You Might Be Able to Resume Where You Left Off

If comments are a little too explicit for this blog, I don't publish them. Sometimes, I quote them in a new entry, though. "Dominick" left a comment on this entry. He explained that he and his sister would, as youths, frequently engage in sexual experimentation and play. They didn't continue.

As covered in other entries, this can be a normal thing.

Dominick then had some questions. 

I have this very strong desire to make love to my sister. To have actual intercourse. Am I pig for feeling the way I do now??? I'm very confused if the way I feel is natural. Or if something is wrong with me.

Good news, Dominick! You are not a pig for feeling that way. Yes, it is natural. Nothing is wrong you, at least not in this respect. Feelings like this are natural even if some people don't have them or have opposite feelings. Also, some people have such feelings even if they don't have a history of experimenting together. You know others who have these feelings, and you know others who did the same things, even if you don't know which people in your life they are.

The important thing is, what, if anything, do you want to do about those feelings? This might help. Also, like anyone else, please feel free to reach out if you have more questions or want to discuss these things further.

Opportunity for GSA-Involved to Help With a Media Project

I was contacted by someone who is working on a media project relevant to people who have been involved with reunion Genetic Sexual Attraction.

My name is Tess, I work at HALAL Docs, the documentary department of a film production company in Amsterdam. I came across your website regarding marriage equality and I am hoping you can help me with the following request. 

For a very special documentary project, made by HALAL Docs, I’m looking for people whose lives have been touched by the Genetic Sexual Attraction phenomenon. 

They are...

...looking for as many people as possible who want to share their story with us, regardless of the format. Our intention is not to make a report but a beautiful, long and good documentary about living with GSA.

While I have a good feeling about this effort, I can't personally vouch for it. You can research the organization for yourself. As always, use caution in media interactions. It would be good if people who've experienced GSA would at least email to discuss what the possibilities are. There are ways of including people in things like documentaries while still protecting them from certain risks and protecting their privacy. And some of you are in places where you're not breaking any laws.

You can email Tess at tess[at]halal.amsterdam

You are also welcome to contact me for my thoughts about participation and necessary protection, given what your personal situation may be.

Of Fire, Powder, Vibrations, and the Irresistible

This blog is here to advocate for the rights of all consenting adults to be together how they mutually agree. Included in that is supporting ethical or consensual nonmonogamy. Unfortunately, because of lingering laws and prejudices about consanguinamory, many people can't be open about their attractions and experiences; cheating, which we do not advocate, can happen in such a negative environment as people do not feel free to discuss things openly and honestly with their partners, or anyone else for that matter. Again, we don't advocate cheating, but we recognize that some consanguineous sexual relationships do happen in the context of cheating; many reunion Genetic Sexual Attraction situations involve this. Still, there are things we can learn about relationships in general and consanguineous relationships especially by interviewing people who have had such experiences.

The woman interviewed below formed a family with partner and having a child together, but she's deeply torn because of something that happened to her.

In much of the world, including all but a couple of US states, both she and her other lover could be criminally prosecuted for this, not for the cheating, but for having sex with each other.

Read the interview below and see for yourself what this articulate woman has to say. You may think his relationship is interesting, or it might make you uncomfortable, or you might find it ideal, even highly erotic and romantic; you might find the cheating to be unacceptable. But whatever your reaction, should this be a crime? Shouldn't they be able to be open about their relationship and even marry, if that's what they want? Also, notice that aspects of the relationship are common to GSA relationships that don't involve cheating, too. We don't condone cheating, but even a relationship that involves cheating can help give an understanding of the dynamic of consanguineous relationships, as this is happening everywhere, and clearly she feels extremely conflicted. You can tell how this is weighing on her when you read what she has to say. It's a terrible shame that there isn't more research into this and more help available.

*****

FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Describe your background.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

In the US, Monday is a holiday, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day. He was a giant in the fight for civil rights.



Many decades after he was assassinated, the fight for civil rights continues.

History is on our side. All consenting adults will be free to exercise their rights to share love, sex, residence, and marriage.

Are you like those who kept trying to keep some people second-class citizens, or are you like the people who marched with King?

This is how you can help.

