Monday, April 22, 2013

Stuff Poly Folks Hear

Here's a sample conversation that many polyamorous people can expect to have with those prejudiced against polyamory...

Prejudiced Person: "Oh, polyamory? So you want to sleep around on your wife and you want her to say she's OK with that? You are so selfish. You just want to have a harem."

Polyamorous Husband: "Actually, my wife has two other partners and I have one."

Prejudiced Person: [pause] "You're sick for wanting her to have sex with other people and making her do that."

Polyamorous Husband: "I didn't make her do anything. She's an adult who makes her own decisions. Actually, she's the one who told me she's polyamorous. She very much likes the way things are."

Prejudiced Person: "So the two of you will sleep around with anyone? Casual sex is emotionally damaging you know."

Polyamorous Husband: "This isn't causal sex, and no we don't sleep around with just anyone. Both of us formed strong emotional bonds with our partners before sex was involved."

Prejudiced Person: [longer pause] "So you're not getting the job done, eh? You're not giving her what she needs. She must be getting ready to leave you."

It won't matter to the prejudiced person if the polyamorous couple has been married for twenty years, during which the prejudiced person has married "monogamously" three times and divorced twice. To many prejudiced people, the only acceptable relationship is a closed, monogamous, legal marriage between a cisgendered man and a cisgendered woman of the same race. Forget about LGBT relationships, or polyamorous relationships, or interracial relationships. And for heterosexuals, according to these prejudiced people, it is out of the question to be happily single, date without seeking a legal marriage, live together without having a legal marriage, have a ceremony without a legal marriage, or involve anyone else through anything from polyfidelity to casual threesomes, from swapping to swinging to open marriage. No, only the way they claim to do it is the only way anyone should do it.

Isn't it interesting how they know what is best for you?

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