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Sunday, May 31, 2015

What's So Scary About Equality?

If you're not connected to me on Tumblr, or don't at least have my Tumblr blog bookmarked, well, I'm there, too, and there's content there that doesn't make it here.

Someone submitted this to me for response...
I want to thank you, you and thefinalmanifesto have completely changed my mind about polyamory, and marriage equality. I think I hadn't let myself consider it seriously before because I felt like that would be validating conservatives' "slippery slope" arguments about same-sex marriage. You've put a human face on the issue, and made me realize I need to stop being intellectually dishonest. I've got a lot of learning ahead of me. Thanks and continue to be awesome!
This is what I wrote...

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Saturday, May 30, 2015

Oregon Continues to Waste Public Resources Attacking Consenting Adults

The attraction between consenting adults is proving to be so strong that jailing them doesn't deter them, but authorities in Oregon continue to waste taxpayer resources doing just that. We last covered this case here. Jenna Kochenauer at mybasin.com reports that there has been another arrest...
A Klamath Falls man was arrested this week for violating probation by moving back in with the adult daughter he fathered two children with.
Again, they are consenting adults. They should be free to live together.
49-year old Eric Lee Gates faces three charges of incest.
They are consenting adults.  That shouldn't be a crime.
The two children they have together were born in 2013 and 2014… but they don’t have custody of either child because courts say the children have genetic problems that are likely the result of the incestuous conception.
"Likely". Where is the evidence? Print it if you have it. But we don't throw people in jail for having children with genetic problems, and that isn't what he was charged with, was it? No, it wasn't. And I know people who aren't closely related who have children with genetic problems. I'm glad they haven't been arrested.


The story was also reported at kobi5.com.

There is no good reason for the authorities in Oregon to keep interfering in this consensual relationship.

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Thursday, May 28, 2015

A Slowly Simmered Love



If my recollection is correct, this is the 49th ongoing relationship I've covered through exclusive interviews in which the lovers are denied the freedom to be open about their love and are, by law, denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law.

The woman interviewed below, "Andy," is thoughtful, articulate, and clearly able to consent to this relationship. She and her lover should be free to decide whether or not to legally marry. Yet they could be criminally prosecuted and face other forms of discrimination if the wrong people found out about their relationship. They are consenting adults (and a very cute couple, too) who aren't hurting anyone; why should they be denied their rights?

Read the interview below and see for yourself what he has to say. You may think this relationship is interesting, or it might make you uncomfortable, or you might find it incredibly sexy, but whatever your reaction, should these lovers be denied equal access to marriage or any other rights?





*****


FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Describe yourself.

Andy: I grew up in Michigan near lots of rivers and lakes, which has been a lot of fun for me because most of my hobbies involve being outside. I like camping, hiking, spinning fire poi, swimming, and reading.

My childhood was pretty typical. I had a Mom and Dad, two younger sisters, and a younger full brother.

"Ryan", my older half-brother, lived with his mother. My Dad had signed over his rights to him. Ryan's mother's husband at the time adopted him and he moved to another state when I was still very young.  

I was a nerd in school because I wore rock t-shirts and ripped-up jeans. I kind of got picked on for it until the punk rock revival we had and I started playing in bands as a bass player.

I am in between jobs right now due to a bad allergic reaction I had. I've operating heavy machinery for five years now. I'm kind of a tomboy.




FME: What is your sexual orientation and relationship orientation?


Andy: I'd say that I am straight, although I have kissed a few girls. I enjoyed it, too, but I prefer men and monogamy. I'm not too keen on the idea if sharing. I think polyamory is great but I don't know how they do it. I'm not wired that way. I couldn't share my significant other.




FME: Are you married of have you ever been married?

Andy: I've been divorced for three years. Ryan and I are currently in a relationship and hoping to get married in the fall. Since our father is not on either one of our birth certificates we may have found our loophole for that.

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Wednesday, May 27, 2015

A Unicorn Makes Three




If my recollection is correct, this is the 48th ongoing relationship I've covered through exclusive interviews in which the lovers are denied the freedom to be open about their love and are, by law, denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law.