The Anticipating Brother

Genetic Sexual Attraction is real, and the people who experience it often have their lives turned upside down. Sometimes, when there are mutual feelings, things will work out so that the lovers can be together.

"Richard" and the woman he love were in a state of mutual anticipation when this interview was conducted, providing a perspective that comes from a different place than previous interviews that have involved people who were together for a while.

People in consanguinamorous relationships are everywhere, though consanguinamorists tend to be closeted. Fortunately, some are willing to be interviewed for this blog. As a result, Full Marriage Equality has featured scores of exclusive interviews with lovers are denied the freedom to be open about their love and are, by law, denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law.

Richard should be free to marry the woman he loves, yet they can't legally marry, and they could be imprisoned and have their lives ruined if they were outed to the wrong people. They are consenting adults who aren't hurting anyone; why should they be denied their rights? In much of the world, they could be criminally prosecuted for their love

Read the interview below and see for yourself what this man has to say. Should these lovers be denied equal access to marriage or any other rights simply because they love each other this way?

WARNING: Mildly expressed sexuality.

*****

Search of the Day

This is a search that brought someone here...

is sex with a sibling through marriage illegal

It is important to remember that laws vary from country to country, and in the US, laws vary from state to state.

What would be a "sibling through marriage?"

When people marry, they make their siblings in-laws to their spouse. For example, Pedro and Paul get married. Pedro's sister Juanita is now Paul's sister-in-law, and Paul is her brother-in-law. Also, Paul's sister Mary is now Pedro's sister-in-law, and Pedro is Mary's brother-in-law. Some see Mary and Juanita as sisters-in law, and it is legal for them to marry, at least wherever two women can marry. Mary and Pedro would only be able to marry and Paul and Juanita would only be able to marry where polygamy is legal, or if Paul and Pedro divorced first. But then they would no longer be be in-laws. As far as sex, there isn't any place in the US where it is illegal for someone to have sex with their in-law, as far as I know. I'm not an attorney, however.

There are stepsbilings, and they are considered, from a social perspective, siblings through marriage, although laws in most places would not recognize them as siblings unless an adoption made them adoptive siblings. For a simple example, Mike has a son named Greg and Mike marries Carol, who has a daughter named Marcia. This would make Greg and Marcia stepsiblings, meaning siblings by marriage. In most, if not all, jurisdictions, they could legally marry or have sex because they are not considered legal siblings. Although, they would likely face social discrimination, especially if their parents married when they (Greg and Marcia) were very young and they were raised together. In some stepfamilies, there are legal adoptions. For example, Mike becoming the legal father of Marcia through adoption, or Greg becoming the legal son of Carol through adoption. In such cases, there are more likely to be laws barring Greg and Marcia from marrying or even having sex. However, stepsiblings do have sex, perhaps even more than blood and adoptive siblings.

People shouldn't even have to ask these questions when it comes to sex or marriage. The only questions that should matter are:

1) Are they legal adults and legally competent to consent?
2) Do they mutually consent to this?

That should be it. Nothing else should matter. That is why we promote full marriage equality and relationship rights for all.

If you have questions or comments, whether it is about being with your in-laws or stepsiblings, or something else, please contact Keith or comment below. You can comment anonymously, if you'd like.

Polyamory and Half Siblings

I was asked a question recently.

Q: In a poly family (say husband-wife-wife, all unrelated) is consanguineous sex between the half siblings of more, less, or average frequency?

A: It probably depends.

I'm not aware of any studies on this, so we need to look at this based on what we already know.

A) We know that half siblings who aren't raised together have a high likelihood of experiencing a strong attraction when they meet or are reunited post-puberty.

B) We know people raised together in close quarters, closely related or not, often develop and aversion of being sexual with each other (Westermarck Effect), or at least a suppression of sexual attraction for each other, but many siblings, whether full, half, step, or adoptive, raised together do experiment and some get more serious. To experiment, minors or anyone still "living at home" need not only the curiosity and/or attraction, but they need privacy or at least be allowed to experiment.

C) We know that polyamorous families are diverse, with varying parenting styles and attitudes towards sex. If the Westermarck Effect is at least partially the result of socialization ("nurture") rather than being exclusively nature (such as genetic), then parenting can make a difference.

