Reality: While some people who’ve experienced Genetic Sexual Attraction have been abused or neglected in the past, many people who’ve experienced GSA never experienced serious abuse or neglect.
People who experience GSA come from a wide variety of backgrounds, including warm and loving families as well as abusive childhoods. The only thing, so far, determined to be common to all people experiencing reunion GSA is that they were introduced to, or reunited with, a close genetic relative post-puberty. Abuse is not the cause of GSA.
If you don’t want someone to be abused, don’t abuse people experiencing GSA. Don’t ostracize them for having their feelings. Don’t criminalize their love. Don't deny them their rights.
See Myth: Sex in GSA Relationships Always Means Someone is Being Abused
See Myth: Anyone Experiencing GSA Needs Therapy
Advocating for the right of consenting adults to share and enjoy love, sex, residence, and marriage without limits on the gender, number, or relation of participants. Full marriage equality is a basic human right.
Monday, June 14, 2021
4 comments:
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Hi FME.~Having written for The GSA Forums for over 8 years continuously and having spoken to and counselled MANY individuals who have experienced various "Categories" of GSA, I can support this statement ." Abuse is not the cause of GSA. " HOWEVER there is definitely a correlation between the intensity of GSA and "unsatisfied early childhood emotional bonding" We have many people come across their genetic relatives and HAVE Absolutely NO Feelings of GSA..Without exception these people have formed Full and Deep emotional bonds with their Adoptive parents AND in some way bear some Physical resemblance to the Family Clan in relation to hair skin and eye colour.. Similarly the ones who have always felt Alien" in their New Environments,are definitely MORE Susceptible to the Full DOSE of the GSA Bomb.Further, there are cases where adopted People find themselves placed in "unhappy and yes sometimes Abusive Family Environments and when these individuals eventually find their genetic relatives GSA is almost Guaranteed. SO I still agree Abuse does not CAUSE GSA, However it can certainly exacerbate it ....Lost SIster :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Lost Sister! Nice to hear from you again. Some of the same thing can go on non-GSA and/or non-adoptive situations in that if someone finds someone they feel understanda them and is affectionate with them, they can fall very hard for them if they weren't getting that already.
DeleteI think it's more complicated than that.
DeleteIt's not necessarily that these people haven't been offered enough affection and understanding in their adult lives, but they may have been more likely to reject it because they won't accept it from just anyone.
People who were separated from their close family members at birth, often come from backgrounds conducive to a range of psychological complications, such as reactive attachment disorder.
Children who don't have one consistent available and responsive caregiver in the first few years of life, are living in a state of constant anxiety or rage due to feeling abandoned, but at the same time they are absolutely determined to NOT let anyone rescue them from that state of abandonment because they cannot trust.
They will resist being hugged, kissed and held, and experience aversion toward displays of affection or expressions of sentimentality, between their parents or even fictional characters on television. They may be anxious, controlling, hyperactive, and always causing fights, scenes, breakdowns of various kinds. They may be desperate for attention every second of every day -- but when they are given attention, they reject it.
Sometimes it's enable by exposure to violence, hostile surroundings, the lack of a safe environment to retreat to in event of danger, the lack of trusted confidants, and so on.
Some of the above may be true not only of GSA cases but also of cases where the individuals have known each other from day 1. When they're each other's only support system, people tend to gravitate toward each other and stick together, sometimes to the exclusion of others. Melanie Klein even associated sibling consanguinamory with "excessive fear of both parents" (The Psycho-Analysis of Children, p. 223).
RE:"Without exception these people [. . .] in some way bear some Physical resemblance to the Family Clan in relation to hair skin and eye colour.."
I guess the bottom line is that physical resemblance to one's adoptive family may also be desirable. I've heard of cases of identity crises in light of interracial adoptions, jeopardizing the adoptees' long-term sense of belongingness.
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At any rate, even if ALL cases of GSA were the result of childhood abuse or neglect, I don't see how that would be an argument against GSA. If anything, it would make a case against attempting to disrupt such relationships.
Imagine two people who had been in angst all those years, or had this void, but everything finally fell together when they found each other. At last everything is alright with the Universe, and their minds are at peace. To take that away from them again would certainly be cruel.
Why can't we just leave the consanguinamorous people alone? they did nothing wrong!
ReplyDelete