The woman interviewed below is cogent and clearly able to consent to her relationship. She should be free to decide whether or not to legally marry. Yet in most states in the US (her country of residence) she could be criminally prosecuted and face other forms of discrimination if the wrong people found out about her relationship. They are consenting adults who aren't hurting anyone; why should they be denied their rights? Why shouldn't she be free to marry the father of her child?

Read the interview below and see for yourself what he has to say. You may think this relationship is interesting, or it might make you uncomfortable, or you might find it incredibly sexy, but whatever your reaction, should these lovers be denied equal access to marriage or any other rights?


*****


FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Describe yourself.

Cheryl: I'm 44 yrs. old and up until six years. ago I was a devoted housewife. My son and I are from California but we now reside in Rhode Island.


FME: Are you married?

Cheryl: I'm legally divorced but ceremonially married to my son. It was just him and me and we exchanged vows and gave each other rings to symbolize our love.

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Friday, May 22, 2015

Harvey Milk Day

May 22 is Harvey Milk Day. In California, the day was established in 2009 by Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Milk was a politician who became the first openly gay person to be elected to public office in California when he won a seat on the San Francisco Board of Supervisors. Milk served almost 11 months in office,  passing an important gay rights ordinance for the city. On November 27, 1978, Milk and Mayor George Moscone were assassinated by Dan White, another city supervisor.

We don't make progress in the fight for civil rights without courageous and motivated people like Harvey Milk.

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Sunday, May 17, 2015

Tuesday, May 5, 2015

They Would Marry Today If They Could

If my recollection is correct, this is the 46th ongoing relationship I've covered through exclusive interviews in which the lovers are denied the freedom to be open about their love and are, by law, denied the freedom to marry and have that marriage treated equally under the law.

The couples interviewed below are attractive and articulate and clearly able to consent to their relationship. They should be free to decide whether or not to legally marry. Yet they face discrimination and prejudice for their love and are denied the freedom to legally marry. They aren't hurting anyone; why should they have to hide their love or be denied their rights?

Read the interview below and see for yourself what they have to say. You may think this relationship is interesting, or it might make you uncomfortable, or you might find it incredibly sexy, but whatever your reaction, should these lovers be denied equal access to marriage or any other rights?

This relationship could have been initiated through what we call Genetic Sexual Attraction.

BE WARNED that the discussion gets a bit explicit in some places.


*****


FULL MARRIAGE EQUALITY: Describe yourself.

Anonymous Woman: I am 29 years old. I am an office manager of a local roofing company in [a Rocky Mountain state.] I am a writer and that is the job I love. I have a high school diploma and am close to completing my Associates in Psychology. I am Native American/American Indian, 5’1”, brown hair, brown eyes.

Anonymous Man: I’m 27. I am a white male. I have a high school diploma. I currently am in the military on the guard side. I work as a security officer in my civilian job. I like music. I believe it is a key to the soul and a way of self-expression.

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Monday, May 4, 2015

The Husband Swap is Now Available





At independent.co.uk, interviews our friend Louisa Leontiades about her experiences with ethical nonmonogamy and her new book, The Husband Swap


What did you learn from becoming polyamorous?
I think if there overarching lesson, not only from this kind of relationship but all of it, is to really try and love yourself with everything you do because if you don’t that hatred for yourself and dislike will be projected onto others and your low self esteem will lead to insecurity and jealousy and possessiveness and entitlement.
Relationships often bring growth and learning, and polyamorous relationships often mean more growth and learning.





Do you have a message for people who call you [a slut]?

I don’t tend to respond to “slut”. What I will respond to is reasoned argument and I haven’t found one yet that I can’t call out a logical fallacy or a societal norm that is assumed as a norm for everybody. The slut ones… It’s their opinion and they are entitled to their opinion but they’re not the people I’m trying to reach. Many people simply jump on the bandwagon.

For those it offends, any change or any difference in lifestyle or inclination that threatens the norm does threaten the establishment. Many of the minority movements have basically the same battle, where their choices, simply by being different have threatened other people’s sense of their own rightness. The mind sometimes equates being right with surviving, in order to survive people like to be right.
It's great to see that this book is now available!

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