D)  home in which the parents aren't a polyamorous triad or "V" might be a single parent home, a home with two parents, a parent-stepparent home, a parent-grandparent home, or other combinations.

Why GSA Will Become Even More Common

Genetic Sexual Attraction is going to become a bigger and bigger issue, and this is one reason why. This isn't the first time that someone involved in IVF or handling sperm for professional purposes has substituted their own sperm. This report comes from fox59.com in Indiana... [This entry has been bumped up.]

Now, retired doctor, Donald Cline, is charged with two felony counts of obstruction of justice for statements he made to investigators.

Those charges come after a lengthy investigation by FOX59’s Angela Ganote.

Last May, she spoke with a group of eight siblings, and according to court documents, Cline is a DNA match for all of them. The now retired doctor allegedly admitted to some of the siblings his sperm could have been used up to 50 times.

That's just what he's admitted to.

New Year Resolutions

Do you make New Year's resolutions? Have you been thinking about it?

May we suggest some? In no particular order...

• I resolve to support the rights of adults, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race, or religion, to share love, sex, residence, and marriage (and any of those things without the others) with any and all consenting adults, without prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.
  
• I resolve to be personally available as an ally to anyone in my life who faces discrimination, bullying, or mistreatment on the basis of their gender identity, sexual orientation, or the type of relationships they have.
  
• I resolve to be welcoming and supportive of anyone who comes out to me, whether they are coming out to reveal their gender identity, their sexual orientation, or their relationship.

Maybe this year won't be about a resolution in the traditional sense, but about a personal goal. Maybe you've been considering coming out, whether in general or to a few people in particular? Or maybe you've been considering pursuing a relationship, or adding something to an existing relationship? Whether you take action or not should be up to you (and anyone else who has to consent to the action, if that applies). Either way, know you are supported here.

Do you have plans? Are you going to make resolutions? Feel free to comment below, including anonymously, or to contact Keith.

Happy New Year!

Search of the Day

Someone came to this blog by searching...

Mums and sons in GSA explosive sex

Having talked with hundreds of mothers who've had sex with their adult son and hundreds of adult men who've had sex with the mother, I can say that whether they were reunion GSA cases or the son was raised by the mother, the sex is usually "explosive." Not always, but often it is.

There are people shocked and disgusted by the thought, but this is the truth whether anyone else likes it or not.

The older woman-younger man pairing can be quite a match in the first place, but when the "double love" or "double bond" of consanguinamory is added, you get mother-son relationships in which those who've experienced them find it hard to describe just how powerful the experiences can be.

Those who have had these experiences often report that nothing else compares.

Neither person has to be "conventionally" attractive or in the best of shape (although some are) for this to be the case. The attraction can be be strong and the feelings extremely intense. Mothers are often surprised just how much their son wants them and delights in adding that bond. Even their own feelings might surprise them. Some sons, likewise, are surprised at how their relationship develops.

As with any relationship, there can be problems, but without the complications of cheating being involved, the biggest issue, usually, is allowing societal prejudices to cause emotional conflict.

It is more common than you think. Right now, not far from you, there are a mother and son who are in the heat of passion, having the time of their lives, loving and being loved, closer than they've ever been before.

There is no good reason adults who are free to be together and want to share sexual affections, with or without romance, should be denied their rights.

Are you having feelings like this for your mother or son? Do you think or know your mother or your son has these feelings for you? If you're involved, or used to be, or considering getting involved, you are encouraged to contact Keith. You can also comment below, including anonymously.

(By the way, all of the above also goes for mothers and daughters, fathers and daughters, and fathers and sons.)

Hate Adds Pain to Genetic Sexual Attraction and GSA Relationships

I'm bumping up this entry I wrote a while back because there are people who need to see it.

Genetic Sexual Attraction (GSA) is a condition that may be experienced when close genetic relatives who have been separated for significant amounts of time, often since birth or before puberty, are reunited or introduced. It describes an intense physical and/or emotional attraction, and may include sexual attraction or be expressed through sex. The attraction may or may not be mutual. Even if mutual, not all GSA results in sexual contact. (Some people prefer the term "Genetic Attraction.")

