A Growing Family Denied Their Rights

We have another exclusive interview to bring you. 

People in consanguinamorous relationships are everywhere, though consanguinamorists tend to be closeted. Fortunately, some are willing to be interviewed for this blog. As a result, Full Marriage Equality has featured scores of exclusive interviews with lovers denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law. Most can’t even be out of the closet or they’ll face persecution and prosecution under absurd incest laws, which, instead of focusing on abuse, also target consensual relationships.

The lover interviewed below should be free to legally and publicly marry his spouse, or simply be together without having to hide, yet they can’t. Prejudice can be deadly. They are consenting adults; why should they have been denied their rights? In much of the world, including where they live, they could be criminally prosecuted for loving each other this way, and might be persecuted severely in addition.

Read the interview below and see for yourself what he has to say about the love they share. You may think this relationship is interesting, or it might make you uncomfortable, or you might find it ideal, even highly erotic, but whatever your reaction, should lovers like these be denied equal access to marriage or any other rights simply because they love each other this way?

Also please note that someone you love, respect, and admire could be in a similar relationship right now. Should they be attacked and denied rights because of the "incest" label? 

NOTE: This interview has a brief amount of sexually explicit description. Separately, there is also mention of a sexual assault.

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FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Describe yourself.

Adam: My name is Adam, 25, and I am a Software Engineer. My mother's name is Bethany, 39, and she is also a Software Engineer. I was not conceived under pleasant circumstances. When my mother was 13, she was raped. My grandparents refused to let her get an abortion as they were religious nuts. Nine months later, I was born.

We are white Americans. We both have Bachelor's degrees in Computer Science and Engineering. It wasn't because we had a passion for CSE. We did it because the salary is very good.

We used to live in California, but when we had the option to work from home, we took it and moved to New Hampshire. We relocated because we knew many people in California.

I like to play video games and go to the gym. I am a fit guy, not one of the buffed-up ones you sometimes see in the gym. Lifting weights makes me feel alive. I also used to drive my bike at high speeds, but I stopped doing that recently.

FME: How would you describe your gender(s)? How would you describe your sexual orientation and your relationship orientation... are you heterosexual, bisexual, what? Are you monogamous, polyamorous, or....?

I am a heterosexual male. I have always been in monogamous relationships. The thought of sharing my partner in any form makes me uncomfortable.

FME: You are in a sexual/romantic relationship with your biological mother?

Yes I am in a sexual and romantic relationship with my biological mother.

FME: What was your childhood like? What was family life like? Were alternative lifestyles/sex discussed in your family, and if so, how? Can you describe your sexual awakening?

My mother's life was filled with many hardships. In her words, I was the only light in her dark world. She never wanted me to face the same hardships she had, so she completed her education despite the challenges. She went to school, spent time with me, and completed her assignments. After finishing school, she made the hard decision to go to college so she could provide a better life for me, away from her parents.

During all this, she never forgot me. Even during her college days, she came back as much as possible. I used to feel lonely during those times, but I compensated by spending time with friends. Later on, I understood why she had to do this, and I am still grateful that she did.

When I was 18, I became the father of a boy. My girlfriend at the time didn’t want to become a mother and wanted to give the child up for adoption. I couldn’t bear the thought of not being part of my boy's life, so I took custody. My ex-girlfriend gave up her parental rights.

My mother didn't want me to stop my education, so she assured me that she would raise my boy to the best of her ability while I went to college.

My first kiss was when I was 13 and I had sex for first time when I was 15. I was always attracted to females and I had unprotected sex sometimes. I have also realized that I have always been a high-libido person.

There was no discussion about alternative lifestyles/sex at my home. There was no father figure at home. So I had to explore these things on my own.

FME: When/how did sexual affection become a part of the relationship between mom and son?

It was during Covid lockdown when everything changed. Since the day I was born, my mother has never trusted any male except me. I started to slowly see her more as mother of my boy instead of my mother. It started when I noticed that my baby boy called my mother “Mom” instead of “Granny.” He also used to call me “Dad.” This started changing how I used to see my mother. I started seeing her as a beautiful woman.

By the end of 2020, I couldn’t deny the fact that I was sexually attracted to my mother. But I was not sure if the feelings were reciprocated. So I started leaving subtle hints. Like touching her longer, having very emotional conversations, looking directly in her eyes with lust, checking her out when she was near me, flirting with her, kissing close to her lips instead of cheeks, wearing less clothes, making sure she sees my body, not hiding my erections from her, etc.

