm not opposed to "positive eugenics" - parents engineering their own or their children's genes, choosing not to have children, or selecting partners, based on their genes, since that's just free choice. The problem is when the state steps in and starts telling people who they can and can't consensually have children with, and beyond that forcing some people to have children together. Follow that path too far, and you put democracy in danger.
DeleteYou're right, and I agree with all of your reasons. So many people won't even debate whether or not such a relationship is ok, they are completely closed-minded. I can only hope that things change for the better over time.
ReplyDelete-Liz Smith
I am a healthy, well-adjusted male that just happens to be in love with his biological father. From the very beginning of my life, I knew that I had a strong bond with my dad, so it only seemed natural when we started making love, even to this day. My trust in him as a child was absolute, when I wanted to know what it was like to kiss, I asked him to teach me. When I wanted to know how anything worked, felt, tasted, etc. my dad was there to help me out and I wouldn't have had it any other way. I remember asking about anal sex and he just said, "you'll know when the time is right", and I really and truly did. I was in my late teens and we jerked off and sucked each other daily, when one day it just occurred to me that I wanted our bond to be complete. I remember him telling me that he would be honored if I entered him and put my load deep inside him. We talked for about an hour prior to making love, because he wanted to be sure that when the moment arrived, that I took the act as seriously as he did. Well, needless to say, it was the most intense orgasm of my entire life. Looking into his eyes while buried deep inside him was the most exciting moment of my life. He simply told me that he loved me, and considered this the moment of our bonding and that nothing would ever break the bond. I leaned down to kiss him and held myself completely still as i ejaculated inside he man whom I still live with today, my father, my lover and my partner.
ReplyDeleteThat moment we fell completely in love and just like he said, the bond was forged and has never been broken. Many of our friend know that we are a couple and it seems strange to them at first, we're really just like any other younger guy/older guy relationship to them. I'm 48 and my dad is 77 now, and not a day goes that by pressing into his body, takes my breath away.
I never felt raped, ashamed, dirty or any of the other things that society tells me I should feel like. Through love and respect, I have never been forced to do anything I didn't want to do, and likewise for him. My dad's retired now and I'm getting close to packing it in myself. We dream of a place that other couples like us can spend the rest of our lives in a safe and understanding environment. For now, I'll just keep working and doing what makes me happy. In my life, I've never known rejection, fear or shame, I just wish that every kid could say the same.
Anonymous, thank you for sharing that and congrats on your love. I'd very much like to hear more but even if you just want to take, pleae contact me at fullmarriageequality at yahoo dot com
DeleteI agree with you completely. I would have no objections to a woman and her father having a happy sexual relationship. I firmly believe that neither society nor the government should be able to tell consenting people who they can and cannot have sex with.
ReplyDelete-Liz Smith
As someone who has been in a relationship with his sister, I can honestly say, the familial role plays no part in the relationship, my relationship was like anyone elses relationship, no less special no less precious, it had ups and downs, tears of sadness and joy, it was a great relationship and it was a bad one too, our actions towards eachother defined what it was and if whether or not it was right or wrong, because of the laws view on our relationship, we had a warning handed to us to cease contact with one another until, as the cops put it "we where in the right frame of mind and saw eachother as only brother and sister", if not, we where looking at jail time, we hadn't done anything wrong yet somebody in her workplace who checked her cell when she wasn't looking deemed it "offensive" and worthy of criminal prosecution, to me, she gave me the best 7 years of my life, it's looking now like there won't be another 7 to follow, I miss my sister but more than that, I miss the person I fell in love with standing infront of me.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous, thanks for sharing that. I'd like to talk with you to know more about your situation. What a terrible interference from an outsider! You can reach me a fullmarriageequality at yahoo dot com or on Facebook at /fullmarriageequality
DeleteMy sister and I shared an apartment whilst attending the same out-of-town college some years ago. Before then (whilst living with our parents and being still at school) we never had any sexual interaction. However, about 3 months after sharing an apartment, we started talking about our sexual desires and what we visualized as the ideal partner. My sister admitted that she would very much like to have a boyfriend just like me; I likewise admitted that my ideal girlfriend would be just like her. We are both blessed with a high libido. To cut a long story short: after long discussions and soul searching, we decided that we saw each other as the ideal sex partner. We agreed to try to be intimate once, and once only, and if either should have any reservations afterwards, that we would not do it again.
ReplyDeleteWe ended up under the shower, kissed a lot, and I entered her. When fully inside, we kept still for quite a while, considering whether to proceed. It ended up with us making love for the first time, and me depositing my semen inside her. (She went to the medical clinic the next morning to obtain the "morning after" pill, so as to prevent an unwanted pregnancy).
After again discussing the situation, we both agreed that we found it mutually satisfying, fulfilling in each other's sexual needs, knowing the sexual history of each other, and would continue making love.
For the next three years we continued making love on average five times or more a week. She went on the contraceptive pill, since both of us preferred flesh on flesh without a condom separating us.
Our parents never found out, except our mother who certainly suspected something. During one holiday period when we were at home, mum asked my sister whether she was on the contraceptive pill. "Why on earth do you ask something like that?" my sister replied.
"Well, I don't want you to fall pregnant, especially not with your brother" was mum's reaction. She never raised the topic again.
We hid our relationship to our friends by mingling with others, and going on dates with other students.
Sadly, when we completed our studies our relationship came to and end after we moved to different cities. Both are married now to somebody else, but whenever we meet privately we discuss our wonderful years of being sibling lovers.
Anonymous, thanks for sharing that. Sometimes love is hard to hide, hence your mother's reaction. If if you haven't done so already, please write me at fullmarriagequality at yahoo dot com
DeleteI hope,some day all people will have a right to marry and to live a full and loving life without persecution.
ReplyDeleteBeing old fashioned I don't quite understand people doing sex 'for kicks' though some teenagers may experiment and learn the hard way about getting pregnant accidentally and or an incurable STD.
ReplyDeleteHowever, people at times don't seem to be able to avoid falling in love even with someone they don't want to fall in love with such as a family member. It is perhaps a choice whether or not they act on
it.But it might be hard not to act on it, if the other person felt the same way and the love was requited.I don't think there is any law stopping two people from being in love. Sex doesn't mean love, as prostitution proves. But consanguineous marriage was OK for Sarah and Abraham so I guess sometimes it is appropriate.Even the Kings of Egypt recognised consang love, and one of them did not try break up Abraham's consang marriage. That should be precedent enough. I am not even sure if Abraham had a marriage certificate proving he was married to Sarah.
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