Hiding in Plain Sight

Most people who contact us who have experience with Genetic Sexual Attraction or consanguinamory do not want to have something specifically about them published on the blog. Others are featured in an interview. Rather than an interview, what is below is more of a monologue Anonymous gave me about her relationship and the backstory behind it. I would describe this as relationship that developed from reunion GSA.

There is no good reason people in these relationships should be criminalized or otherwise discriminated against. The prejudice against these relationships hurts people and causes problems.

Read for yourself what this woman has to say. Names have been changed to protect those involved...


*****

We've had to hide in plain sight for a long time.

My parents were married in the early 1980s after being together for a very short time. My dad failed to inform my mother that he had a son, John, from a previous wife, and daughter, Mary, from an affair.

John was a handful and his mother placed him in a boarding school. My mother, newly married, could not imagine willingly placing a child in an institution. She convinced my dad to go get him and for the next three years, they worked to mold him. Things were not meant to be. My brother struggled with addiction and tried different avenues of employment to fight his demons. 

He got married, then joined the military to support his pregnant wife.

I was born when John was 19. I had no memory of him except pictures and my mother's stories.

I did see him in the mid 1990s when he visited. I was still a very young girl, and saw him again in 2000 when he helped us move.

My mother died of cancer when I was still a minor. I'd write to John. We got to be friends. No one really knew my mom so it was nice to be able to talk to someone who did. Our letters were never sexual or anything like that. We just wrote back and forth. He would try to counsel me, which at times, was condescending to my 16-year-old self.

At 18, I got pregnant with my son right after high school graduation with a boy who took no responsibility. I moved in with my dad. John came to love with us. He loved my son the moment he laid eyes on him. He would play with him and watch him whenever I needed a sitter. My brother and I became great friends.  

In 2010, we had a very in-depth conversation and we just kissed. It did not feel wrong. If anything, a very strong attraction developed. This secret affair took place for the next few months with no one the wiser. 

We rented a place to get away from my suspicious family. John's adult sons moved in with us. They were taken aback by the relationship but they were happy for us. Or at least that's what they said. They ended up moving back out of state after a natural disaster nearly killed them.

I became pregnant with my second son, who has ocular albinism. He also has a rare benign tumor disorder. 

Our entire family on both sides know. Mary, our half sister, won't talk to us. It's too weird for her. As for the rest of our family, they couldn't care less. 

We keep each other out of trouble. I love him as much now as when we first connected in 2010. We purchased a home, three cars, have taken multiple vacations, have four dogs and have two steady jobs, and are raising two wonderful kids. Very few people know the truth about us. We don't want our kids taken away. We are good, kind, solid people but we are involved in a very old taboo relationship. I swear we are soulmates.

*****

It's good to have supportive family and friends.

If you want to read more about the issues of consanguineous lovers having children, read this.

There are millions of others "hiding in plain sight." You know some, whether you know it or not.

We wish Anonymous and John well on their relationship and hope they'll keep us updated.