I could see that it was having effect on my mother. She also started doing same things. She went as far as wearing very revealing clothes and giving me very tempting views.

FME: Can you describe your feelings during that process? How about “the day after”? How did that go? How were you feeling?

All the efforts culminated on Christmas of 2021 when we were drunkenly making out. I was groping her breasts and ass. She was also massaging my d---. When we broke the contact and saw in each others eyes, all we saw was lust for each other. Perhaps it was our drunken state, sexual desire, emotional codependency and loneliness, because we took the major step and broke the ultimate taboo.

We ended up in my mothers room. We didn’t f--- each other as we expected we would do. We made love. We make out for some time. We took off each others clothes. I went down on her. After that, my mom couldn’t control herself and said “Please, I want you inside me.” After seeing the desperation in her eyes I knew that she, too, wanted this.

From the moment I entered inside her and finished inside her, it was all was slow and emotional for both me and my mother. We were kissing each other periodically throughout the sex. Even sucking her breast was very sensual. After sex, we kept exploring each others body, cuddling and sometimes kissing each other.

I also had thoughts like:

I was entering the place where I came from.
How my sperm inside her have the capacity of creating a life.
How she would be carrying her grandchild and her child at the same time.

My mother woke up first next day. She simply remained in my arms. That/s how I woke up in the morning, with my naked mother in my arms. There was no guilt, regret, disgust or awkwardness. I think it was due to our aversion of religion due to my grandparents, and our already very strong emotional bond. We just added physical part to our relationship.

We talked for hours about what we want in life and how to move forward.

FME: Before this, had you ever thought this would be possible or enjoyable; did you have any opinion one way or the other about close relatives or family members being together?

Before Covid, if you had asked me this question, I would have screamed "NO." I do not have any close relatives who are together. I never had these feelings for any other family member.

To be honest, I was never close to any family member because of how they treated my mother. At this point I do not even consider them family. They are just humans with whom I share genes with.

FME: How do you describe the sex now?

Sex with my mom is very different than the sex I had with my previous sexual partners. Now there are so many emotions involved. We are both very kinky. There are emotions involved at some level even when we having BDSM. Saying a big F--- YOU to religion and societal norms is also a huge kink for us.

One thing is for sure: sex with my mom is the best sex I ever had. I had so many sexual partners but none compare to my mother.

Me and my mother like role-plays and dirty talk. When I tell her how disgusting she is for having sex with her own son, it is a big turn-on for her. She also talks dirty, like how she is a hardworking single mom and how I am taking advantage of her. We also use slurs. We like being Dom/sub. We both are Dom/sub.

We started using slurs and kinks after a long talk. We didn’t want to hurt each other. We made sure we were both on the same page. We didn’t want the other to feel pressured.

FME: Describe your relationship now. Is this a marriage, a union, girlfriend and boyfriend, “maintenance,” what? Are you more like spouses or family-with-benefits or something else? Do you see each other as mother and son, or lovers, or are those two roles inseparable at this point?

Our relationship is like an unofficially married couple, if that makes sense. We are mother-son only in bedroom. It’s like we have elevated mother-son relationship to husband-wife.

We are like normal couple who have sex like four to six times a week. I know it is more than normal couples, but we both have high libido.

FME: Do you all sleep together, or what are the sleeping arrangements?

We sleep together. We moved from west coast to east coast to a city where no one knows us for this reason.

FME: Does anyone in your life know the full, true nature of your relationship, and how did they find out? What kind of steps, if any, have you had to take to keep your privacy?

None of our old friends know that we are together. I can’t imagine being separated from my son and with another on the way. I would prefer if no one from our old life knows about us.

FME: Having to hide the full nature of your relationship from some people can be a disadvantage. Can you describe how that has been? Are there any other disadvantages? Conversely, do you think consanguineous relationships have some advantages and some things better than unrelated lovers, especially between mother and son?

We are not close to family. Our old friends are busy and have a life of their own. They think that my mother is living with me to help me raise my son.

Consanguineous relationships have pros and cons, especially between mother and son.

Pros: Emotional bonding and comfort in mother-son consanguineous relationships is on whole another level.