Reading accounts or watching documentaries about those struggling with GSA feelings or related actions can be heartbreaking. There are many reasons as to why.

First of all, there are all of the problems that come with any attraction or any relationship. One person is attracted to someone else and that attraction is not mutual, or is mutual only for period of time. Relationships involve at least two different people who are trying to get along with each other and to deal with those outside the relationship as well. This can all be increased when the individuals are biologically related.

This new attraction and resulting relationship can bring change, disruption, and uncertainty to someone’s life, which is again something that may happen in general relationships as well, but can be more of an issue with biological relatives and the strong pull of GSA. This is especially a problem when someone has made a life and perhaps has existing vows with someone else. For example, a married, monogamous woman who gets in contact with a biological half-brother and finds herself strongly attracted to him and wanting to spend time with him, with or without sex. The time and attention taken from her marriage may be enough of a problem, but add sexual cheating to the mix, and it is even worse. She may love and value her husband, but feels this intense connection or draw to her half-brother that must be suppressed if she wants to have a chance to save her marriage. In that case, either choice is painful. Or what if she doesn’t want to save her marriage? What if it was dying before the GSA issue surfaced? Divorce is usually a painful experience anyway.

Some people experiencing GSA are disturbed by their feelings (or the feelings of their relative) because they feel a need to have that person in their life as a sibling, a parent, or a child, and they see sexual attraction or sex as incompatible with that role. They may feel like they finally had something they were missing for so long, only to have it taken away by unexpected or unwanted feelings and resulting tensions. Just the unfamiliar nature of these feelings may be bothersome.

In addition to all of the usual problems someone with an unrequited attraction or a mutual attraction between people can bring, one that is different with GSA is, of course, the legal, familial, social, and religious prohibitions imposed against sex with and marriage to close relatives. Incest between consenting adults is still criminalized in many places, including most US states, and bigotry against people in such relationships or experiencing such attraction continues to be perpetuated, sometimes in the most hateful and harmful ways.

This is sometimes compounded by a lack of solidarity. Even if there is a GSA relationship that didn’t break up any existing families, marriages, or relationships, and the individuals are happy together and able to share their lives in a functional way despite legal and social challenges, they may be rebuffed or judged when they reach out for understanding and support from others. Other people experiencing GSA who have decided not to have sexual relationship or have ended a sexual relationship or want to end their sexual relationship may disapprove of those who want to engage in or continue their sexual relationship. Or, if the GSA relationship is intergenerational, interracial [biracial with non-biracial], same-sex, or polyamorous, other people experiencing GSA may express disapproval based on one of those factors (in addition to all of the other people who disapprove based on those factors). Finally, those who have recently struggled or are still struggling for their own freedom to marry or just the basic freedom of association, such as LGBT people or poly people, may express contempt for consanguineous sex and love, including in cases where GSA is factor, or may be unsupportive of those in GSA relationships gaining the freedom to marry. Thus, instead of finding comfort from those who have also been targeted by those who want to control the sexuality of other adults, people experiencing GSA may find some more vitriol or at least a cold shoulder.

All of these things can bring pain and hardship to GSA relationships. Laws and public attitudes can be changed. There is some help for those struggling to deal with their feelings or the feelings of someone else or just to be themselves, but that help would be greatly aided by a change in the laws and public attitudes. That is one reason I call for solidarity. Someone who is struggling with GSA does not need the added burden of laws and finger-wavers that treat them as second-class citizens or with hate and impede their ability to make decisions in the best interest of themselves and their loved ones.

For help, see here.

[Edited for typing errors and clarity.]

Happy Holidays!

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah (belated), Yuletide Greetings, Solstice Salutations, Happy New Year, and Happy Holidays!

Whatever holidays you celebrate, or even if you don't celebrate any, We wish you a fabulous season full of warmth and love.

May you and your loved ones have peace, health, and happiness.

I plan to update this blog as I can over the holidays, so keep checking back. Or better yet, subscribe in the column over there on the right (for those of you looking at the web version)  if you haven't done so yet.

As a reminder, if you need someone to talk with or you just want to say hello to Keith, you can do so, as always, by emailing fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com or message him on Wire at fullmarriageequality or on Facebook.