Wednesday, December 2, 2015

The Pain in Spain


A situation out of Mallorca, Spain is getting international attention as there appears to be an unnecessary removing of a child from her mother.

The most important line in the article by Fiona Govan at thelocal.es is the opening line...

Incest is not against the law in Spain as long as it is carried out between consenting adults, but a father and daughter are appealing after a judge awarded temporary custody of their child to the state pending a full investigation.
Spain is one of the better countries in the world for consanguineous lovers, usually.
The 36-year-old man insists he is in a "unique and loving relationship" with his 18-year-old daughter Sara and that they should be allowed to keep his newborn baby girl - who is also his granddaughter.
The man, who has given his name as Cris, told the local newspaper Cronica Balear that his ex-wife (and mother of Sara) had reported him for abuse because she was jealous of the relationship.
That is not unusual, unfortunately. Friends and family of the consanguinamorous should have compassion instead of being rats.

"And everything was going very well until people found out about it," Cris told the newspaper.

"We may be father and daughter but she has never seen me as a parent because I am much more like a friend than a father figure," he said.
It is fine that someone not see a genetic parent as a parental figures because that person didn't raise them, as is often the case with Genetic Sexual Attraction, but is the obligation of a custodial parent to be a parent first and foremost and raise their children to be independent adults. Since I wasn't there, I don't know if he did that with her or not. But I do remind readers that their relationship is allowed  under the law in Spain, and they would be getting less hate if he was a complete stranger the same age, which seems strange to me. They shouldn't be hated at all, although if he has abused her in any way, he should be accountable for that. A sexual relationship, given her age, is not automatically abusive.
He has denounced the "moral judgement" of authorities in light of the fact that incest is not against the law and the age of consent in Spain is 16 years old.

Of course. Outsiders are potentially tearing his family apart.
His daughter claims that before giving birth she was given two options by social services; to give the baby up for adoption, or move to a centre and raise the child alone.
"When I fell pregnant I knew I wanted to keep it, I have always wanted to be a mother," she said. But within hours of the birth of her daughter last month the newborn was taken into care.
This should only be done if there is abuse. The system has enough to deal with when it comes to children who are actually abused.
"People say (the relationship) is wrong, well I respect their opinion but I do not care," she told the local paper.
Good for her! Notice there is nothing in the article at all indicating that the new mother or her baby has been abused, nor is there any indication that anything is wrong with the baby, and I'm confident the reports would have including anything hinting at that. The ex-spouse is claiming abuse, but has there been any substantiation? Some ex-spouses who have made such claims have been shown to be lying, and his ex has a motivation to lie. So leave them alone. Hopefully, the family will be allowed to get back together and stay together.

She said she wanted to be a mother and in another report at dailymail.co.uk she points out that she helped raise her four younger siblings, so she has some experience. I highly doubt this is a decision she made lightly.


This is, perhaps, the kind of consanguinamorous relationship that gives people the most trouble. They might be less opposed to, say, siblings being together or a mother and son, or mother and daughter, or father and son, especially if they were not raise together or by one another, but the toughest one for people to accept (perhaps because of gender stereotypes) is a father and a daughter he raised, especially if they decide to have biological children together, even though most such children are healthy. But if we're serious about woman having control over their own bodies and things like the age of consent, this comes with the territory. Some young women want this, and that is their right.

2 comments:

  1. I brought this to Keith's attention once I read about it. Personally I feel that they should be left alone to be together and raise their daughter, as long as there was no abuse ongoing. She is an adult now, and should be free to make her own choices, plus their relationship is not illegal under Spanish law. I hope things turn out ok in the end.

    -Liz Smith

    ReplyDelete
  2. If it's not against their law, then why do they get punished?

    ReplyDelete

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