Equality., Life, Liberty, and Happiness

July 4 is Independence Day in the US, considered by many our country's birthday. Connected to the day is the Declaration of Independence, which touts equality and notes that we have the rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

When the Declaration of Independence was written, equality was reserved for white, landowning, heterosexual, Christian males. Great strides have been made to extend equality to everyone else. As we know, equality just for some is not equality. In recent times, we have seen many pro-equality court rulings and laws, including the Supreme Court ruling for the nationwide limited monogamous same-gender freedom to marry.

More people are coming out of the closet, and more allies are coming out in support of equality. More people are getting married, and now we have more polyamorous and polygamous people speaking up for their rights.

But we’re still on our journey. Equality, liberty, and the right to pursue happiness are, in many places in the US, and at the national government level, still denied to LGBTQ people. Even more so, these rights are denied to the polyamorous and the consanguinamorous. The US still struggles with racism.

Let’s keep moving forward so that an adult, regardless of race, religion, sexual orientation, or gender, is free to pursue love, sex, residence and marriage with any and all consenting adults, and not be denied liberty, employment, housing, or anything else.

This isn't just a philosophical thing or a principle. There are people, good people, who are hurt by ongoing discrimination, prejudice, and ignorance. There are people just being themselves, hurting nobody, and people who are in loving, healthy relationships who are being denied their rights, who have to hide who they are or their love for each other, who constantly endure people proclaiming that the love they share is sick or disgusting or makes them worthy of being subjected to abuse or death. There are teenagers who have simply behaved as normal teenagers with each other and haven't hurt anybody (including each other or themselves) who are being lied to and told that nobody else is like them and they are depraved. That's no way to have to live, it certainly isn't liberty, and it squashes the pursuit of happiness.

They need to know they are not alone, and there's nothing wrong with them.

We need independence from hate and ignorance. So let's keep evolving America, and encourage other countries to do the same.

Accept that Others Should Have Their Rights

There seems to be a scale of prejudice when it comes to consanguinamory. The most vilified relationships are those between adults and their parent(s). A question about this came up on this blog's sister Tumblr.

Being Consanguinamorous After Abuse

As the title of this entry indicates, abuse will be discussed, so if that is likely to be a problem for you, please skip to another entry.

We Get Letters About Consanguinamory

This blog takes comments and you can also contact Keith directly. Here are some "letters" that have come in over the last few months.

After "Acceptance Not Condemnation," Anonymous wrote...

I'm living with my aunt right now and have for 8 years and we love each other. She's my half-aunt(mother's half sister) and is 10 years old than I am. We've always been close and I moved in with her when I left my parents' home to go to college and things blossomed from there. 

I don't think anyone in my family knows as we haven't told anyone and we don't show affection in public. We also have a separate bedroom set up for me for appearances, but we sleep together every night. If I could marry her, I would, but for now, we are very happy, even though we're in secret. Maybe one things will change, but for now, we'll just keep doing what we're doing.

Fortunately, close relatives can usually live together without bigots or gossips attacking.

A message I got from an Anonymous bemoaned a lack of solidarity...

I’m a lesbian, with my lesbian aunt. That’s one reason I’m not too big on the whole LGBT movement. Being in an incestuous relationship with aunt, I learned to keep my business to myself.

That's too bad. There should be mutual support, not division and condemnation.

On a previous post featuring letters, Anonymous wrote...

Father's Day

Sunday, June 21 is Father's Day.

For all men raising or helping (or has helped) to raise a child, whether you are a biological father, presumed father, grandfather, stepfather, bonus father, adoptive father, foster father or any variation… Happy Father’s Day!

A special thanks to fathers who have supported and loved their children who are LGBTQ, polyamorous, consanguinamorous, or have otherwise faced persecution or oppression because of who they are or the person(s) they love.

Also, a note of encouragement to all fathers who can’t legally marry the person(s) they love, but would if they could, or who face bullying due to love or who they are: We will win so that every adult can pursue love, sex, and marriage with any consenting adults.

If you have a good father in your life, are you planning anything special for Father's Day?

Some considerations if you have, or are considering, a more physical relationship with your father...

Happy Loving Day

June 12 is Loving Day! We celebrate the Loving family, and the victory of Loving v. Virginia, which helped advance civil rights in general and the freedom to marry.

Let's keep moving forward to full marriage equality so that an adult is free to marry any and all consenting adults!

Consanguinamory After Physical Distancing

Over the last few months, some of you have been staying home with family due to restrictions and physical distancing requirements, and some of you still are. On the other hand, some of you have been kept away from family (along with everyone else) because these conditions.

We've addressed these realities in several posts like these...

Family Making the Most of the Distance

So Much Time At Home

Spending More Time With Family These Days?

"I'm Stuck At Home With Family"

Now, more and more, people are regaining their freedom and confidence to get out and about and see each other.

What happens now if you entered into new territory with a close relative or family member over the last few months?

You Did the Taboo - Now What?

There is no reason the pleasurable things that happened during the physical distancing must end. You'e definitely not alone!

If you and a family member (or two, or three...) discovered the joy of sharing sexual affection with each other, there's no reason to pull back from that if all involved would like to continue.

For some of you, that will mean continuing your sexting, whether or not you agree to do more when you're face-to-face. For others, that will mean continuing your increased physical affection even though you can now see others. You might even find yourself preferring to keep your close relative(s) as your primary or only sexual relationship.

The possibilities are many, and they are up to those of you involved. What you mutually agree to do and what you negotiate with each other should be up to you, not to anyone who isn't involved.

These posts might help...

Cautious Consanguinamory

Family With Benefits

How To Pull Off Living With Your Consanguinamorous Partner(s)

There are also some of  you who have seen your family member(s) in a new or intensified way as a result of what has been going on for the last few months, but you haven't acted on your feelings. This might help you.

You can tell us what you've been doing or feeling in the comments below. You can also contact Keith privately.  You can also join a forum for people with experience in consanguinamory, and their allies.