Basic Facts About Sex

Based on some of the people who reach out to me, various places on this planet have an appalling lack of sex education. 

That is why I am posting this.

Others have already made basic information about sex accessible online, so I will be linking to them. But there are few things I wanted to stress below.

First, a couple of important links that can answer many questions.

WebMD Health and Sex Guide

Scarleteen

Spend time looking for answers to your questions at those links.

Now, some important things everyone should know...

• "Sex" doesn't refer only to penis-in-vagina intercourse. Any affectionate interaction involving a penis, scrotum, vulva, clitoris, or anus can be considered a sex act.
  
  
• Sex involves consent. Without consent, it is a form of assault and abuse.
  
  
• If one person having sex has a least one functioning "mature" testicle (and hasn't had an effective vasectomy), and the other person has a uterus and a functioning "mature" ovary (and hasn't had a tubal ligation), pregnancy is possible. This is true even if there is never penis-in-vagina intercourse, as all it takes is for a sperm cell to get into a vagina, which can happen if semen gets on fingers, a tongue, or a sex toy or some other object that gets into a vagina. Semen from someone who hasn't had a vasectomy usually contains millions of sperm cells. A healthy adult person can release between 40 million and 1.2 billion sperm cells in a single ejaculation. 
  
  
• There are things one can do to reduce the chances of pregnancy. Each method will have positive and negative considerations based on the individual.
  
  
• "Pulling out" is NOT responsible contraception. "Common sense" would tell you that greatly reducing the number of sperm cells deposited in a vagina will reduce the chances of pregnancy. However, there can be sperm cells emerging from a penis before or without an orgasm. Also, in the heat of passion, one might not pull out.
  
  
• Masturbation is generally healthy, normal, and natural. As with anything else, compulsively masturbating can become a problem or be a symptom of a problem, but in general, masturbation isn't a problem. Also, one should be careful to use enough lubrication to avoid hurting or damaging their skin.
  
  
• Testicles are constantly producing sperm, and ejaculation will typically happen while someone is sleeping if they don't ejaculate often enough through sex or masturbation. Trying to avoid ejaculation for weeks, apart from a kink, provides no physical or mental benefit.
   
• Laws about sex vary from place to place, as do cultural bigotries. Legal age of consent varies. Some places have laws against same-sex affection. Some places have laws against sex with anyone who isn't your spouse. Some places have laws against first cousins having sex. Many more places have laws against closer relatives having sex. There are various other laws, too. Fortunately, most private sex that violates some outrageous, unjust law never becomes a case handled by criminal prosecution. Unfortunately, laws or not, hateful bigots might murder (yes, murder!) consenting adults for having sex, depending on the circumstances.
  
  
• Human sexuality is diverse. What some people might find disgusting otherwise unappealing might be something other people very much enjoy or have a strong desire to experience, and what one person might like might be a turn-off to someone else. People have sex for many different valid reasons. Kinky, interracial, intergenerational, same-sex, group, and consanguineous sex, whether "casual" or in long-term relationships, has always existed.
  
  
• Sexual feelings, desires, attractions, dreams, fantasies, etc., including involving people who are not your partner are common and normal even if you are happily in a relationship.
  
  
• Fictional media is not reality. That includes porn.
  
  
• Someone who isn't in a relationship might not be available, while someone who is in a relationship might be available.
  
  
• While sex is generally a healthy activity, various infections can result from sex, depending on the situation.
  
  
• People who consent to share sex should have the right to do so without fear of prosecution, bullying, or discrimination. Regardless of gender, wanting or enjoying sex doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you. Being asexual is OK, too.