Cons: We have to treat every argument very seriously. We don’t have the luxury to act like other couples during arguments. We have more on the line to lose. 

FME: What do you want to say to people who disapprove of your relationship, or disapprove of anyone having this kind of relationship? What's your reply to those who would say that this is one of you preying on the other and that you can’t truly consent?

Some people will disapprove our relationship because they will think that my mother has groomed me. Some people will disapprove our relationship because they will think that I have taken advantage of my mother’s situation. I understand those concerns. But I want to tell them that it was fully consensual. We both wanted this. Neither of us was forced. We are just two people who love each other. We chose this. Like every human, we deserve love. I was 23 when we had sex for first time. I was way above the consent age.

To religious fanatics a big F--- OFF.

FME: If you could get legally married, and that included protections against discrimination, harassment, etc., would you? Or is this a different kind of relationship than that?

Yes if it was legally possible for us to marry we would have.

FME: There’s currently a pregnancy. Was this planned? Are there any medical professionals involved who know the true genetic origin of the pregnancy?

We never used protection. We both wanted another child. There are no medical professionals involved who know the true genetic origin of the pregnancy. But we have used prenatal diagnosis to check for a genetic disease. Our son is healthy. My mother used the excuse that she wanted to know if she will deliver a healthy baby or not.

FME: What do you plan to do as far as raising this child; will you be dad, brother, or both?

We will leave this country after our son is born. He will be born in three months. We are doing this because I want to be there for both my sons as a father. Right now, where we are staying people just think we are younger man/older woman couple. My mother literally looks like she is in her early 30s so people don’t pay much attention to us. They think our age difference is six or seven years.

FME: What advice do you have for someone who may be experiencing these feelings for a relative or family member, especially a mother or son?

Be very careful before taking the big step. It is not easy to be a mother-son couple. Be 100% sure that both you want this. Remember, you don’t have the luxury to fight like normal couple. Every relationship has a fair share of arguments. Just because you are mother-son doesn’t mean that you will not fight. You just have to deal with it very carefully.

Sometimes, you will also feel lonely. You can’t socialize like normal couples do. One slip up is all it takes. Take us for example: we have to go to another country to live like normal couples. We have the means to do it, but not everyone does.

I am not trying to discourage anyone. I am just trying to point out everything you need to keep in mind before you start as a mother-son couple.

If there is no health risk then I don’t see any reason why sons can’t provide their mothers sperm if they want more children. Just check for genetic diseases.

FME: What advice do you have for family members and friends who think or know that relatives they know are having these feelings for each other or are involved with each other?

My advice is that if it is fully consensual on both sides and there is no case of grooming, then leave them alone. Don’t make their life difficult. And if you find it in your heart, then accept them.

FME: Any plans for the future?

The immediate plan is to move to another country and raise my family. I want to embrace her and kiss her in public.


FME: Anything else to add?

My mother had gone to therapy before Covid lockdowns for her sexual assault. So if anyone thinks that our relationship is because of that, then the answer is no.

I am also my mother’s first willing sexual partner. Yes, she never had sex with anyone after her assault. She is so happy because she can experience what other women do.

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Clearly, these are consenting adults, and yet they can't even exercise their basic human rights as things are now. They are happy, yet they are denied fundamental rights. They can't even be open about their love without risking harassment or much worse.

Why should they be denied their rights? There’s no good reason. We need to recognize that all adults should be free to be with any and all consenting adults as they mutually consent, and part of doing that is adopting relationship rights for all, including full marriage equality sooner rather than later. People are being hurt because of a denial of their basic human rights to love each other freely.

You can read other interviews I have done here. As you'll see, there are people from all walks of life, around the world, who are in consanguinamorous relationships.

If you are in a relationship like this and are looking for help or others you can talk with, read this.

If you want to be interviewed about your "forbidden" relationship, or that of someone you know, connect with me by checking under the "Get Connected" tab there at the top of the page or emailing me at fullmarriageequality at protonmail dot com or on Wire messaging app at fullmarriageequality, X/ Twitter at FullMEquality, or Facebook. I usually check for private/direct messages and respond in less than a day, so if I don't it might mean your message didn't get delivered.

If you know someone who is in a relationship that's anything like this, or "taboo" or "forbidden," please read this.

Thank you, Adam, for telling us about your intergenerational, consanguinamorous relationship. We wish you well! Good luck on the arrival of your new child.